Why do Thais recommend divorced women with children to farang?

[KhaoYai]

1 hour ago, digger70 said:

Why do Thais recommend divorced women with children to farang? 

 

Why? Because the Thai Men Don't Want them.   ????

I don't think its so much that Thai men don't want them, I think its that Thai men don't want the responsibility of bringing up a kid.

 

But what is to be expected of a society where having a Mia Noi (or 2) comes from the very top?

[xtrnuno41]

Nothing to do with Thai, happens everywhere.

 

[KhaoYai]

24 minutes ago, Kiujunn said:

Every TG "knows" that farangs have wife and kids in farangland. They are happy to ignore it as long as they get money. 

There will be some yes, but I think you are over-playing that.  The vast amount of farangs that I know with Thai wives, only have an EX wife and kids in their home country. 

[thecyclist]

Most Thais think that farangs are idiots. How many times have I heard ' farang ngo' 

[The Theory]

15 hours ago, KhaoYai said:

Neither did I say anything about sluts. You people read too fast and read extra words in.

You take it easy, 

He is part of the Matrix now ????????

[The Theory]

19 hours ago, ZhangYimou said:

Has anyone else noticed this pattern

Don't expect satisfactory replies since you seem to be "Neo" and those who are already connected to the "Matrix" will not agree with you.???? The Matrix controls all opinions. ????

[SunsetT]

19 hours ago, ZhangYimou said:

they think that farangs are all a bunch of  losers

Firstly re. question: Duuuuuhhhh!

 

 

Secondly: So in  your eyes any man who marries a divorcee with a child is a loser?

[Seeall]

18 hours ago, NorthernRyland said:

Because they know we're suckers and don't know any better.

yes, hard up <deleted> livin in their moms basements

[Seeall]

10 hours ago, welovesundaysatspace said:

How many have you met personally in order to come to such conclusion? I actually work with quite some kids from big families, including the very big ones. I haven’t dated any of them, but they’re far from being “vain spoilt airheads”. Most have been incredibly polite, hard-working, polished, well educated, smart and eager to learn. The biggest issue is that they don’t work because of the money; they drive their own or one of daddy’s S class when they come to work. They work because they want to learn and gain experience and get a brand name into their CV, so you need to give them interesting stuff to work on otherwise they move on. On the other hand, that’s an issue even with kids who aren’t part of the 1%. The market for very well-educated Thais is small, so they all have their options. 

blah blah ok

[Seeall]

13 hours ago, mr mr said:

 

can we all just agree that westen men and thai men generally see beauty in a much different light ? i don't see it  as ignorance i simply see it as preference. beauty in  the eye of the beholder and all that.  

no idedea what ur saying

[blacksuitdandruff]

19 hours ago, Lacessit said:

Allow me to observe there are quite a few rural village girls who are just as good-looking as any Hi-So. My GF's daughter is an absolute stunner.

There does seem to be a division of chaste vs promiscuous girls in the rural villages, some families are quite strict. My GF was a virgin when she got married at age 23, had the daughter two years later. So they are not all sluts.

I tend to agree Thais view Thai women who are with farangs as spoiled goods. Doesn't worry me, just another indication of their narrow-minded thinking. Plenty of Western men here who are very happy to be pampered by their Thai wives and GF's, me included.

As far as becoming a mia noi to a multimillionaire goes, IMO demand would far outstrip the multi-millionaire supply.

 

A woman with children will always be valued less than a woman without children in general society.   Them being sluts is immaterial to the narrow mindedness of society.   Just live the life you have and take it as it comes instead of justifying. 

 

Side note...

Divorced woman with children should give tom lesbians a chance...ultimate solution for two social problems. 

[473geo]

3 hours ago, thecyclist said:

Most Thais think that farangs are idiots. How many times have I heard ' farang ngo' 

Problem is many farangs appear to have great difficulty proving otherwise!!

[SW Happy]

15 hours ago, scorecard said:

 

Let's not forget the long-term solid Thai social 'rule' that men don't accept the existing children of girls/ladies they meet.

