Worst Joke Ever 2024

[James105]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Prove God doesn't exist.

Of course that is not possible.

Just in the same way it is not possible to prove that fairies, unicorns, Santa and goblins do not exist.   

 

Of course if you can prove that god does exist then you will turn me into a believer.    If you have a direct line to this omnipotent being then please tell this almighty wizard to come down and show himself.   If this entity cares about whether or not puny humans believe in him then I am sure he will be along anytime now to demonstrate this.   

[hotchilli]

3 hours ago, transam said:

Oh, what did the dinosaurs do wrong....?   

Nothing, just happened to coincide with an earth-bound rather large rock that didn't end well.

[brianthainess]

3 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Oh please explain what a 'divine presence'' is, did he/she/it come and talk to you? 

is his presence being felt in Turkey right now? You can keep talking to imaginary friends if you like, but doctors have a word for that.

[jvs]

1 hour ago, AgMech Cowboy said:

Go Woke!! Go Broke, or in this case they will lose more than they will gain.

 

God is Mighty and Omnipotent.  He loved the people of the world, which He created in "His" image (does not mean all the same genitals), so much that He impregnated a young virgin who bore and birthed His Son. He then let Him be persecuted, tempted and then hung on a cross.  

 

Have you never seen the 'color' of jewish people? Or observed from history books the dress that people wore at that time. His skin was most likely similar to that of the Greeks or Iraqis, which is really neither 'white', 'brown' or 'yellow'. He was originally a carpenter so He would have worked outdoors and indoors. When He got too much sun He burnt and turned mostly red.

 

The people of the time did not wear pants. nor did they wear dresses. The Roman soldiers wore a linen undergarment. Over this they wore a short-sleeved, knee-length woollen tunic. Romans originally believed that it was effeminate to wear trousers. However, as their empire expanded into territories with colder climates, soldiers were allowed to wear leather, skin-tight trousers.

 

If you don't believe in God that's is your right. I hope you'll have an experience that will change your mind before you die.

 

God Bless

Life is to be lived,not controlled.

Certainly not by any God?

[brianthainess]

21 hours ago, KannikaP said:

Probably because a lot of us were using it in place of 'Dislike' which was scrapped a while back.

Also along with confused, thumbs up/down.  

[sherwood]

GOD, and I also believe in the tooth fairy. Struth.

[KannikaP]

6 minutes ago, brianthainess said:

Also along with confused, thumbs up/down.  

No, thumbs UP is still there, together with Like, Thanks and Love It

[brianthainess]

1 minute ago, KannikaP said:

No, thumbs UP is still there, together with Like, Thanks and Love It

No thumbs up there for me 'cept this one  

[Doctor Tom]

4 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Not sure how old you are but better to dedicate your life to understanding and experience the power of the spirit rather than ridiculing. 

HaHa, good one mate 

[Scott Tracy]

On 2/8/2023 at 7:57 AM, Chomper Higgot said:

Well he certainly wasn’t white with blue eyes and blond hair.

And you know this for sure? You knew him, met him?

[pomchop]

44 minutes ago, brianthainess said:

Oh please explain what a 'divine presence'' is, did he/she/it come and talk to you? 

is his presence being felt in Turkey right now? You can keep talking to imaginary friends if you like, but doctors have a word for that.

yeah give me a quart of "divine presence" with chocolate syrup and a cherry on top..

 

..religious people are a real hoot trying to sell stories wilder than santa and the tooth fairy and Easter bunny....difference is that while kids believe that for a while most of them realize soon enough that it was all just a big lie to make them feel good and try to get them to behave (Santa knows who's naughty or nice)....unfortunately many of them when they become adults still can not distinguish the fairy tales from the truth and live their lives talking to imaginary things in the sky with their "santa list" of things they would like Mr Big to arrange to have happen.

 

   To which I say "grow up".

[Scott Tracy]

4 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Not sure how old you are but better to dedicate your life to understanding and experience the power of the spirit rather than ridiculing. 

That's the spirit in the bottle? Very powerful.

 

you believe what you want to believe, let others believe what they want to believe. 

[transam]

1 hour ago, hotchilli said:

Nothing, just happened to coincide with an earth-bound rather large rock that didn't end well.

So they say......????

[VocalNeal]

4 hours ago, transam said:

Oh, what did the dinosaurs do wrong....?   

Tyrannosaur's arms too short to pray???? 

