You are the prize! She is not. It's about you, not her. Change your attitude!

[DudleySquat]

I have to question the ability of some to comprehend.  In my OP, I mention both Thai women and families. 

 

That you all recoil at the idea of "good Thai women" tells much about YOU. 

 

Many women have had their businesses devastated by the government's response to the Pandemic. 

 

Some are bouncing back. I know a few of them. 

 

 

[DudleySquat]

2 minutes ago, scottiejohn said:

You need stronger medication or stop taking any sh!t if you are on it!

Are you an MD or a Pharmacist? 

[DudleySquat]

2 minutes ago, parallelman said:

Well, in reply to the OP, IMHO there is no Thai women that comes close to my second (British) wife. From day 1 of the short marriage she put her plan into motion. I did a lot of O/T at work and my bank balance was very healthy indeed. I won't bother with early details but in the final couple of months I was alerted of forged signatures both from a building society and the my bank. She had no previous convictions but had one by the time the divorce was final.

When dating/living with a Thai woman (perhaps with a large age gap) whose financial situation is wanting then we know, or at least think, that it is just an 'arrangement'. But so what! If she takes care of you in old age and she gets 'a few bob' for doing so, then that sounds good to me. Or if the chap is much younger I'm sure he can find love in Thailand and perhaps there are a few on this forum who can vouch to that. (I have no experience with 'same sex' partnerships in Thailand but perhaps some here can comment on that.)

I agree. 

 

There are many women here in their late 30s or early 40s who are beautiful to us but not the Thai men. These lost women are happy to find a foreign man to make them happier than their Thai counterparts.  I have 3 of them. 

 

Through dating apps such as Tinder or Thai Friendly, I found women offering massage, haircuts, and cleaning services. 

 

Good women whom I gladly pay to clean my condo or, in the case of massage, to take care of me twice a week for 2 hours each time. 

 

 

[scottiejohn]

9 minutes ago, DudleySquat said:

Are you an MD or a Pharmacist? 

No but I think you need the former!

[Fat is a type of crazy]

Putting aside money, appearance and age, a reason why some expat types may not be seen as an attractive option is their thinking - their perception of superiority based on not much and their outspokenness and extreme opinions on politics, social issues and world news, culminating in a tendency towards conspiracy theories. Strong opinions that are not open to suggestion. Stubborn. Boring. Not fun for girls who want to have fun.  A fair few of this type. 

[Homburg]

Controversial, post.  Good for generating site traffic.  All ladies are different, some may fit the OP's world view, others may not, some may bring positives to your life, others neutral or even negative, so as Michael Conrad immortally put it, "Let's be careful out there!". 

[Muhendis]

20 hours ago, Walker88 said:

The prototypical 'farang' retiree in Thailand---fat, old, on a meager pension---is hardly a 'prize'. Thirty years ago, maybe he was. Those days are dead and gone.

 

Oh damn.

[jesimps]

22 hours ago, Nick Carter icp said:

 

   That is the impression that you get from frequenting seedy bars .

Outside of bars you cannot have almost anyone , you can only get females who view the relationship as being a job for them .

   Many Females are already in relationships and the younger ones wouldn't want to be in a relationship with an older man .

   You can buy younger females from bars or have a relationship with a divorcee your own age and that's about all you can get 

I agree with what you say. Thailand is full of middle-aged divorcees, a lot of whom are very tasty ladies. I married one of them fifteen years ago and we're still together. 

[NextG]

1 hour ago, scottiejohn said:

That may be the only reason it is posting on here as it provides diddly squat value IMO!

After seeing some of your posts these past few days, it’s definitely a case of the pot calling the kettle black. 

[Gweiloman]

I’ve had a few partners in my life, from hiso to lowly farmer girls, different nationalities. One was some sort of Malay royalty, one made her living as a masseur, probably giving handjobs to her customers to supplement her income. One was British whom I love till today, partly as she’s the mother of my two daughters. I decided to split with the Russian as she lived only for today and didn’t believe in worrying about tomorrow. With another, I built her a 2 million baht house in Isaan which I still see occasionally but don’t step foot into.

 

I’m now with a simple Isaan girl who just about finished high school. My family (siblings) were very concerned that she would cheat me of my money and leave me destitute. This might still happen, after the 10 years we have been together but at least, she  still makes me laugh till today and hasn’t strayed yet. Very importantly, my daughters love her and always take her side. She recently started a business and earns enough to pay for our food (though not my whisky and cigarettes). She’s intending to start a 2nd business to finance my above mentioned nasty habits. I hope she succeeds.

[micmichd]

23 hours ago, FruitPudding said:

Damn right.

 

The type of low class woman who goes for farang, only has two choices:

 

1.  Village bloke

2. Farang

So what?

