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What was the outcome when your daughter found out your TGF was younger than her?


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Posted (edited)

I have seen more than 2 or 3 western women get insulted when a farang man has a wife more than 15 years his junior. When you reside in Thailand over a period of time you see that the May -December marriages are not unusual, but unfortunately in many cases the cultural of age difference is not transferrable westward. 

Some men display a cocky demeanor sporting a younger wife as a trophy and this is no doubt a turn-off to the folks back home. 

Many in the west do not stop and think that if a man in his 60s or late 50s retires in Thailand, finding a woman 15 to 20 years younger is desirable. As one ages in the west finding a suitable partner is difficult for those who are not wealthy. You can move to Thailand, live comfortably on a limited income and find a good partner. I have seen many older western men happy with a Thai wife over age 35 but very few with wives between 20 and 28. 

 

Also, if your family lives in the west and you tell them you have a younger wife and post a picture, that may spark a negative reaction. I think it might be different if your children actually meet the younger spouse.

One thing I have learned from my students who have a foreign parent is that the young Thai/western children who are born from Dad's second or third marriage in Thailand are often ignored by the older western children from the previous marriage when they meet.

Edited by jingjai9
Posted

Mine was surprised but quickly dropped the subject. I don't know what happened when/if she told her mother

Posted (edited)
3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If I'd had to wait for a woman to find me physically attractive I'd still be a virgin at 67.

Come on on not as simple as that hells bells and poetry only last around 3 months then you find out whether it will last.

 

Edited by Kwasaki
Posted (edited)
11 minutes ago, kennypowers said:

I would imagine it would come as a real shock to any kid to find out their father was the stereotypical creepy guy with a young Asian GF who is only with him because he can provide financial security. It's embarrassing .

 

Young women do not find old men attractive. Your kids know this, so when they see this dynamic playing out it's hard to get used to the idea that your dad is with someone because of convenience; that is: she gets money/her kids/family taken care of, and he gets to slobber over a young woman's body every night (or day). It isn't pleasant to realize that that's who your father is. It's shallow, and hard to come to terms with. 

 

Up until that point, your kid(s) probably had this idea that, considering the values their dad taught them growing up, he would date/marry someone he could relate to, someone who grew up in the same era and likes the same music, art, hobbies. Someone on a similar intellectual level when it comes to politics, philosophy, etc. 

 

It would also be hard for your children to relate to that woman, to know she is only really there for the handouts, that she doesn't really love your father or find him remotely attractive. Moreover, she couldn't care less for his intelligence and life achievements. Try looking at it from the perspective of your children, rather than your selfish "f*** everyone" point of view. 

 

It's all well and god saying, "They have to lump it. It's my life, etc". But if one has children, one should always consider how one's actions make them feel and how they impact the father-child relationship. My relationship with my kids will always come before any woman. What my kids think of me matters. No matter what age I am, I am their role model. 

 

Said perfectly. This thread is an embarrassment and it only reveals who on this forum were the guys that struck out hard in life.

Edited by HandsomeTallFarang
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Posted
3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If I'd had to wait for a woman to find me physically attractive I'd still be a virgin at 67.

I mean you could probably find someone to at least tolerate your presence + can connect through similar tastes and hobbies. Not paying for long-long-long-long time holiday GF. 

 

 

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Posted
11 minutes ago, kennypowers said:

I would imagine it would come as a real shock to any kid to find out their father was the stereotypical creepy guy with a young Asian GF who is only with him because he can provide financial security. It's embarrassing .

 

Young women do not find old men attractive. Your kids know this, so when they see this dynamic playing out it's hard to get used to the idea that your dad is with someone because of convenience; that is: she gets money/her kids/family taken care of, and he gets to slobber over a young woman's body every night (or day). It isn't pleasant to realize that that's who your father is. It's shallow, and hard to come to terms with. 

 

Up until that point, your kid(s) probably had this idea that, considering the values their dad taught them growing up, he would date/marry someone he could relate to, someone who grew up in the same era and likes the same music, art, hobbies. Someone on a similar intellectual level when it comes to politics, philosophy, etc. 

 

It would also be hard for your children to relate to that woman, to know she is only really there for the handouts, that she doesn't really love your father or find him remotely attractive. Moreover, she couldn't care less for his intelligence and life achievements. Try looking at it from the perspective of your children, rather than your selfish "f*** everyone" point of view. 

 

It's all well and god saying, "They have to lump it. It's my life, etc". But if one has children, one should always consider how one's actions make them feel and how they impact the father-child relationship. My relationship with my kids will always come before any woman. What my kids think of me matters. No matter what age I am, I am their role model. 

