Getting Divorced

[James2494]

I looking for recommendations for a lawyer to give me advice on the situation that I find myself in. I came to the UK, my home, last summer and a week after I arrived my wife of 11 years contacted me to announce that she wanted a divorce. No gave no real reason and rejected any reconciliation. She seems to be expecting me to do the divorce and I said that I wouldn't do it. Since then she has not communicated with me at all and doesn't respond to any messages or letters that I send to her to find out what her intentions are.

She seemed to want her "freedom" but has done nothing in seven months to get her freedom. Is that kind of behaviour normal. wanting a divorce but expecting the husband to do it all, especially now I am located in the UK.

[flyingtlger]

 

I think there's more to the story here. Where in Thailand before going back to the UK? How long were you gone? Maybe she found something you didn't want her to see? Maybe her friends told her Thailand is an adult Funland?  Maybe she cheated on you and decided she wants the other person?  

From my experience, once a woman makes up her mind to leave you, 99% of the time, it will be very hard to change her mind.

You need to find a good divorce lawyer to protect yourself.

[Georgealbert]

There is plenty of advice online about divorce, an example below.

 

For a simple uncontested divorce you both go to the Amphur and sign the documents, etc for a couple hundred baht.

 

Contested Divorce is a divorce by Court Judgment, and will cost money, where one party files a lawsuit in court and presenting reasons for the divorce under the grounds listed in Section 1516 Thai Civil Code.

 

From your post seems she could soon use this “ One spouse has deserted the other for more than one year; the latter may enter a claim for divorce”

 

Save yourself the problem and any stress, just get an uncontested divorce if you ever visit Thailand again, or let her file to a court. There is obviously.no future in the marriage as you have chosen to live in the UK and you both don’t communicate. You also describe the UK as your home, so wonder how much of that 11 years married, was together as a couple, so maybe best to move on.

 

https://www.juslaws.com/civil-litigation/family-disputes?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=th-divorce&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIocvcrI3jhAMVD6VmAh36TAAXEAAYASAAEgIOYPD_BwE

[James2494]

"There is obviously.no future in the marriage as you have chosen to live in the UK and you both don’t communicate. You also describe the UK as your home, so wonder how much of that 11 years married, was together as a couple, so maybe best to move on. "

I don't understand your response, yes I have a home in the UK. My son lives in it. Am I not allowed to visit my son from time to time? Am I not allowed to keep a home in the UK just because I marry a Thai? What do you mean "we both don't communicate". I communicate with her. She doesn't respond.

"For a simple uncontested divorce you both go to the Amphur and sign the documents, etc for a couple hundred baht. " If it is that simple why doesn't she do it or suggest it? "or let her file to a court." but she has no interest it seems in doing that.

"as you have chosen to live in the UK" I didn't choose to live in the UK. I didn't have much choice as to where to live after she said she wanted a divorce and I was not welcome to return to her. Are you suggesting that I force entry into the matrimonial home?

[James2494]

51 minutes ago, flyingtlger said:

You need to find a good divorce lawyer to protect yourself.

I thought that was I said "I looking for recommendations for a lawyer to give me advice on the situation that I find myself in."

"I think there's more to the story here." Yes there is always more to a story but then I don't know what it is but how is that is relevant to wanting a recommendation for a lawyer.

 

[Skipalongcassidy]

Is this writing style what they teach in the UK... all the proper English teachers must have been on strike.

[thaibeachlovers]

10 minutes ago, James2494 said:

"For a simple uncontested divorce you both go to the Amphur and sign the documents, etc for a couple hundred baht. " If it is that simple why doesn't she do it or suggest it? "or let her file to a court." but she has no interest it seems in doing that.

You both have to be present at amphur and it cost about 20 baht when I did it.

 

To go to family court costs a lot of money and lawyers. Amphur requires no lawyers as long as both prepared to agree on any division of property. Children would complicate things.

 

You can do nothing, but if on a pension it may affect how much you get.

After a couple of years she can go to court and get a divorce based on abandonment.

 

You should do everything you can to avoid using a lawyer.

[save the frogs]

2 hours ago, James2494 said:

No gave no real reason and rejected any reconciliation.

yeah but the fact that you were completely unaware that she was dissatisfied is a problem.

or maybe it was an affair or sth. but usually there are signs of dissatisfaction 

 

[James2494]

1 hour ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

Is this writing style what they teach in the UK... all the proper English teachers must have been on strike.

