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Dan discusses his Pattaya Bargirl relationship and advises others to not do the same.

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4 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

 

I don't accept Bing as an authority over that of a sheep farmer. Although possibly he was pulling my leg.

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1 minute ago, champers said:

In some Pattaya bars blokes in their 50s and 60s get more excited about a birthday party than a group of 4 year olds would. For jelly and ice-cream replace with piglet on a spit.

But, did you enjoy it............?  🤗

4 hours ago, Goat said:

Ok, did you do what Dan did and fall for a Pattaya prostitute?

Or did you find normal girls like you would have if you were still in your home country?

Would Dan have dated a prostitute back in England? Unlikely. It is weird how some people do that in Thailand. Self esteem issues?

 

"Normal" girls back in England aren't usually interested in settling down with guys in their 50s-60s (unless they're a superstar or Rupert Murdoch).  Even UK prostitutes are more likely to setttle down with a younger guy as their boyfriend/pimp.  Hence the attraction for some of Thai bargirls!  It doesn't seem weird at all to me.

1 hour ago, Goat said:

Thats my point.

 

Why would any 30 year old male be in a relationship with a Thai hooker? They are for the old fat divorced farangs.

 

Maybe because some of them are hot and available right now.

And maybe they go in a bar and just want sex but then they think: That's a nice girl. Let's spend some time with her.

56 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

The sex worker expat relationship is flawed because the expat has to pay monthly if you don't want them to work and if you pay there's a good chance they don't really like you

 

 

Bot necessarily. Some girls are happy if you pay for daily life - just like you would pay for a normal girl or wife who has no job.

Personally I think it's fair enough to pay for daily life, and maybe even a little pocket money.

But if she demands 5-digit monthly payments just to be with you, then it's obvious that she is not with you because she loves you.

 

9 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

Good post.

This is also connected to what I was preaching in the "love songs" thread.

A lot of people still think marriage is based on love and romance.

When all marriages are basically transactions where money and security is the biggest factor.

So bar girls are as good as any other girls, give or take. You have to look at their personalities and make sure you understand what their expectations are. 

 

Exactly. There is a 23 year age difference between myself and my GF. I have no doubt at all she chose me for financial support. The love, trust and mutual consideration came later.

6 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

Exactly. There is a 23 year age difference between myself and my GF. I have no doubt at all she chose me for financial support. The love, trust and mutual consideration came later.

I deleted my post because I thought I was banging my head against the wall.

But thanks for your understanding. 

You understand how it works.

1 hour ago, Neeranam said:

Dan?

Watch from 1:12

2 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

But IMHO there are still some girls around, who just started with that job and are happy to stop it and settle down for one guy only.

 

I have no recent experience but decades ago (I'm talking 1970's and 1980's) in Bangkok bars and nightclubs there were some great girls, sweet natured, well mannered and beautiful  - but they didn't last long because they were snapped up quickly and installed as mistresses by well off farang and Thai guys.There were a few places attracting both foreigners and Thais where these diamonds might occasionally be found.There was no real mass tourism at least in the 1970's and the expat residents were generally a classier (not better just posher) lot than the current typical Pattaya farang.The likes of Dan, with his distinctive gor blimey accent, were not a significant element.

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At no age should one be paying for a continuous sex-relationship. A hooker with all respect exists for a one time stand and that's it. Getting into a relationships usually leads to dramatic consequences for the falang.

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8 hours ago, timendres said:

 

Smart men do not pay for sex. They pay for the woman to leave after they've had sex.

 

 

 

You know, over the years, I'll bet I haven't heard that more than about 500 times.       Amazing how it just stays so completely fresh each time it's used.

 

Often known or seen young adult european ladies, with  inner issues due to an absent or unknown dad, to hook up with a guy 30 or 40 years older. Not as much visible as in the streets of Pattaya obviously 😂, but it does  happen more often then one may think. No money involved. Just deeper rooted issues that make it possible and happen.

 

But in Thailand, in long renting a ex-bargirl or soapy fishbowl beauty, the main risk is that she would probably be having somebody else behind to share the money (another farang-sponsor, b/f or husband). Things can get bad if one of these chaps gets jealous, or wants more or gives her a viral STD.

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54 minutes ago, Sigmund said:

At no age should one be paying for a continuous sex-relationship. A hooker with all respect exists for a one time stand and that's it. Getting into a relationships usually leads to dramatic consequences for the falang.

If a guy can afford it, why not?

The important part is he should not forget that he pays.

If he pays regularly and he thinks she loves him that is a problem.

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5 hours ago, Goat said:

Dan does. He gives advice to others on his very popular vlog.

About love, money, work and Thai people.

 

 

It's not popular at all and mostly about the dump he lives in

Never a good idea to get involved with a bar girl, for more than a few nites. And if you are going to get involved with the bar girl, the only way is if you know positively that she's just gotten started in the business, and the only way to know that is to hire a private detective. So, really just not a good idea, especially for a good looking guy in his thirties.

 

That's verging on insanity. Or desperation. 

12 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Never a good idea to get involved with a bar girl, for more than a few nites. And if you are going to get involved with the bar girl, the only way is if you know positively that she's just gotten started in the business, and the only way to know that is to hire a private detective. So, really just not a good idea, especially for a good looking guy in his thirties.

 

That's verging on insanity. Or desperation. 

