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Posted

Living with a girl you're not married to, but you have two children (boy is 18 and the girl is 16), and she's dating a Thai man. She constantly demands money, and when she doesn't get it, she constantly threatens you with knives or threatens to call the police . The kids are keeping you in that house, but the situation is unsustainable: so what would you do? Leave or put up with everything for the kids?

Posted
8 minutes ago, Fabio1980 said:

Living with a girl you're not married to, but you have two children (boy is 18 and the girl is 16), and she's dating a Thai man. She constantly demands money, and when she doesn't get it, she constantly threatens you with knives or threatens to call the police . The kids are keeping you in that house, but the situation is unsustainable: so what would you do? Leave or put up with everything for the kids?

Who is the father?

  • Thumbs Down 1
Posted

There is a  wonderful word, NO. Learn to use it. In the meantime, find a new place to live. 

1 hour ago, CharlieH said:

The kids are not "kids" at that age, get out and let them decide where they want to be.

You are entitled to a life too.

 

 

In Thailand, the age of majority is 20, or upon marriage. The parent or guardian  has the right to control the   minor until age 20 or marriage, so if she wants to punish this guy by taking it out on the kids, she can.

The man must either apply  for guardianship or help emancipate the minors so that they can choose to live with him.

He would be best served by seeking legal counsel.

Posted

The children probably have a smartphone already and their ID cards. If not get that sorted first.

 

The children are old enough to have their own bank accounts, so get them sorted with that too.

 

Start transferring a monthly allowance to them and show them how it works.

 

Then leave, but keep in touch with the kids.

Posted
2 hours ago, NanLaew said:

Start transferring a monthly allowance to them and show them how it works.

Do it already every month plus pay for schools, insurance, etc.

They have smartphones, iPad and ID. They also have my surname.

Posted
7 hours ago, Fabio1980 said:

Living with a girl you're not married to, but you have two children (boy is 18 and the girl is 16), and she's dating a Thai man. She constantly demands money, and when she doesn't get it, she constantly threatens you with knives or threatens to call the police . The kids are keeping you in that house, but the situation is unsustainable: so what would you do? Leave or put up with everything for the kids?

Totally get how hard this is, especially when kids are involved—it’s never just a simple decision to leave. But no matter your age, you still deserve peace, stability, and a life that feels like your own. Even if you’re staying in the same house for now, carving out space—mentally, emotionally, and physically—is crucial. Stick to the routines and habits that make you feel grounded. Meditation, mindfulness, even the smallest daily practices that center you—they matter more than ever now.

 

Don’t beat yourself up for how things turned out. It’s easy to get stuck in the “how did I end up here” loop, but what matters is where you go from here. Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation—it means making room to shift, even a little, toward something better.

 

These situations can eat away at your mental and physical health if you stay stuck in survival mode too long.

You’re not alone. And this isn’t just happening to you—it’s happening for you, even if the reason isn’t clear yet. Hang in there, and be kind to yourself through all of it.

Posted
7 hours ago, blaze master said:

 

This x 10. 

 

She even has a bf. Good grief. Every minute you spend with this  bitch you miss out for your own life. 

 

Go be happy.

Sometimes it can actually be a relief—when their focus is elsewhere, it gives you space to breathe, focus on yourself, and make the most of your time with your kids.

Posted
7 hours ago, Fabio1980 said:

Living with a girl you're not married to... and she's dating a Thai man

 

You what now?

 

You're living with a girl who's dating a Thai man?

 

What???

Posted
6 hours ago, save the frogs said:

why would you tolerate her having a thai bf?

 

get out and pay support for the children.

 

 

Emotionally, it’s not easy to leave when you have kids—you stay because of them. And in a way, the Thai boyfriend brings some relief, since the spotlight shifts off you. That space can let you focus on your own life and actually enjoy the time you have with your children.