 

Why? Because 'they don't have the male partners blood'. Their blood is not the same as the master of the house., therefore the GFs children cannot live in the house.

 

90+ % of Thais follow this thinking, common also in Cambodia, Lao and Myanmar.

 

This is another reason why so many Thai kids live with grandma and in many cases ahave never been to the house where their birth mother now lives and know they are not welcome.

 

On the other hand the majority of western men (I think this is true) readily accept that their new GF has kids and she should remain strongly in their lives, and therefore accept her kids into their daily lives and into their house, accept responsibility for their welfare. education etc., and often become very good step-fathers. 

 

One of my professor buddies in Bkk met a female professor at his uni and they quickly formed a happy relationship. She speaks advanced English, lovely pleasant and intelligent young lady, never asked for anything.. 

 

She had  kids from a previous marriage with a Thai man,  2.5 yo and 5 yo. The lady professor informed my buddy she had kids as soon as they met.

 

The farang made it clear he wanted to meet her kids and get to know them, this happened quickly, the kids bonded with the farang quickly and were young enough to quickly pick up plenty of English.

 

Two years later they married and the kids featured in the ceremony and the wedding celebrations.

 

The lady professors elder brother made it plain from day 1 that the couple met that the kids had to be split up & each one go to live with a grandmother. 

 

Farang insisted this not happen and a few months before the wedding bought a new house with enough bedrooms for the two kids to each have their own very comfortable rooms, a shared bathroom, some electronics etc., and the kids (suggested/prompted by the farang and accepted by their mother) had been moved into better schools. They all moved into the new house a month or so before the wedding.

 

The day after the wedding the farang came home to a severe argument between his new wife and her elder brother who had arrived at the house, rounded up the 2 kids and demanded they each go to their rooms with big black plastic bags to gather up their clothes etc. Their mother was telling them 'you are not moving anywhere, this is your home, our family home'.

 

Both kids ran to the farang and clung onto him and with lots of crying said they didn't want to leave the house. 

 

Farang called a Thai lawyer friend and his wife called the police.

 

The police arrived first and tried to tell the farang that his wifes' brother was correct by Thai law, the kids could not stay there.

 

Lawyer arrived soon after and quickly demanded that both the police and the older brother quote the supposed Thai law which states that they could not live in the new house because their blood was not the same as the new husband'.

 

Both police and older brother couldn't quote any such law. Lawyer demanded the phone number of the senior the 2 cops reported to and lawyer called him. Senior arrived at the house 10 minutes later and got very angry with his 2 junior cops telling them 'you've been told before there is no such law and that you cannot make up laws'.

 

Senior cops spoke some English, he told the farang 'you are not breaking any laws, and I'm happy to see that the 2 children and being well taken care of'. '

 

Senior cop then spoke strongly to the older brother and made him confirm that he now understood there is no such law, then told the farang 'if you have any further problems please call me' and gave his card and mobile no. 

 

 

Great outcome.????

[ChaiyaTH]

Very simple: They would be out of the loop for Thai guys so a foreigner is a last possible option you would then try your luck on. But IMO it is as silly for a foreigner to take one with kids already, specially with endless options here.

Edited December 27, 2020 by ChaiyaTH

[scorecard]

17 hours ago, welovesundaysatspace said:

Would you entertain a dirty Thai (or Farang) woman? 
 

Thais and Farangs are really not that different in this context: No one wants to date someone of (much) lower value unless he’s really desperate. 
 

I know a lot of Thai women “up the social scale”. I am not talking about middle class women who are paying off a second hand Honda Civic and a studio room in an LPN condo out in Bang Na. None of them has kids. Only one I know has been married before and she’s still an absolute catch. 

Many of them are single because they just cannot find a proper guy in their league. The common theme I hear is that there just aren’t enough proper men after you remove all the gays, ladyboys, men of lower status, and cheating and abusive guys from the dating pool. Some actually turn to tomboys. I have at least two of such relationships in my circle of friends now. 