 

So sad.

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Posted
4 minutes ago, HandsomeTallFarang said:

Said perfectly. This thread is an embarrassment and it only reveals who on this forum were the guys that struck out hard in life.

Yet here you are all embarrassed and whatnot...

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Posted
8 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

More to the point, how many farangs with very much younger wives, girlfriends would give them up because someone else didn't approve?

Personally, I'd tell them if they didn't like it to bog off.

I worried about that dreaded day when it first came up !

They are similar in age ! My wife went straight off for a hug and the biggest admiring smile !

My American kids reciprocated!

What a relief !

My wife loves my kids and my kids are happy for me . 
My son said Ric, she treats you like a King.

Cant ask for a better situation!
 

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Posted

Don't know.  My TGF (now my wife) is only 8 years younger than me, and the oldest of the four wives I've had.

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Posted
5 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

Why?

Because, as far as I know, pedophilia is still a crime.  But for under-age boy lovers?  Feel free to come on out. 
Let's see who you are.  Oh, and those who prey on under-age girls too.   People who sexually prey on the under-aged should be thrown in a hole for the rest of their lives.  They are obscene dangers to society. 

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Posted
33 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

I must be very boring.  No girlfriend, just a wife who's 30 years younger than me and an 8-year-old child.

Are you happy that's what counts. ????

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Posted
1 hour ago, kennypowers said:

 

It's all well and god saying, "They have to lump it. It's my life, etc". But if one has children, one should always consider how one's actions make them feel and how they impact the father-child relationship. My relationship with my kids will always come before any woman. What my kids think of me matters. No matter what age I am, I am their role model. 

 

Well written!

Posted
12 hours ago, Nemises said:

If she accepted it and your relationship with your daughter didn’t suffer, then good for you!
However, interested in hearing from those whose daughter’s did not approve. 
Still not talking with the daughter?

What about her children (the grandkids)? Miss not knowing them?

Did other family members take the side of your daughter?


 

 

 

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

I find the thought of having sex with a 60+ year old woman 'kinda creepy'.

you're right they are kinda creepy but they get there

Posted
1 hour ago, spidermike007 said:

Some guys like me, simply prefer younger women. Not kids, but women who are 15, 20 or 25 years younger than us. For a dozen very valid reasons. I could break them down, but why bother? The PC crew will jump on this and say it is not right. You should not be able to have this kind of life, without jumping over ridiculous hurdles! Means nothing to me. I do not do PC. Why be with a woman our age, if we do not need to? Nothing wrong with it, if it works for you. But It is virtually impossible for a 60 year old man in the US, to hook up with a 36 year old woman, unless she is very fat or very ugly, or he is a centi millionaire, or is famous. Period. It just does not happen in this day and age.

 

Here it is possible. Granted he will likely get with a woman of lesser means, who needs a guy who can provide some financial stability. So what? Who cares? Most women want financial stability anywhere in the world, whether they admit it or not. The difference is here the women are more honest about their financial needs and desires. I know a lot of men who have engaged in relationships with lovely, kind, supportive, humorous, and sexy women here, who are no longer lonely.

 

We have very good lives here. Fulfilling lives. Lives we could never dream of having back in the US, Oz, NZ, UK, Canada, or most of Europe. 

well written.

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Posted
10 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

Another where personal men's lives and situations can be so different.

What was the outcome family and friends love my wife and are please that I am happy.

 

Briefly I took my future wife for a 6 month holiday the first length of stay given to her at the time to UK to meet the family and my 2 youngest who lived with me 10 and 16yr old.

 

My eldest son is same age as my wife. 

My eldest daughter is 2years younger.

My middle son 12 years younger.

 

When my wife was able to get the 2 year uk visa it was a great help with my to youngest while I was planning my retirement.

 

She met my previous 3 wives except one, met all my friends and when we returned to Thailand together and me retiring here, family mostly and friends have come to Thailand on holidays to see us every year except covid time.

 

 

Wow, what was your job to pay for all of that? ????

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Posted
27 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

I think it's also the fact that men are so brow-beaten and shamed in most Western cultures.

 

Ask anyone why they have a problem with a large age-gap relationship and they generally can't specify any particular reason.  They just say "it's disgusting", or they pretend that if the guy is considerably older than the girl then the relationship must be exploiting her.  Really, they simply don't like it.

 

It basically comes down to the fact that they have been conditioned not to like it, to expect a man to do as he is told, and that the correct response is to shame and shun until the man does as is expected.

It is weird. 75yo with 28yo. 

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