Ten Things You Will Never Hear In Thailand.........

[pastitche]

Yes, but what team do you support in the Thai league?

Is that rugby league? I'm trying to find a club for the 8-year old. 147cms and 59.5kgs. Big girl

[arthurwait]

Lets walk.

[arthurwait]

Yes I understand a disco is meant to have a dance floor.

[arthurwait]

Falang - I should probably learn to read Thai as all the Thai I know is actually complete <deleted>.

[StreetCowboy]

Yes, but what team do you support in the Thai league?

Is that rugby league? I'm trying to find a club for the 8-year old. 147cms and 59.5kgs. Big girl

Good job! I was trying to bring the thread round to rugby league, but thought "softly, softly, catch the monkey..."

[necronx99]

Yes, but what team do you support in the Thai league?

Is that rugby league? I'm trying to find a club for the 8-year old. 147cms and 59.5kgs. Big girl

Good job! I was trying to bring the thread round to rugby league, but thought "softly, softly, catch the monkey..."

Sonny Bill's agent (while on holiday in Soi Katoey) - Sonny doesn't care about the money, he plays for the love of the game.

[patroller]

This one is hilarious whoever posted it...

Farang - my wife is dumb as dirt, but she can suck the Chrome of a trailer hitch.

[Payboy]

You forgot the Brit's....

I'm going to the dentist.

[Fookhaht]

Waiter: We apologize for the insensitivity of putting a roll of toilet paper directly in front of your dinner.

Manager: We apologize for the lack of toilet paper in our restroom. Just grab one from the nearest customer's table on your way to the loo.

[beerchang]

Thai driver to mates in car..."Hey lads, I gotta turn left so i'm gonna use the indicator"

[beerchang]

Mates toThai driver..."NO NO you're only 50 metres away. Should have put it on a kilometre away"

Oops! Sorry. It should be something you wouldn't hear!

[benbear]

Thai bar girl = I am not wearing high heel shoes.

Thai (chang / singha) waitress = I am really not interested in you at all, just buy some beer and *&** off

Foreigner = It's really cold today, I think it might even snow in April

Foreigner = Isn't that bar girl over there really ugly, I mean really horrible.

Me at school at 12 o'clock with nothing to do = I am not going to sneak out the gates so I can have lunch at soi 2, I am going to stay here untill 4.

[henryalleman]

40- Any Thai: I'm not hungry.

[dean999]

^{Security guard at BTS,"Yes sir, you can take those ballons on the train."}

[necronx99]

^{Security guard at BTS,"Yes sir, you can take those ballons on the train."}

Bad Dean, Bad!

But nice rack.

[Payboy]

^{Security guard at BTS,"Yes sir, you can take those ballons on the train."}

Bad Dean, Bad!

But nice rack.

Oh, you mean those balloons.

[wana]

^{Security guard at BTS}: i wouldnt use the metal detector on someones head if a situation arose !

[StreetCowboy]

^{Security guard at BTS}: i wouldnt use the metal detector on someones head if a situation arose !

Was his head metal? Did it clang like Oor Wullie's bucket?

Only that security guard knows for sure...

[theblether]

Foreigner = Isn't that bar girl over there really ugly, I mean really horrible.

I'm not going with that one, I've seen some real pigs in knickers working in bars.

Unfortunately drinking a bottle of whisky has a habit of beautifying them.

[IanForbes]

Foreigner = Isn't that bar girl over there really ugly, I mean really horrible.

I'm not going with that one, I've seen some real pigs in knickers working in bars.

Unfortunately drinking a bottle of whisky has a habit of beautifying them.

Not being much of a drinking man, I can agree with you. There are thousands of bar girls who should be working in factories instead. There's not one in 5 that are even worth looking at, and even those aren't something you want to be seen with in daylight. Maybe I'm just too fussy, but if I am paying the freight then I get to choose the merchandise. I can't recall going home with a fat one yet.

[StreetCowboy]

Foreigner = Isn't that bar girl over there really ugly, I mean really horrible.

I'm not going with that one, I've seen some real pigs in knickers working in bars.

Unfortunately drinking a bottle of whisky has a habit of beautifying them.

Not being much of a drinking man, I can agree with you. There are thousands of bar girls who should be working in factories instead. There's not one in 5 that are even worth looking at, and even those aren't something you want to be seen with in daylight. Maybe I'm just too fussy, but if I am paying the freight then I get to choose the merchandise. I can't recall going home with a fat one yet.

I dread to speculate on what I might not remember...

[canuckamuck]

I think it takes time for for the brighter ones to understand that their days under the "beggars can't be choosers rule" doesn't apply to the bar scene in LOS. And obviously a majority og them never figure it out at all.

[F1fanatic]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

[StreetCowboy]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

I'm sure I have heard that...

SC

Edit: To be honest, I thought you all did a good job not getting bogged down in the details of NZ rugby league

[theblether]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

Fair point........we'll behave ourselves.

[beerchang]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

Fair point........we'll behave ourselves.

That's the best 'thing you wouldn't hear yet!!!!!

[theblether]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

Fair point........we'll behave ourselves.

That's the best 'thing you wouldn't hear yet!!!!!

Yes yes.......I'm an unconscious comedian

I'm glad you noticed

[benbear]

Thai guy = I will never use the word Farang ever again

If you can beat this, I'll be shocked

[beerchang]

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

Fair point........we'll behave ourselves.

That's the best 'thing you wouldn't hear yet!!!!!

Yes yes.......I'm an unconscious comedian

I'm glad you noticed

[dean999]

Thai guy = I will never use the word Farang ever again

If you can beat this, I'll be shocked

Some TV members - Falang is not a bad word and i love being called it.

Any good?