Only a few of those women would categorically rule out dating a western man; in fact, quite some of them have been or are dating western men. What those Western men have in common is that they are of equal or similar status. You can be offended by that, but then again I’m asking whether you would date someone who’s much lower than your own status? 
 

On the other hand, I was also surprised to hear how many of these successful young women like to fool around themselves. It seems to be common for many to keep their options open and always look for something better when they’re below 30 or so, which may include having several guys or kik at the same time. Sadly, some will then end up with nothing in the end, because they’ve played too long and let too many options pass. 

 

 

Same comments can apply to both men and women from every country.

[scorecard]

5 hours ago, ChaiyaTH said:

Very simple: They would be out of the loop for Thai guys so a foreigner is a last possible option you would then try your luck on. But IMO it is as silly for a foreigner to take one with kids already, specially with endless options here.

Surely on a subject like this each to their own.

[hotchilli]

On 12/27/2020 at 2:41 AM, ZhangYimou said:

I only notice this behavior in Thailand.

In a word, sponsorship.

[ChipButty]

6 minutes ago, hotchilli said:

In a word, sponsorship.

I knew a girl had 5 of them, sponsors 

[Elkski]

Farangia.  Haha. 

If you think most thai women start having sex at 16 your hanging in low places.

I've met 2 thai women who were virgins over 40.  I've met several over 40 who only had 1 or 2 man ever.  I have met more conservative over 40 in Thailand than in the west. 

I've met many thai women who got dumped by somchi with the kid(s) at midv30's for a 20 something.  I only know 1 mom who got support from from her ex . This one thai man supported her and children well. 

I've met many thai women who think most thai men smoke, drink to mut, gamble,  like mia nois, giks, abuse and they will not consider another thai man.   Quite often thai women have friends or see happy thai women on FB who have amazing lives with a western man.  Also there is the thought of having a beautiful  Lukkreung  child.  Look at all the TV stars and models.   They all want a western nose,, height,And light skin  I despise all this plastic  surgery.  The Micheal Jackson noses and anime look is so sad.  How will these pretties look when they are 50?   

A newbie western guy can be a great catch. 

[ChrisKC]

13 hours ago, Seeall said:

no idedea what ur saying

For someone who has "seeall" as an id, I am surprised you don't understand!

[Brickbat]

Thai men generally won’t accept another man’s kids. And why would they? There are just so many single women here. And then there’s the matter of looking good. And money! The biggie!  

[Sparx60]

After reading all comments with regard to single mothers in Thailand, I would like to add my two bob on the subject.

   After two failed marriages I was so disillusioned I gave up on women -for about 4 years. Then, after finding on internet about good and reasonably cheap dental services in Bangkok, I  decided to spend a couple of weeks there and get my choppers fixed. Prior to this I joined the megafriends.com where I met a homely and reasonably attractive  farmer lady from Ayutthaya 38 y.o. with sons 20 and 22 y.o. Her  message at megafriends  portrayed her photo where it was obvious she was struggling to pose, and the message said: " My name is S....I live in Ayutthaya, I have house, 2 sons, 15 cows, 6 dogs and  a cat. I would like to meet a man to love me and I will love him forever. Amongst a number of the most attractive Thai ladies, well dressed and well presented, this one, for some reason, got my attention. The phone conversation with her was rather difficult because of her poor English, but I believed she understood when I will be in Bangkok and in which hotel I will be staying. She said she will be there at 7pm on particular date. I explained to her that, as she enters the hotel, there will be 2 computers for general use not far from entrance and I will be using one on left side.

   Just before 7pm someone vacated the computer I was going to use and I sat down and started browsing the internet, enjoying a glass of Singha. A short while later, I got a tap on my shoulder and there stood a lady casually dressed, with unruly hair and gorgeous smile. "Hello", she said, "my name is 

S..... The usual Thai greeting followed. It was hard to describe my feelings at this moment after years of celibacy and total contempt for the opposite sex.

  The next day we went to Ayutthaya to her house where I met her sons and uncle who lived with her. Her mother lived up north at Ban Nong Hoi.