?????

 

[James2494]

From the link

Uncontested divorce. To pursue this route, the involved parties must draft a written Divorce Agreement articulating their mutual decision to divorce.

 

That requires both parties to agree and communicate.

[Skipalongcassidy]

22 minutes ago, James2494 said:

From the link

Uncontested divorce. To pursue this route, the involved parties must draft a written Divorce Agreement articulating their mutual decision to divorce.

 

That requires both parties to agree and communicate.

It requires both parties to agree... draw it up and have her sign it... unfortunately for you she does not have to talk to you in order to do that

[James2494]

6 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

It requires both parties to agree... draw it up and have her sign it... unfortunately for you she does not have to talk to you in order to do that

Surely the bit about getting her to sign it requires communication?

[Upnotover]

12 minutes ago, James2494 said:

Surely the bit about getting her to sign it requires communication?

 

But it seems she can if she wants/needs to....

3 hours ago, James2494 said:

my wife of 11 years contacted me to announce that she wanted a divorce

 

[Skipalongcassidy]

6 minutes ago, James2494 said:

Surely the bit about getting her to sign it requires communication?

Yes... but nothing requires it to be direct conversation from her to you... she can simply put out her hand and have the amphur hand her the document to sign... she simply has to be present at the amphur to do that... she can even request that she be allowed a separate room or area if she really does not want any contact with you at all... sorry... just move on... you seem to think that communication only comes in one form... it comes in many.

[Georgealbert]

2 hours ago, James2494 said:

From the link

Uncontested divorce. To pursue this route, the involved parties must draft a written Divorce Agreement articulating their mutual decision to divorce.

 

That requires both parties to agree and communicate.

Sorry but yes, that is why it is called an uncontested divorce.

 

What do you want a lawyer for? 
 

1. Court divorce? or
2. To try to make her have you back?

3. Is there property involved?

4. Are there assists to split up?

5. Is this about your pride, as she has rejected you?

 

Your messages are not clear of what you want to achieve or where you want to live in the future and what outcomes are wanted.

 

Unless you communicate with her, it will not get sorted and probably cost you more. 

[James2494]

On 3/8/2024 at 2:17 AM, Georgealbert said:

Sorry but yes, that is why it is called an uncontested divorce.

 

What do you want a lawyer for? 
 

1. Court divorce? or
2. To try to make her have you back?

3. Is there property involved?

4. Are there assists to split up?

5. Is this about your pride, as she has rejected you?

 

Your messages are not clear of what you want to achieve or where you want to live in the future and what outcomes are wanted.

 

Unless you communicate with her, it will not get sorted and probably cost you more. 

It is her that is not communicating not me. I say again how do I do an uncontested divorce if she wont communicate?

[James2494]

On 3/8/2024 at 12:47 AM, Skipalongcassidy said:

Yes... but nothing requires it to be direct conversation from her to you... she can simply put out her hand and have the amphur hand her the document to sign... she simply has to be present at the amphur to do that... she can even request that she be allowed a separate room or area if she really does not want any contact with you at all... sorry... just move on... you seem to think that communication only comes in one form... it comes in many.

And all my possessions in the house. I just write them off also? I thought I was entitled to the division of marital assets?

[Lucky Bones]

Sounds suss. If the wife had to "contact" him something was awry.

Next bogus story please.🙃🙃

 

[Skipalongcassidy]

Just now, James2494 said:

And all my possessions in the house. I just write them off also? I thought I was entitled to the division of marital assets?

That should be outlined in the divorce document... specifically listing what is yours to keep... so if she doesn't agree then an uncontested divorce goes out the window and now becomes a contested divorce with the lawyers and judges and all the trappings... she still is not required to talk to you. 

[James2494]

Why is this suss? "If the wife had to "contact" him something was awry." What does that have to do with a recommendation for a lawyer?

[James2494]

4 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

That should be outlined in the divorce document... specifically listing what is yours to keep... so if she doesn't agree then an uncontested divorce goes out the window and now becomes a contested divorce with the lawyers and judges and all the trappings... she still is not required to talk to you. 

And of course all of this is done in English I take it.

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, James2494 said:

Why is this suss? "If the wife had to "contact" him something was awry." What does that have to do with a recommendation for a lawyer?

Forget lawyers, just do nothing.

I can never understand a mans urge to co-operate, remaining married costs YOU nothing.

[Skipalongcassidy]

6 minutes ago, James2494 said:

And of course all of this is done in English I take it.

