American man faces dilemma as Thai girlfriend’s parents demand 1 million baht dowry

[Shaunkuntep]

Take her to the US and marry her there.

Tell her you will marry in Thailand in the future when you save enough money as 1 million is not enough for such beauty.

Get your land/house/car before the Thai wedding.

There is always something which will delay it and after all you are already married.

 

[Grusa]

15 hours ago, Trippy said:

A million baht will get me literally 1,000 short times, screw marriage.

That's only a 3-year supply!

[bbbbooboo]

......hmmmm.... this isnt a dilemma. This is simple commonsense(which isnt that common these days i might add). Is she worth 1 million baht? if not  dont pay it to the greedy grasping parents. If she is then let the buyer beware( for all the reasons outlined by others)

[Adumbration]

4 hours ago, Jonathan Swift said:

Fake or not, it serves as food for thought for anyone BEFORE they find themselves in a similar dilemma. And as you must know, MANY have had lives ruined by conniving wives, and their families, lawyers, banks, and realtors. As to this forum, it's tabloid and has no aspirations beyond clickbait - it sells ads. Most of us know where to go for quality news content. 

No food for thought here whatsoever.... Zero

 

Thais regularly pay sinsot in excess of 1 million for a lady who is educated and from a good middle class family.  I personally know three lads that have done so.

 

Are you new to Thailand or do you have amnesia?  Remember the story a few years back where the Thai BF capped both the mother and the daughter because the mother requested 1 million sin sot?  Middle class family that owned a successful car parts business and the BF just walked into the shop and started shooting.

 

And NEWS FLASH 1 million baht is chump change nowadays.  A good deal of the members on this forum will suddenly realise that when the financial requirement for a Non-O extension is increased to 1.6 million.

 

With all purchases in Thailand, it pays to be a prudent shopper.  As I posted here months ago the GF's older brother in his late 50s married a very pretty 17 year old girl from their village.  Whole village showed out for the wedding.  Sinsot was laid out for all to see...50K THB.

[Adumbration]

15 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Easy answer is just live together, no marriage.

Might work for ex bar girls, rice farmers and slappers.  Will not work for an educated attractive girl from middle class family.  No need to worry about an upper class girl, she would not be seen dead with a farang.

[Skipalongcassidy]

1 hour ago, Walker88 said:

Yes, because it's obviously up to the foreigner to give in 100% to Thai culture, while the family in a Thai-Foreigner marriage is under absolutely no obligation to give an inch toward the foreigner's culture. /sarc

 

Perhaps I haven't had enough time in Thailand to understand the subtle difference between buying a woman short term from an agogo and buying a woman long term from her family. It seems both ways the woman is just a good for sale.

 

I'm not a 'cheap ass without a pot to pee in'; I can easily pay $30K or $1 million, but damn if I'm going to buy a spouse just because she's Thai. I prefer being single to buying a wife.

 

It IS about the money in Thailand. I understand. And money=face. It is also going to be expected that the 'farang' continue to give in to 'tradition' forever.

 

Nice guy? Loving and devoted? Who cares? Means nothing without the cash, and this---ironically---in spite of the local faith where the goal is to be without want or desire. It's almost as if they're saying, "Sure, deity, I want to be without want or desire, but how will I truly know I have no wants or desires until I've experienced money?"

 

So how much did you pay for your wife?

 

The wedding march is not "Here Comes the Bride", it's the late Tina Turner singing...."What's love got to do with it?" followed by the O'Jays "money money money money"

Thank god that I could care less about you... there's an old saying... "when in Rome......" It's not about the money at all... it is about outward display of caring and devotion... it is common in many many cultures including the USA just expressed differently.  I wouldn't expect you to understand...

[Hakuna Matata]

If you refuse to pay sin sod, you don't deserve to have a Thai wife!

Even most Thai men have to pay sin sod.

This is a very good thing to do.

You can always negotiate the amount of sin sod.

But YOU MUST PAY!

[Trippy]

19 minutes ago, Grusa said:

That's only a 3-year supply!

You da man! 555

[Trippy]

3 minutes ago, Hakuna Matata said:

If you refuse to pay sin sod, you don't deserve to have a Thai wife!

Even most Thai men have to pay sin sod.

This is a very good thing to do.

You can always negotiate the amount of sin sod.

But YOU MUST PAY!

One more reason to go with a Filipina.

[rumeaug]

15 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Easy answer is just live together, no marriage.

That is exactly what i do. I'm in a happy relationship since many years already, but no marriage (i made irt clear since the beginning). No hassle ????

[transam]

35 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

A Thai fellow paid 500,000 for a lady in my village...

 

And many years ago, a young Thai fellow that I knew was borrowing money and working hard because his wealthy bride to be - her family wanted a 15 MM baht house built for their daughter.... 

 

some people here think sin sod is just a custom made up for farang

My Thai stepson got married 2 years back, he paid sin-sod, the mother is using it for the newly-weds future............

[1FinickyOne]

3 minutes ago, transam said:

My Thai stepson got married 2 years back, he paid sin-sod, the mother is using it for the newly-weds future............