   This was back in October 2005. Took some time to organize her visit to Australia for 3 months, she went back home 3 after her welcome expired later and was back Down Under on the 12th December 2006 under marriage visa. On the 18th of December she got a job in local shop and at the end of January 2007 she got an ABN and worked with me as my offsider on construction site. We married in April 2007 and worked together as sub-contractors till the projects completion which was at the end of the year. After that she got employed with local shire and I also got a salaried job with a local company so we are doing fine. Where we live Covid is non-existent which is a big plus. 

   I strongly believe that meeting this lady was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Because of my desire to retire in Thailand we both invested into real estate for rental purposes and bought a block of land, about 24 rai which we turned into a farm with sheds, cows and sheep, 2 solar water pumps, built a large house for the whole family and created employment for all of them. The house will have a 12.5 KW grid-connected solar system installed after covid lets us go back, whenever that may be.

   At  a recent public discussion, a question was asked about what is the difference between FINISHED and COMPLETED. An Indian bloke got a standing ovation for his answer: " If you marry a wrong woman, your life will be  finished, but if you marry a right one, your life will be completed. However, if the right woman catches you with a wrong one, your life will be TOTALY FINISHED. Cheers and a Happy New Year to all.

   

    

[EdrigoSalvadore]

17 minutes ago, Sparx60 said:

After reading all comments with regard to single mothers in Thailand, I would like to add my two bob on the subject.

   After two failed marriages I was so disillusioned I gave up on women -for about 4 years. Then, after finding on internet about good and reasonably cheap dental services in Bangkok, I  decided to spend a couple of weeks there and get my choppers fixed. Prior to this I joined the megafriends.com where I met a homely and reasonably attractive  farmer lady from Ayutthaya 38 y.o. with sons 20 and 22 y.o. Her  message at megafriends  portrayed her photo where it was obvious she was struggling to pose, and the message said: " My name is S....I live in Ayutthaya, I have house, 2 sons, 15 cows, 6 dogs and  a cat. I would like to meet a man to love me and I will love him forever. Amongst a number of the most attractive Thai ladies, well dressed and well presented, this one, for some reason, got my attention. The phone conversation with her was rather difficult because of her poor English, but I believed she understood when I will be in Bangkok and in which hotel I will be staying. She said she will be there at 7pm on particular date. I explained to her that, as she enters the hotel, there will be 2 computers for general use not far from entrance and I will be using one on left side.

   Just before 7pm someone vacated the computer I was going to use and I sat down and started browsing the internet, enjoying a glass of Singha. A short while later, I got a tap on my shoulder and there stood a lady casually dressed, with unruly hair and gorgeous smile. "Hello", she said, "my name is 

S..... The usual Thai greeting followed. It was hard to describe my feelings at this moment after years of celibacy and total contempt for the opposite sex.

  The next day we went to Ayutthaya to her house where I met her sons and uncle who lived with her. Her mother lived up north at Ban Nong Hoi.

   This was back in October 2005. Took some time to organize her visit to Australia for 3 months, she went back home 3 after her welcome expired later and was back Down Under on the 12th December 2006 under marriage visa. On the 18th of December she got a job in local shop and at the end of January 2007 she got an ABN and worked with me as my offsider on construction site. We married in April 2007 and worked together as sub-contractors till the projects completion which was at the end of the year. After that she got employed with local shire and I also got a salaried job with a local company so we are doing fine. Where we live Covid is non-existent which is a big plus. 

   I strongly believe that meeting this lady was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Because of my desire to retire in Thailand we both invested into real estate for rental purposes and bought a block of land, about 24 rai which we turned into a farm with sheds, cows and sheep, 2 solar water pumps, built a large house for the whole family and created employment for all of them. The house will have a 12.5 KW grid-connected solar system installed after covid lets us go back, whenever that may be.

