The 4 letter word called "love".

[swissie]

As can be expected, a great many threads revolve around "love". But what is it? Nothing but a series of chemical/electrical interactions in the brain, triggered by a concoction of some hormones. That's all!

The ultimate trick by nature, making sure that a certain species multiplies and doesn't go extinct. Nature doesn't know about "romance". A sobering realization, isn't it? Worst of all, in this impaired state of mind, "bad decisions" are likely to be made. = Love makes blind.

The moral of the story: Use caution if you feel that "the love bug" is sneaking up on you. Keep your cool and take a cold shower. Remember that "love" is overrated, after all it's just another 4 letter word. Stay with sex only. That way you can reighn in the "tricks of nature" to a certain degree, thus avoiding repetitious heart wrenching "love" roller coaster rides.

[Kadilo]

Did you get dumped then?

[chalawaan]

Everybody nods their head, but system glitch, the message got sent to the wrong head.

[swissie]

4 minutes ago, Kadilo said:

Did you get dumped then?

I got dumped and I dumped. Like most of us. = The "love roller coaster"

[clivebaxter]

Love is the extra effort you make with people you don't like- Quentin Crisp

[Dmaxdan]

Always follow your heart.... but don't forget to along your brain...

[swissie]

13 minutes ago, chalawaan said:

Everybody nods their head, but system glitch, the message got sent to the wrong head.

That sails under "the tricks of nature".

[david555]

20 minutes ago, swissie said:

I got dumped and I dumped. Like most of us. = The "love roller coaster"

And still not vaccinated against it by "natural brain-way" ?? 

Edited September 21, 2021 by david555

[zzaa09]

Love doesn't exist. 

Pretend that it might, though.

[473geo]

There are people who don't enjoy the roller coaster?

Essential part of the fun of life ????

 

[2 is 1]

LOve is for kids and people who's IQ is under 100! Different is how you "love" your own kids, that is real love!

Edited September 21, 2021 by 2 is 1

[bobandyson]

What is love? Ask 100 people and you'll get 200 different answers.

 

[bobandyson]

52 minutes ago, chalawaan said:

Everybody nods their head, but system glitch, the message got sent to the wrong head.

As many people have told me, "There's a fine line between love and lust."

 

[olfu]

24 minutes ago, 2 is 1 said:

LOve is for kids and people who's IQ is under 100! Different is how you "love" your own kids, that is real love!

You mean after DNA test or before?

[2 is 1]

2 minutes ago, olfu said:

You mean after DNA test or before?

So you mean people cant love kids and call them own whitout biology bond? You know people even  adopt kids and i think love them also!

[Moonlover]

Love is dogs that stick by you no matter what and cats that purr.

[Tanomazu]

The basis for love was pair bonding. Because romantic love could only be invented and thrive on the basis of pair bonding.

 

In terms of time pair bonding longe preceded love. At the very start human society was highly promiscuous, both male and female, and males had to engage in physical combat to ensure sexual access to females. This is seen in many primate societies like Bonobos, Chimpanzees. However, in those primate societies we also see that the non-dominant males resorted to a trick to gain sexual access to females, they offered them food in return for sex. The same happened in human society. However, when another male swooped in and "stole" a pregnancy, obviously the provisioning was a lost investment. Thus human beta males developed the concept of fidelity and pair bonding was born.

 

This not only reduced the injuries by males, time invested in male competition, but also allowed those males to be sure of their offspring and to invest more time in their rearing. Thus the family was born.

 

We should always remember that primates are naturally promiscuous and that love is an artificial construct, as is pair bonding, which was invented by males who were defeated in male on male competition.

 

There is very little reason today, apart from culture, religion, media and convention, for women to adhere to the fidelity principle implicit in pair bonding, because provisioning is done by employers and the state for females now.

 

Indeed with divorce, breaking the fidelity principle is economically rewarded for females. This will no doubt further erode the fidelity principle in modern times.

 

https://www.pnas.org/content/109/25/9923

Edited September 21, 2021 by Tanomazu

[CharlieH]

No such thing ! Its a vicious rumor.

 

Its lust, initially, followed by nothing but a bad habit bordering on addiction. ????