That happens too... it is handled quite individually... if my kid ever marries, I would handle it exactly the same... each family is different as to needs and actions... 

[BritManToo]

18 minutes ago, Adumbration said:

Might work for ex bar girls, rice farmers and slappers.  Will not work for an educated attractive girl from middle class family.  No need to worry about an upper class girl, she would not be seen dead with a farang.

And yet the most upper of upper class Thai women married a White American.

[gaucan]

15 hours ago, transam said:

How old are you, 15....................

to old, nowadays they do at 12

[BritManToo]

37 minutes ago, brianthainess said:

Or just get married for free at the Amphur office, no big ceremony there, and that would prove her love for him. but as usual here its all about face.

I would say, as usual it's all about greed!

[transam]

2 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

That happens too... it is handled quite individually... if my kid ever marries, I would handle it exactly the same... each family is different as to needs and actions... 

As you probably know, if parents pay for a good education, then it is sort of accepted that their daughter is a fine catch, so the ritual is done.

 

Our lad's wife has a degree in something, she is also a hard worker, he is very lucky........

[animatic]

My mother in law wanted to give me 8 breeding hogs for our marriage. I had to politely decline and gave her a hug. 

[Chelseafan]

We did 1 million Dowry but only for her to show face. I got all the money back after the wedding.

 

My in-laws were very savvy to realise that that they would be much better off in the long-term than taking the Sinsod. ????

 

[transam]

15 hours ago, Ben Zioner said:

@transam ("She was married before....?")

 

Nope. But I didn't say I didn't give any money to her parents who needed it. No wedding, but now they live in a nice house and have two beautiful grand daughters.

But they did think you were a sh_t for quite a while, that's for sure....

[thecyclist]

15 hours ago, Ben Zioner said:

At that 1000 Baht for ST it will cost you a fortune in Antibiotics and Antivirals. 

No, just a small amount for condoms. 

[mberbae]

The gentleman best forget this woman and her family.

The dowry is just the beginning. He will be paying for

every little " emergency " for the rest of his life.

The fact that the fiance is fine with this says it all.

[NorthernRyland]

59 minutes ago, sambum said:

"expects to marry a much younger woman and not pay up."

Are you saying that Thai women are a commodity with a price tag?

women don't want men with massive age gaps so she wants to be compensated. Seems fair to me.

[NorthernRyland]

43 minutes ago, Adumbration said:

Thais regularly pay sinsot in excess of 1 million for a lady who is educated and from a good middle class family.  I personally know three lads that have done so.

Why would anyone pay for an "educated women" as if her knowledge from some Thai university is ever going to be useful to you. Only exception is if her eduction got her a good job and she's going to be give YOU money as a result.

[NorthernRyland]

38 minutes ago, Hakuna Matata said:

If you refuse to pay sin sod, you don't deserve to have a Thai wife!

Even most Thai men have to pay sin sod.

This is a very good thing to do.

You can always negotiate the amount of sin sod.

But YOU MUST PAY!

this is such a retarded comment. Many middle class normal families don't do sin sot and many of us can attest to this fact. Seems mainly the rural poor and wealthy big city families are most interested in the tradition, but at the very least greedy wealth seeking types.

[Cabradelmar]

How old is they guy and what is he doing dating college aged students. Probably a teaching maintaining the grand tradition of isaan teachers banging their students. Dowry is a very real and current tradition in isaan (amoung Thais). But 1m THB is extortion (even of she was a virgin with a college degree).

[SoilSpoil]

11 hours ago, BenStark said:

I shagged her in a hotel near her home the day before the wedding, and again in Pattaya about a week after the wedding,

 

Wow, you are so cool.

[transam]

Just now, Cabradelmar said:

How old is they guy and what is he doing dating college aged students. Probably a teaching maintaining the grand tradition of isaan teachers banging their students. Dowry is a very real and current tradition in isaan (amoung Thais). But 1m THB is extortion (even of she was a virgin with a college degree).

You married a Thai pensioner then...............????

[Walker88]

43 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

Thank god that I could care less about you... there's an old saying... "when in Rome......" It's not about the money at all... it is about outward display of caring and devotion... it is common in many many cultures including the USA just expressed differently.  I wouldn't expect you to understand...

No, I don't understand. It's a Thai-American marriage, but HE must be the only one culturally sensitive and understand women are chattel and must be purchased like a rug or used Toyota.

 

If it takes money to be 'an outward display of caring and devotion', then it ain't love.

 

An actual outward display of love and devotion is to be a faithful and devoted husband, not a family ATM.

 

I wouldn't expect you to understand.

[transam]

Just now, SoilSpoil said:

Wow, you are so cool.

And he thought, "Thank gawd for that, I thought I would always stay a virgin"........????.....................????

[transam]

2 minutes ago, Walker88 said:

No, I don't understand. It's a Thai-American marriage, but HE must be the only one culturally sensitive and understand women are chattel and must be purchased like a rug or used Toyota.

 

If it takes money to be 'an outward display of caring and devotion', then it ain't love.

 

An actual outward display of love and devotion is to be a faithful and devoted husband, not a family ATM.

 

I wouldn't expect you to understand.

Load of tosh, from a bloke worried about paying.................????............