   At  a recent public discussion, a question was asked about what is the difference between FINISHED and COMPLETED. An Indian bloke got a standing ovation for his answer: " If you marry a wrong woman, your life will be  finished, but if you marry a right one, your life will be completed. However, if the right woman catches you with a wrong one, your life will be TOTALY FINISHED. Cheers and a Happy New Year to all.

   

    

Beautiful story. Happy to read it. I wish that she will love you forever. 15 cows, makes it soundslike you were the gold digger in this case!

[thecyclist]

It's not just Thai women with kids:I have heard it from really dark-skinned girls. I am dam dam, Thai guys don't like me, I 'd better find myself a farang husband. And Thai guys often ask me why farangs like ugly women. 555

[Dart12]

might it be that men here are also fishing 15 years or more their junior and are no longer (if ever) catches themselves that they are more willing to take on children?

I also keep hearing "rich" farang.  Seems like oxymoron more times than not haha.  but I guess all things are relative ????

[BritManToo]

34 minutes ago, Dart12 said:

might it be that men here are also fishing 15 years or more their junior and are no longer (if ever) catches themselves that they are more willing to take on children?

I also keep hearing "rich" farang.  Seems like oxymoron more times than not haha.  but I guess all things are relative ????

i wasn't a catch when I was 18, am even less a catch at 65.

 

As for rich,

When many Thais are finding it hard to get a wage of 9,000bht/month (6 days work a week) my Brit OAP of 150pounds/week (0 days work a week) makes me look rich.

 

I look even richer in Cambodia/Philippines/Vietnam.

Edited December 28, 2020 by BritManToo

[Dart12]

14 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

i wasn't a catch when I was 18, am even less a catch at 65.

 

As for rich,

When many Thais are finding it hard to get a wage of 9,000bht/month (6 days work a week) my Brit OAP of 150pounds/week (0 days work a week) makes me look rich.

 

I look even richer in Cambodia/Philippines/Vietnam.

I've read a few of your posts over the past 9 months...you seem to do just fine lol.  I thought you were younger than 65 though, but a sign of what you can do if you keep physically active.

 

Rich?  as I said...all things are relative though.

I remember way back when working for $10 an hour at a <deleted> job and someone found out what I was making and basically gushed and begged to learn how to get hired as if it were a dream scenario.

All depends on where you are in life, and what you see as your ceiling or at least graspable one day.  Nothing wrong with that either.  

Happiness is happiness no matter the shape or configuration.

Edited December 28, 2020 by Dart12

[spidermike007]

On 12/27/2020 at 9:33 AM, scorecard said:

 

Let's not forget the long-term solid Thai social 'rule' that men don't accept the existing children of girls/ladies they meet.

 

Why? Because 'they don't have the male partners blood'. Their blood is not the same as the master of the house., therefore the GFs children cannot live in the house.

 

90+ % of Thais follow this thinking, common also in Cambodia, Lao and Myanmar.

 

This is another reason why so many Thai kids live with grandma and in many cases ahave never been to the house where their birth mother now lives and know they are not welcome.

 

On the other hand the majority of western men (I think this is true) readily accept that their new GF has kids and she should remain strongly in their lives, and therefore accept her kids into their daily lives and into their house, accept responsibility for their welfare. education etc., and often become very good step-fathers. 

 

One of my professor buddies in Bkk met a female professor at his uni and they quickly formed a happy relationship. She speaks advanced English, lovely pleasant and intelligent young lady, never asked for anything.. 

 

She had  kids from a previous marriage with a Thai man,  2.5 yo and 5 yo. The lady professor informed my buddy she had kids as soon as they met.

 

The farang made it clear he wanted to meet her kids and get to know them, this happened quickly, the kids bonded with the farang quickly and were young enough to quickly pick up plenty of English.

 

Two years later they married and the kids featured in the ceremony and the wedding celebrations.

 

The lady professors elder brother made it plain from day 1 that the couple met that the kids had to be split up & each one go to live with a grandmother. 

 

Farang insisted this not happen and a few months before the wedding bought a new house with enough bedrooms for the two kids to each have their own very comfortable rooms, a shared bathroom, some electronics etc., and the kids (suggested/prompted by the farang and accepted by their mother) had been moved into better schools. They all moved into the new house a month or so before the wedding.

