Betrayal by a Self-Serving woman: When a woman prioritizes money over genuine connection, it can be particularly hurtful. The love and intimacy we seek in a relationship often hinge on trust and mutual respect, making it painful when those values are overshadowed by her materialistic motives.

 

How about you?  When did you realize that you are an ATM and nothing but a utility?  Did you enter into a relationship knowing this or did it take you by surprise?

 

For me it took me by surprise.  The girlfriend wore the mask for 2 to 3 years before it started to slip down.

 

I knew a guy at work who said "as soon as she starts to message you and checkinh where you are who you're with, cut her out of your life".  Wise words.

 

 

 

I would have said if she starts to feel the need to check up on him....she should leave.

8 minutes ago, Chris Daley said:

When did you realize that you are an ATM and nothing but a utility?

Never.

9 minutes ago, Chris Daley said:

Betrayal by a Self-Serving woman: When a woman prioritizes money over genuine connection, it can be particularly hurtful. The love and intimacy we seek in a relationship often hinge on trust and mutual respect, making it painful when those values are overshadowed by her materialistic motives.

 

How about you?  When did you realize that you are an ATM and nothing but a utility?  Did you enter into a relationship knowing this or did it take you by surprise?

 

For me it took me by surprise.  The girlfriend wore the mask for 2 to 3 years before it started to slip down.

 

I knew a guy at work who said "as soon as she starts to message you and checkinh where you are who you're with, cut her out of your life".  Wise words.

 

Sadly, there are women like this. I had an experience with a Filipina where for 6 years she was constantly asking for "allowance" every month. As you rightly say, trust and respect are the most important pillars of a relationship and both were impossible with her in the end. It started about 5 months in, with her insinuating her family store was not doing well. Then at the end of the first visit she'd let slip how her sister may not be able to finish school because of a lack of money.

 

They dont' ask outright if they're smart, but see how you react to expressions of indirect need.  All the while they of course talk beautiful words of love, which you must see through, as a woman is enveloping you like a snake, with words of love, and those words enable her to eat you alive if they cast the magic spell and ignite the fantasy of the soul known as love.

 

Man's heart has to be hard.

Chris;s bleak, brutally honest reflections are gold to me. What will you do differently?

Never invest more than you can walk away from. So just work out what money you can give at most and draw the line there.

Oh sure, they can fake it for many years.

I know someone who was with a lady for 10 years.  He trusted the relationship finally bought a 5 million baht house in her name.  Then, it all went to hell.  Many stories like this most women have an agenda. That applies all over the world.

Know what they all are, pay for their time.

Trust No One!

3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Know what they all are, pay for their time.

Trust No One!

That sounds a bit depressive and wrong to boot. One has to be careful, but never to trust seems like a sad situation. I am still 100% good after 20 years, and so are many others. But if one insist on picking up a life partner in a bar, then buyer beware.

Why do people assume that just because they feel let down in a relationship,  everyone else is doomed to the same experience sooner or later ?

 

It seems that those having no problems are unheard from but the squeaky wheels .....make the noise.

27 minutes ago, MeaMaximaCulpa said:

I am still 100% good after 20 years, and so are many others.

 

Yer 26 years for me---I some times get depressed just reading some of the postings on here  I got really burnt in Oz,

lost a lot, & that left me a little bitter for a while--but its not the state of mind,  I would want to live in permanently..............................

3 hours ago, Chris Daley said:

Betrayal by a Self-Serving woman: When a woman prioritizes money over genuine connection, it can be particularly hurtful. The love and intimacy we seek in a relationship often hinge on trust and mutual respect, making it painful when those values are overshadowed by her materialistic motives.

 

How about you?  When did you realize that you are an ATM and nothing but a utility?  Did you enter into a relationship knowing this or did it take you by surprise?

 

For me it took me by surprise.  The girlfriend wore the mask for 2 to 3 years before it started to slip down.

 

I knew a guy at work who said "as soon as she starts to message you and checkinh where you are who you're with, cut her out of your life".  Wise words.

If you weren't of similar age and attractiveness then perhaps she "loved you" in the same way people say they love their job. 

I said and ment it, " I loved teaching at "my" university" but I wouldn't of done it for free and I always had an eye on retirement.

10 minutes ago, sidjameson said:

If you weren't of similar age and attractiveness then perhaps she "loved you" in the same way people say they love their job. 

I said and ment it, " I loved teaching at "my" university" but I wouldn't of done it for free and I always had an eye on retirement.

Hope you weren't teaching English, dude! Sorry, couldn't help it. 😛

 

Where did you find her, op? Not a given a bar girl will be a bad 'un, but they're usually there for financial gain. Having said that, a genuine 'good girl' can be a bad 'un. One has to vet them first and try not to be blinded by love, eh wot wot! 🙂

Don't be too hard on the relationship. Maybe it became like that at the three year mark when it had run it's course after 3 good years. Not sure how her checking up on you all the time is consistent with her not caring and simply wanting dollars. 

3 hours ago, Chris Daley said:

Betrayal by a Self-Serving woman: When a woman prioritizes money over genuine connection, it can be particularly hurtful. The love and intimacy we seek in a relationship often hinge on trust and mutual respect, making it painful when those values are overshadowed by her materialistic motives.

