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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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Paddy and Mick were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.

A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Paddy, "but we don't have a ladder."

The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement, announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.

Mick shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! 

 

We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!"
 

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 I'm not saying the wife is stupid but if she took a blood test she would fail it.

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When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school to train as a nurse. At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange the letters

‘PNEIS’

and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered ‘SPINE’ are walking the hospital wards. 

The others are now street walkers!

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The female caretaker in my office block asked whether I would hang out with her and smoke marijuana....

I said no, I can’t deal with a high maintenance woman...

A post in poor taste has been removed

Arnold Judas Rimmer of Jupiter Mining Corporation Ship Red Dwarf

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Was always wondering what those red buckets at the pump were for...

 

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 and ...if you don't stop lying...

 

May be an image of 1 person and text that says 'If you don' stop lying You'll grow up to be a Fact Checker for Face Book'

 

 

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