 

[StreetCowboy]

14 minutes ago, Tanomazu said:

The basis for love was pair bonding. Because romantic love could only be invented and thrive on the basis of pair bonding.

 

In terms of time pair bonding longe preceded love. At the very start human society was highly promiscuous, both male and female, and males had to engage in physical combat to ensure sexual access to females. This is seen in many primate societies like Bonobos, Chimpanzees. However, in those primate societies we also see that the non-dominant males resorted to a trick to gain sexual access to females, they offered them food in return for sex. The same happened in human society. However, when another male swooped in and "stole" a pregnancy, obviously the provisioning was a lost investment. Thus human beta males developed the concept of fidelity and pair bonding was born.

 

This not only reduced the injuries by males, time invested in male competition, but also allowed those males to be sure of their offspring and to invest more time in their rearing. Thus the family was born.

 

We should always remember that primates are naturally promiscuous and that love is an artificial construct, as is pair bonding, which was invented by males who were defeated in male on male competition.

 

There is very little reason today, apart from culture, religion, media and convention, for women to adhere to the fidelity principle implicit in pair bonding, because provisioning is done by employers and the state for females now.

 

Indeed with divorce, breaking the fidelity principle is economically rewarded for females. This will no doubt further erode the fidelity principle in modern times.

 

https://www.pnas.org/content/109/25/9923

Not bonobos, according to the last documentary trailer that I watched

[Tanomazu]

3 minutes ago, StreetCowboy said:

Not bonobos, according to the last documentary trailer that I watched

You mean Bonobos are not promiscuous?

[StreetCowboy]

1 minute ago, Tanomazu said:

You mean Bonobos are not promiscuous?

They're not impressed by bullies

 

[Tanomazu]

1 minute ago, StreetCowboy said:

They're not impressed by bullies

 

Okay, because they're highly promiscuous.

[1FinickyOne]

41 minutes ago, bobandyson said:

As many people have told me, "There's a fine line between love and lust."

The way I heard it is that there is a fine line between a numerator and denominator... 

[1FinickyOne]

love is brief periods of blind euphoria... 

[LennyW]

The word you are looking for is "Loot" not love, it is the foundation of every relationship...all around the world!

[thaibeachlovers]

7 hours ago, swissie said:

I got dumped and I dumped. Like most of us. = The "love roller coaster"

Indeed. I agree with your OP, but we all think ( at some stage of our life ) that we NEED "love". I think Prince Charles said it best in relation to Diana  when he said "Whatever 'in love' means."

 

We all hate being dumped, and IMO the worst part is that we often don't know WHY? Sometimes we work it out years later.

I'm sorry to say that I too have been a dumper, and didn't tell them why either, but that was long ago when I didn't know much of anything, if that is an excuse.

Sometimes perhaps, the truth would be even more hurtful than not knowing. I told my ex partner that I was leaving her because of her children, but would she have preferred being told I was dumping her because she had become an intolerant, using, nasty, monstrous <deleted> and losing everything to be rid of her was "worth it" to not have to be around her anymore?

Edited September 21, 2021 by thaibeachlovers

[thaibeachlovers]

It's on threads like this I miss Britman2. He always had something insightful to add about the "insanity" we describe as "love".

[thaibeachlovers]

6 hours ago, 2 is 1 said:

So you mean people cant love kids and call them own whitout biology bond? You know people even  adopt kids and i think love them also!

"Love" can mean many different things given the context. The love for an adopted child is obviously different to that for a blood child, but both sorts are describes as "love".

[thaibeachlovers]

7 hours ago, 473geo said:

There are people who don't enjoy the roller coaster?

Essential part of the fun of life ????

 

I absolutely didn't enjoy the low parts of the ride, but I'm not a masochist.

[BangkokReady]

10 hours ago, Tanomazu said:

We should always remember that primates are naturally promiscuous and that love is an artificial construct, as is pair bonding, which was invented by males who were defeated in male on male competition.

How did they "invent" the physiological reaction that comes with pair bonding?  Releases of endorphins, imprinting and literal phycological attachment, etc?  Did they force the human body to change?