Posted
7 hours ago, Fabio1980 said:

Living with a girl you're not married to, but you have two children (boy is 18 and the girl is 16), and she's dating a Thai man. She constantly demands money, and when she doesn't get it, she constantly threatens you with knives or threatens to call the police . The kids are keeping you in that house, but the situation is unsustainable: so what would you do? Leave or put up with everything for the kids?

Take your pants and run

Posted

You have slowly allowed her to become the alpha and relegated yourself to the position of her bitch.

 

I have a friend here in Chiang Rai just the same. Scared <deleted>less of his wife, it’s complete nonsense and self inflicted.

 

Assume your role in life as master of the house and do it PDQ.

  • Haha 2
Posted
2 hours ago, Fabio1980 said:

Do it already every month plus pay for schools, insurance, etc.

They have smartphones, iPad and ID. They also have my surname.

 

Then you know what to do, and there's no need to hang around in such a toxic 'relationship'.

Posted

The last thing in the world I would do is tolerate that nonsense. I would definitely get a divorce, offer some support to the children, and do everything in my power to withdraw support from her, and rain down misery upon her. You would even have the option of maintaining full custody of the children after she's out of the picture, as the Thai courts typically rule in favor of the bread winner. 

 

Has it occurred to you that you've taken on the role of a martyr for the sake of the children? 

Posted
11 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I got the idea this is another Bob Smith account, and all the silly stories are just made up.

Just do a search for the OPs other daft threads.

 

Could be.

The story doesn't make much sense to me. 

Keep up the good work. AN should put you on the payroll as a sleuth. 

 

  • Like 1
Posted
19 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I got the idea this is another Bob Smith account, and all the silly stories are just made up.

Just do a search for the OPs other daft threads.

 

 

 

I think you're right, has to be a comedy thread, who in their right mind would live with a girl that has a Thai bf?

Posted
1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

I got the idea this is another Bob Smith account, and all the silly stories are just made up.

Just do a search for the OPs other daft threads.

 

 

He's learnt not to sign off with regards >insert latest name<, but he just can't hide his writing style 

Posted
3 hours ago, JBChiangRai said:

You have slowly allowed her to become the alpha and relegated yourself to the position of her bitch.

 

I have a friend here in Chiang Rai just the same. Scared <deleted>less of his wife, it’s complete nonsense and self inflicted.

 

Assume your role in life as master of the house and do it PDQ.

Except it is her house and her kids. Pull the chute and leave.

Posted
16 hours ago, falangUK said:

Totally get how hard this is, especially when kids are involved—it’s never just a simple decision to leave. But no matter your age, you still deserve peace, stability, and a life that feels like your own. Even if you’re staying in the same house for now, carving out space—mentally, emotionally, and physically—is crucial. Stick to the routines and habits that make you feel grounded. Meditation, mindfulness, even the smallest daily practices that center you—they matter more than ever now.

 

Don’t beat yourself up for how things turned out. It’s easy to get stuck in the “how did I end up here” loop, but what matters is where you go from here. Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation—it means making room to shift, even a little, toward something better.

 

These situations can eat away at your mental and physical health if you stay stuck in survival mode too long.

You’re not alone. And this isn’t just happening to you—it’s happening for you, even if the reason isn’t clear yet. Hang in there, and be kind to yourself through all of it.

I leave the house at 6 am even if I start work at 9 am. Spend the time at any coffee I find on the way to work. Finish work at 7 pm, I rarely back home so early and wait until 9/10 pm having dinner.

Posted
15 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

You what now?

 

You're living with a girl who's dating a Thai man?

 

What???

 

15 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I got the idea this is another Bob Smith account, and all the silly stories are just made up.

Just do a search for the OPs other daft threads.

 

 

So you think all my stories are just fake?

Posted
15 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I got the idea this is another Bob Smith account, and all the silly stories are just made up.

Just do a search for the OPs other daft threads.

 

 

So you think all my stories are fake, right?

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