A private eye can also be a tricky issue, if one falls on a crooked PI who will get a bribe from the bargirl and split his wages with her to give the guilable farang a clean chit. A bit paranoid, but it can happen considering the greed, corruption and money scheme involved within the parties here.

Most men that will get involved with a bargirl or freelancer. Usually don’t have much going for themselves.   They might have the cash, but that’s about it

20 hours ago, Goat said:

Interesting insight from famous Thai blogger Dan.

Never heard of the person... and not going to bother looking.

Especially concerning this subject which has been covered a billion times.

18 hours ago, Lacessit said:

IMO the key to having a good relationship in Thailand is to never let anyone know how much you have

 

I agree. As soon as I show a girl how light my bank balance is they run a mile.

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This guy has about as much charisma and talent as a grain of sand which is why I deleted his feed some time ago.

 

Always someone trying to spoil the fun. Either you don't have the funds required to attract a younger lady or you live in a world where love is all that matters.

7 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

And if you are going to get involved with the bar girl, the only way is if you know positively that she's just gotten started in the business, and the only way to know that is to hire a private detective.

Ask guys who go regular to bars and like those kind of girls and they will be able to tell you after a few minutes if she is new in the business - independent of her age. 

18 hours ago, Goat said:

Was she from Issan? 

Half the older generation are not even sure of what day they were born on. Birthdays were never a big thing up there and hardly celebrated at all until recently.

They think it is a bit silly to carry on about a birthday. Who cares really?

Absolutely true.  My wife has no idea of her real birthday.  And it was a few years before her mum went into town to register the birth.  She thinks she's about 3 yrs older than her passport age.

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18 hours ago, Goat said:

Good question. 

I would say if you want someone under 30 which seems to be the preference i would expect 60+ year olds to mostly be paying, but not all.

 

But to see a 30 year old expat walking around Pattaya with a prostitute, I think that looks pitiful IMHO.

You would have to have very low self esteem to not find a real girl.

 

Maybe just a short time at that age. But not a full time sponsor girlfriend experience relationship which I think there is a big difference.

Dan also addresses this point.

 

Are you this "Dan" guy?

 

You seem quite invested in this thread, which makes me wonder if you are really Dan.

 

As for your the subject, I am always a bit confused when it comes to sexual morality. Maybe when I'm older I'll be more clear.

 

According to some---and I think you---it is immoral for a woman to be paid for sex, but absolutely okay if she has sex because she's horny. The goodness of one vs the other escapes me. Secondly, a guy who pays for it is a loser, but a guy who sleeps around---often giving women a false impression of genuine affection---is something between a stud muffin and the second coming of the messiah. Apparently we should all applaud him because "he's getting it for free".

 

The "free" part is also a bit confusing. A guy whose real intent is just to bed a woman might take her to a fancy dinner on his dime, using the meal as the beginning act of seduction. He's paying, but just rationalizing. If he simply picks up a woman in a club and goes to his hotel or condo, or even a short time hotel, then he really isn't much of a stud because he is probably her thousandth partner. If he picks up a very inexperienced woman, seduces and beds her, then I suspect he has created a false impression in her that he's serious. Those three have precious little moral difference.

 

Though I admit to having a degree of moral confusion, I think even a genuine stud---the kind of guy who can easily attract a carnal partner---takes a more moral high road if he pays a woman who knows it's merely a business transaction, rather than dally with a woman to whom he might be giving false hopes of a serious relationship.

 

Let me add...if the 'good' woman is well aware it's just a one night stand and no money changes hands, how is she morally superior to the woman who does it to earn a living or even support her family?

 

Since you claim seem to be an expert on all matters sexual, perhaps you can enlighten your audience.

7 minutes ago, Walker88 said:

 

Are you this "Dan" guy?

 

You seem quite invested in this thread, which makes me wonder if you are really Dan.

 

As for your the subject, I am always a bit confused when it comes to sexual morality. Maybe when I'm older I'll be more clear.

 

According to some---and I think you---it is immoral for a woman to be paid for sex, but absolutely okay if she has sex because she's horny. The goodness of one vs the other escapes me. Secondly, a guy who pays for it is a loser, but a guy who sleeps around---often giving women a false impression of genuine affection---is something between a stud muffin and the second coming of the messiah. Apparently we should all applaud him because "he's getting it for free".

 

The "free" part is also a bit confusing. A guy whose real intent is just to bed a woman might take her to a fancy dinner on his dime, using the meal as the beginning act of seduction. He's paying, but just rationalizing. If he simply picks up a woman in a club and goes to his hotel or condo, or even a short time hotel, then he really isn't much of a stud because he is probably her thousandth partner. If he picks up a very inexperienced woman, seduces and beds her, then I suspect he has created a false impression in her that he's serious. Those three have precious little moral difference.

 

Though I admit to having a degree of moral confusion, I think even a genuine stud---the kind of guy who can easily attract a carnal partner---takes a more moral high road if he pays a woman who knows it's merely a business transaction, rather than dally with a woman to whom he might be giving false hopes of a serious relationship.

 

Let me add...if the 'good' woman is well aware it's just a one night stand and no money changes hands, how is she morally superior to the woman who does it to earn a living or even support her family?

 

Since you claim seem to be an expert on all matters sexual, perhaps you can enlighten your audience.

Good post 👍

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