[kennypowers]

On 1/4/2024 at 11:01 AM, DudleySquat said:

Sinsot or Sinsod? The dowry. Buffalo is sick. Grandma is sick. Grandpa is sick. The dog is diabetic. We have heard it all.  There is a thread going now, and it will return soon enough where the usual weak tell you that there is nothing you can do about it, cave in, bend over, and take it. 

 

YOU ARE THE PRIZE!

 

The lowest-income foreigners are still the prize compared to the life many Thais live. Why forget that you are the prize? 

 

So if you encounter the typical greedy family, who will fleece you if you let them, remember there are millions of women here, and many of them are decent non-sex workers.

 

You can almost have anyone. So be objective. Exercise your power instead of rolling over to please the "family."  Don't get sidetracked. You have the power. You can either use it responsibly or be a mark for the relatives to shear each time it gets cold.

 

I can hear them now, the ankle biters who will be aghast that I just said to use your power, your money to go where and with who will treat you best. 

 

Don't be ashamed you have money. That's one tactic used to separate you. 

 

Remember always, they will take from you until you have nothing. Then, ask them for help.

 

See how sympathetic they are.

 

Thoughts? 

 

 

 

I think there is some truth in this. Over time many foreigners become increasingly subservient to the family, beaten down by the constant guilt requests, as if they are doing you the favour by letting you be part of their toxic enmeshment. The reality is, for many, that when you turned up they had very little, and now they have way more than they ever had, and feel increasingly entitled to it. Yet, they couldn't care less about you, and if you were suddenly up the creek without a paddle, they wouldn't be rushing to the ATM to help you out. It's all about them. So yes, you should recognize your worth, and make sure you get some darn respect for it. 

[bkk6060]

There is too much WWMS here.

Weak Western Male Syndrome.

They let the female control their lives. Brag about their wife or GF handling all the finances or any problems that arise in life.  All seems very weak and naive.

Any man who has been cleaned out here, or is fearful of this happening look in the mirror.  A real man who is smart, knows what's going on, is the boss, and stands up for themselves would never let that happen.

[ozimoron]

1 minute ago, bkk6060 said:

There is too much WWMS here.

Weak Western Male Syndrome.

They let the female control their lives. Brag about their wife or GF handling all the finances or any problems that arise in life.  All seems very weak and naive.

Any man who has been cleaned out here, or is fearful of this happening look in the mirror.  A real man who is smart, knows what's going on, is the boss, and stands up for themselves would never let that happen.

 

Weak males seek submissive women

[animalmagic]

3 hours ago, DudleySquat said:

 

Neither. 

It is an appeal for action. 

 

So sorry for the grammar correction but you asked. 

Interesting, but apologies are not necessary.  Your generous correction of my grammar is a little misguided, as I was using the exact words that you used in response to Gweiloman at 6:13 p.m.  Do try to keep up!

[scorecard]

23 hours ago, DudleySquat said:

It amazes me how you all set the bar.  All the nonsense posters with nothing to say project BETA Male.

 

 Yeah, i'm tough, just ask me, i'll share the details of all the fights I've won including with bar girls., Foodland staff etc.

 

Plus: Buffalo is sick. Grandma is sick. Grandpa is sick. The dog is diabetic.

You get into this 'scene' then run with it, or move on to another more logical 'scene'.

[Caldera]

On 1/4/2024 at 6:01 PM, DudleySquat said:

YOU ARE THE PRIZE!

 

If you're the kind of guy who needs to tell himself that in screaming capital letters, then no, chances are that you aren't. 

[DudleySquat]

6 hours ago, jesimps said:

you can only get females who view the relationship as being a job for them .

 

 

BZZZZZZTTTTTT sorry, you just spoke in absolutes. You can't do this. 

[DudleySquat]

5 hours ago, kennypowers said:

 

I think there is some truth in this. Over time many foreigners become increasingly subservient to the family, beaten down by the constant guilt requests, as if they are doing you the favour by letting you be part of their toxic enmeshment. The reality is, for many, that when you turned up they had very little, and now they have way more than they ever had, and feel increasingly entitled to it. Yet, they couldn't care less about you, and if you were suddenly up the creek without a paddle, they wouldn't be rushing to the ATM to help you out. It's all about them. So yes, you should recognize your worth, and make sure you get some darn respect for it. 

 

 

Congratulations!  You win. You are the only one out of all the flotsam and jetsom ankle biters who all happily ground their axe on my original post. 

 

You get it. 

[DudleySquat]

3 hours ago, Caldera said:

 

If you're the kind of guy who needs to tell himself that in screaming capital letters, then no, chances are that you aren't. 

 

you are the prize!

[spidermike007]

Most women anywhere in the world are looking for financial security, that's just part of the formula, and to deny that is to deny an important reality. Here the bar is set quite a bit lower as their needs are not quite as ridiculous as the needs of the typical Western woman. It is true we do have quite a selection to work with here and I'm not just talking about bar girls and professionals, there are an awful lot of civilians that are interested in a foreign husband for a dozen good reasons.