Can be depending on Amphur level of English proficiency... but this is Thailand and there is no directive that English be spoken... they don't come to your country and demand that Thai be spoken.  Hire a translator.

[Lacessit]

Under Thai law, assets acquired after the marriage are divided equally between the two parties. Assets acquired before marriage stay with whoever brought them in.

 

Unless the OP is planning on marrying again, do nothing. Let her be the one to go through the process.

 

Every time the OP attempts to communicate with her, it validates her behavior.

[EVENKEEL]

8 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Forget lawyers, just do nothing.

I can never understand a mans urge to co-operate, remaining married costs YOU nothing.

I agree 100%. Life is too short.

[fredwiggy]

On 3/8/2024 at 4:17 AM, James2494 said:

I looking for recommendations for a lawyer to give me advice on the situation that I find myself in. I came to the UK, my home, last summer and a week after I arrived my wife of 11 years contacted me to announce that she wanted a divorce. No gave no real reason and rejected any reconciliation. She seems to be expecting me to do the divorce and I said that I wouldn't do it. Since then she has not communicated with me at all and doesn't respond to any messages or letters that I send to her to find out what her intentions are.

She seemed to want her "freedom" but has done nothing in seven months to get her freedom. Is that kind of behaviour normal. wanting a divorce but expecting the husband to do it all, especially now I am located in the UK.

Isaan lawyers have an English speaking attorney, along with translators. Based out of Korat but will travel, extra costs of course. There are many lawyers around. Siam is another. You and her will need to go to the amphur to sign. I'm thinking there are process servers here. If she doesn't agree on split 50/50 of marital assets, you'll need to see a judge, and having a lawyer helps. The house will go to her unless you fight for it and want to live in it  meaning if you paid 100%, otherwise you could sell and split the profit. No kids no problem. I'm guessing your son is from a previous and since he lives alone that doesn't matter anyway. If you divorce and want to stay in Thailand, you'll need a retirement visa or work visa. Do you have any of her family that could give her your thoughts?

[JensenZ]

On 3/8/2024 at 5:06 AM, Georgealbert said:

There is plenty of advice online about divorce, an example below.

 

For a simple uncontested divorce you both go to the Amphur and sign the documents, etc for a couple hundred baht.

 

Contested Divorce is a divorce by Court Judgment, and will cost money, where one party files a lawsuit in court and presenting reasons for the divorce under the grounds listed in Section 1516 Thai Civil Code.

 

From your post seems she could soon use this “ One spouse has deserted the other for more than one year; the latter may enter a claim for divorce”

 

Save yourself the problem and any stress, just get an uncontested divorce if you ever visit Thailand again, or let her file to a court. There is obviously.no future in the marriage as you have chosen to live in the UK and you both don’t communicate. You also describe the UK as your home, so wonder how much of that 11 years married, was together as a couple, so maybe best to move on.

 

https://www.juslaws.com/civil-litigation/family-disputes?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=th-divorce&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIocvcrI3jhAMVD6VmAh36TAAXEAAYASAAEgIOYPD_BwE

I know a bit about uncontested divorce at the Amphur office, in Laksi, Bangkok as I did one last year, but this is useless advice for the OP as he needs to protect his property and rights and they have children.

 

The OP needs to get a good lawyer in Thailand and obtain a judicial divorce. He also needs to be sure that the divorce is legal under UK Divorce laws. 

 

To the OP, if you're going to be in Pattaya I can recommend a good family lawyer.

 

 

[JensenZ]

16 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

Can be depending on Amphur level of English proficiency... but this is Thailand and there is no directive that English be spoken... they don't come to your country and demand that Thai be spoken.  Hire a translator.

Some Amphur offices are very uncooperative when foreigners are involved. Due to this problem, I skipped the Banglamung Amphur Office and did mine in Laksi, Bangkok, with the help of an agent. One hour - all done.

[Skipalongcassidy]

4 minutes ago, JensenZ said:

Some Amphur offices are very uncooperative when foreigners are involved. Due to this problem, I skipped the Banglamung Amphur Office and did mine in Laksi, Bangkok, with the help of an agent. One hour - all done.

Never said it would be easy or cheap... 

[JensenZ]

4 minutes ago, Skipalongcassidy said:

Never said it would be easy or cheap... 

It was easy at the Laksi District Office, but the agent made it easy. That included all the paperwork being translated into English, and legalized by the MFA.