Edited February 9, 2023 by VocalNeal

[Lee65]

Where's the Laughing Reaction icon?

[bangon04]

On 2/8/2023 at 7:57 AM, Chomper Higgot said:

Well he certainly wasn’t white with blue eyes and blond hair.

In the next movie Jesus will be a black lesbian in a wheelchair......

 

Just what the bible needs - yet another rewrite to suit social conventions.

 

Better not tell the Catholics - they will have to issue a Fatwah....I mean an inquisition... I mean a campaign on social media....

[bangon04]

On 2/8/2023 at 6:58 AM, jvs said:

Genesis 1:27.

Opening up a big can of worms there i would think.

While they are at it,maybe cancel the bible as a whole?

Too many offending facts in there.

 

The bible was compiled by committee of (male) church /sect leaders in the first place. Why not keep it up-to-date?  Maybe give the contract to Marvel......

 

[bangon04]

3 hours ago, Will B Good said:

As Stephen Fry said......"bone cancer in children....seriously?"

 

What kind of God does that?

In addition to Stephen Fry, I recommend Christopher Hitchens .

[bangon04]

5 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Not sure how old you are but better to dedicate your life to understanding and experience the power of the spirit rather than ridiculing. 

What is the definition of "Blind Faith"? Is it someone who refuses to ask any qustions?

[bangon04]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Prove it.

What is the definition of "Blind Faith"??

[pomchop]

54 minutes ago, Scott Tracy said:

That's the spirit in the bottle? Very powerful.

 

you believe what you want to believe, let others believe what they want to believe. 

don't u know that it is many religious peoples goal to get as many people as possible to buy into  whatever they got brainwashed into believing....it's what they do.....

 

my favorite is be the biggest murderer rapist child molesters crook con man and worst for 75 years but confess to it all and accept the tooth fairy as your savior on your death bed and and all is forgiven so  roll on through those pearly gates.......if not burn in hell for double  eternity.....

[bangon04]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Exactly, God can't be proven not to exist, ergo God has to be possible.

same as the whole of the Marvel Universe and Darth Vaderand an honest Thai politician???

[bangon04]

3 hours ago, AgMech Cowboy said:

God is Mighty and Omnipotent. 

If God is omnipotent, He/She/It must take responsibility for all the pain and suffering in the world.

Omnipotence excludes the concept of "Free Will", so God is subjecting little children to suffering for His?Her/Its own entertainment.

If Free Will exists.. then Omnipotence cannot.

 

[bangon04]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

They are a bit sad, presumably because they believe that once they die they become nothing. Everything they were vanishes forever.

I'd say they are certainly wishing that they become nothing as non believers don't get to enter heaven, and go to the other place.

Our "AfterLife" is the sum of our achievements in Life. We will be remembered for our good deeds. We will be remembered for our bad deeds. If we do nothing of interest and have no family we are soon forgotten.

Hitler will be remembered a lot longer than the Bishops of the Church of England.

[Kwasaki]

51 minutes ago, Lee65 said:

Where's the Laughing Reaction icon?

Yes it's needed in answer to OP's question. 

You then wouldn't have to waste time giving your reaction. 

[NativeBob]

The concept of Trinity is the best ever: he turn himself into dove, did <deleted> underage arabian girl (which was married) just to impregnate her with himself, later watching himself dying on the cross. and yes, resurrected himself while [guess?] watching the whole saga.

I'd choose Shiva. More entertaining, less whipping.

[VocalNeal]

Seeing as their are no reported sightings of God then I can go with the entity being androgynous.

But Jesus wasn't the messiah. He was a very naughty boy.

[FritsSikkink]

5 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Nope, loads of people use science and logic: God is Imaginary - 50 simple proofs

[Kwasaki]

7 minutes ago, NativeBob said:

The concept of Trinity is the best ever: he turn himself into dove, did <deleted> underage arabian girl (which was married) just to impregnate her with himself, later watching himself dying on the cross. and yes, resurrected himself while [guess?] watching the whole saga.

I'd choose Shiva. More entertaining, less whipping.

I dunno i thought the religion that the mafia follows is the best, you can kill and break any law and near your death you can ask for forgiveness. 

[transam]

5 hours ago, Neeranam said:

The only scoffer at God are the ones who have not experienced divine presence. 

Not sure how old you are but better to dedicate your life to understanding and experience the power of the spirit rather than ridiculing. 

I had a divine presence when I was about 15, I never forgot her.......????