 

Yes they're not going to be highly educated and yes they're not going to be coming from a successful family and yes you are going to have some financial burdens that you're going to have to deal with, but as long as you set the boundaries and they're within reason it can work. It has worked for many of us. 

[DudleySquat]

7 hours ago, scottiejohn said:

No but I think you need the former!

 

A chemist? What? 

[DudleySquat]

4 hours ago, scorecard said:

 

 Yeah, i'm tough, just ask me, i'll share the details of all the fights I've won including with bar girls., Foodland staff etc.

 

Plus: Buffalo is sick. Grandma is sick. Grandpa is sick. The dog is diabetic.

You get into this 'scene' then run with it, or move on to another more logical 'scene'.

 

You made quite an effort to say nothing. 

 

I need a translation.

[JensenZ]

8 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Most women anywhere in the world are looking for financial security, that's just part of the formula, and to deny that is to deny an important reality. Here the bar is set quite a bit lower as their needs are not quite as ridiculous as the needs of the typical Western woman. It is true we do have quite a selection to work with here and I'm not just talking about bar girls and professionals, there are an awful lot of civilians that are interested in a foreign husband for a dozen good reasons.

 

Yes they're not going to be highly educated and yes they're not going to be coming from a successful family and yes you are going to have some financial burdens that you're going to have to deal with, but as long as you set the boundaries and they're within reason it can work. It has worked for many of us. 

I think you're still living in the dark ages. You talk about a "typical Western woman" being more needy than poor Thai wives with families. In my whole life, all the women I met and had relationships with were independent and I didn't need to support her or her family. The needs of a poor Thai wife and family will eclipse any financial responsibilities back at home for most expats.

[spidermike007]

11 minutes ago, JensenZ said:

I think you're still living in the dark ages. You talk about a "typical Western woman" being more needy than poor Thai wives with families. In my whole life, all the women I met and had relationships with were independent and I didn't need to support her or her family. The needs of a poor Thai wife and family will eclipse any financial responsibilities back at home for most expats.

Alot of my friends have wives that consider it completely normal to go out and spend $1,000 or more on clothing on a given day, who pays that bill? When my woman and I are in Bangkok I give her 2,000 baht and she comes back with some really gorgeous stuff that would have cost 10 times that in the US, so I guess it just depends on how you look at it. 

[save the frogs]

On 1/4/2024 at 6:01 AM, DudleySquat said:

YOU ARE THE PRIZE!

relationships are highly transactional.

one transaction could be time, another could be affection, another could be attention.

but money and things are absolutely a major transaction part of every relationship.

a Big Mac is a monetary transaction. you might pay 300 baht, but not 30,000 baht for a Big Mac.

so decide how much you want to pay.

decide the terms in advance as much as possible.

leave some money for emergency situations.

and if it's consistently more than you're willing to pay, walk out.

 

the inverse is also true. women can and often do walk away when the price is not right. women have a price in mind, which is why I've been turned down by hordes of women. they saw my career and status and weren't interested. and I can't blame them. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[save the frogs]

On 1/4/2024 at 6:01 AM, DudleySquat said:

The dog is diabetic.

ditch the girl and keep the dog.

and take care of it.

and then the girl gets diddly squat from dudley squat

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/5/2024 at 2:40 AM, DudleySquat said:

 

I meet quality women all the time. Perhaps a change of venue for you is needed.

Thanks for the laugh. I needed one.

 

What's your definition of a "quality" woman? One that requires more expensive baubles to put out perhaps? Diamonds usually do the trick, especially one on a gold ring.

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, save the frogs said:

the inverse is also true. women can and often do walk away when the price is not right. women have a price in mind, which is why I've been turned down by hordes of women. they saw my career and status and weren't interested. and I can't blame them. 

 

Oh so very very true. Women saw my car and status ( nurses are paid diddley squat ) and I never even got to the date stage. On the other hand, female nurses are very popular with men, hmmmmmm.

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, spidermike007 said:

Alot of my friends have wives that consider it completely normal to go out and spend $1,000 or more on clothing on a given day, who pays that bill? When my woman and I are in Bangkok I give her 2,000 baht and she comes back with some really gorgeous stuff that would have cost 10 times that in the US, so I guess it just depends on how you look at it. 

You must live on a different stratosphere from myself. I don't know anyone that could give their ( non working ) wife $1,000 to spend on clothes.

As for my Thai wife, I occasionally bought a 300 baht dress for her, but the idea of handing over 2,000 baht "just because" would have been a sick joke.

 

I guess being a nurse was the real sick joke when I could have been the one handing over $1000 to a trophy wife.