 

The day after the wedding the farang came home to a severe argument between his new wife and her elder brother who had arrived at the house, rounded up the 2 kids and demanded they each go to their rooms with big black plastic bags to gather up their clothes etc. Their mother was telling them 'you are not moving anywhere, this is your home, our family home'.

 

Both kids ran to the farang and clung onto him and with lots of crying said they didn't want to leave the house. 

 

Farang called a Thai lawyer friend and his wife called the police.

 

The police arrived first and tried to tell the farang that his wifes' brother was correct by Thai law, the kids could not stay there.

 

Lawyer arrived soon after and quickly demanded that both the police and the older brother quote the supposed Thai law which states that they could not live in the new house because their blood was not the same as the new husband'.

 

Both police and older brother couldn't quote any such law. Lawyer demanded the phone number of the senior the 2 cops reported to and lawyer called him. Senior arrived at the house 10 minutes later and got very angry with his 2 junior cops telling them 'you've been told before there is no such law and that you cannot make up laws'.

 

Senior cops spoke some English, he told the farang 'you are not breaking any laws, and I'm happy to see that the 2 children and being well taken care of'. '

 

Senior cop then spoke strongly to the older brother and made him confirm that he now understood there is no such law, then told the farang 'if you have any further problems please call me' and gave his card and mobile no. 

 

 

 

Wow. Great story. Thanks for that. Talk about a glimpse into a cultural gap. For us, it just sounds like an astonishing degree of ignorance, convention, conservatism, and closed mindedness. Coupled with an astonishing lack of compassion and kindness, and a pathological fear of a loss of face, on the part of the horrific elder brother. 

 

I sure hope the "insipid elder brother" is not invited to family functions, and iced out of their lives. He sounds like he serves no useful purpose anyway, and is not much of an example for the kids. And the kids likely despise him, for good reason. 

 

The citation of a law here, or lack thereof, can be quite effective. And kudos to the senior cop for his humanity and reason. Likewise, kudos to his wife, for standing up to her stunningly ignorant and immoral brother. 

 

If I was in the husbands position, I would have gotten in the brother's face afterwards, and explained to him he is NEVER welcome in the house, nor is he permitted to even talk to the kids, after pulling a juvenile and nasty stunt like that. See ya! Good riddens. Uncle no more! 

Edited December 28, 2020 by spidermike007

[claynlr]

On 12/27/2020 at 7:03 AM, KhaoYai said:

Boy, you ain't been around.

 

And by the way, I'm not painting any bad pictures - my wife was a single mother.  I am simply saying that I have never known anywhere else with as many single mums.  The usual story is that as soon as a girl gets pregnant, the Thai boyfriend legs it.

Mine too Khao...my area is full of single moms(16) then talk to any lady working in a bar, they all have babies with no father, my question is will this ever change? Doubtful 

[Banana7]

23 hours ago, xylophone said:

I chased after my girlfriend here because she was attractive and although she couldn't speak much English she seemed bright enough, and was keen to learn English, this especially as she had had a university education (accounting), so we got on well.

 

She told me she had a daughter by a previous "marriage" so we went up to see her in the village near Phitsanulok and she was living with grandma and, in my opinion, was not being well cared for, because grandma was old and let the young girl run around as she wanted.

 

Anyway I suggested to the girlfriend that we bought her back to Patong and that she lived with us, which turned out to be a great idea.

 

She came to live with us when she was about seven and now she is 20 years old and very attractive, well mannered and loving daughter, whom I have taken care of since that time, even though her mother and I have parted company (but still on good terms).

 

So meeting a girl with a child, has been a bonus for me as I now have a "daughter" who is in constant touch with me as I am putting her through university, and who loves me to bits, as I do her.

That's an interesting story. I wonder if the daughter would love you so dearly if you didn't provide financial support or "take care" of her? Are you sure she loves you, or does she love your money and its free flow for her benefit?