 

How about you?  When did you realize that you are an ATM and nothing but a utility?  Did you enter into a relationship knowing this or did it take you by surprise?

 

For me it took me by surprise.  The girlfriend wore the mask for 2 to 3 years before it started to slip down.

 

I knew a guy at work who said "as soon as she starts to message you and checkinh where you are who you're with, cut her out of your life".  Wise words.

Just another BS story from a foreigner in Thailand who can not find a way to blame himself. Seems like you have good people you know too, as they leave if a girlfriend or wife call and check where they are. But that is the minds of Big men, that put themselves on the top over females as they are soo scared to lose control.

 

Hopefully Chris, you have never been unfaithful, or do you see that as your right as a man? After that, you have never argued with her or come home late drunk as hell. But all that is your right as a man in your world, right?

The reality is that it cuts both ways. Most likely, she got tired of you and then you chose to blame her for prioritizing money, instead of accepting that you are the one who have given it away. But that was when all was good, right? Now, when you not feel so happy, you must find way to take the guilt away from your person.

 

Just man up, and stop being a cry baby!

My silicone sex doll has never asked me for a single Baht. I guess I just got lucky.

Betrayal at work is expected.  With family it happens.  With friends it is a shock.  But in a long term relationship it can never happen.  It reduces the woman to a sex worker.  Time for money.

I have been married to a Thai for 21 years I have never been an ATM being much older than she is she is my ATM now.

6 minutes ago, still kicking said:

I have been married to a Thai for 21 years I have never been an ATM being much older than she is she is my ATM now.

 

That's kind of sad. Somehow feel sorry for you. 😦

1 minute ago, Jeff Reinstad said:

 

That's kind of sad. Somehow feel sorry for you. 😦

I guess you are sad because you are jealous. 

2 minutes ago, Jeff Reinstad said:

 

That's kind of sad. Somehow feel sorry for you. 😦

 

you feel sorry for him because a younger woman is paying for his life ? 

2 minutes ago, stoner said:

 

you feel sorry for him because a younger woman is paying for his life ? 

Just to add to that I am a pensioner she is a nurse with good income 

1 minute ago, stoner said:

 

you feel sorry for him because a younger woman is paying for his life ? 

 

I feel sorry for him because as a man he has no freedom. Which I consider number one in my life. I'm very grateful that I've reached a point where I'm independent, able to make my own decisions without relying on anyone. If I wanted to, I could buy a ticket to Tokyo, Moscow, London, Paris or New York right this moment. Land there, purchase a house and live happily ever after.

 

In contrast he seems proud of being dependent on his wife's income, which is the opposite of what I would take pride in.

 

To me as a man real pride comes from being independent. He celebrates sucking on wife's income. Kind of sad from man's point of view.

7 minutes ago, Jeff Reinstad said:

 

I feel sorry for him because as a man he has no freedom. Which I consider number one in my life. I'm very grateful that I've reached a point where I'm independent, able to make my own decisions without relying on anyone. If I wanted to, I could buy a ticket to Tokyo, Moscow, London, Paris or New York right this moment. Land there, purchase a house and live happily ever after.

 

In contrast he seems proud of being dependent on his wife's income, which is the opposite of what I would take pride in.

 

To me as a man real pride comes from being independent. He celebrates sucking on wife's income. Kind of sad from man's point of view.

 

happiness is only real when shared. 

On 9/7/2024 at 11:17 AM, Cameroni said:

 

Sadly, there are women like this. I had an experience with a Filipina where for 6 years she was constantly asking for "allowance" every month. As you rightly say, trust and respect are the most important pillars of a relationship and both were impossible with her in the end. It started about 5 months in, with her insinuating her family store was not doing well. Then at the end of the first visit she'd let slip how her sister may not be able to finish school because of a lack of money.

 

They dont' ask outright if they're smart, but see how you react to expressions of indirect need.  All the while they of course talk beautiful words of love, which you must see through, as a woman is enveloping you like a snake, with words of love, and those words enable her to eat you alive if they cast the magic spell and ignite the fantasy of the soul known as love.

 

Man's heart has to be hard.

So very sorry to hear about this, you, as a  serious contributor in an other ASEAN sub forum.

As I gather, you escaped this "ordeal" financially "intact".  As opposed to thousands of other Farangs that have left their heart and money in Thailand or the Phippines.

The fact, that you are still "financially intact" offers you the opportunity to "open new doors and new avenues" for you. Fortunately.

 

Ive always been an ATM, but I have a fast cut off switch and I only dispense after.

On 9/8/2024 at 3:04 AM, stoner said:

 

you feel sorry for him because a younger woman is paying for his life ? 

After he gave her $ 100,000

On 9/8/2024 at 3:16 AM, Jeff Reinstad said:

 

I feel sorry for him because as a man he has no freedom. Which I consider number one in my life. I'm very grateful that I've reached a point where I'm independent, able to make my own decisions without relying on anyone. If I wanted to, I could buy a ticket to Tokyo, Moscow, London, Paris or New York right this moment. Land there, purchase a house and live happily ever after.

 

In contrast he seems proud of being dependent on his wife's income, which is the opposite of what I would take pride in.

 

To me as a man real pride comes from being independent. He celebrates sucking on wife's income. Kind of sad from man's point of view.

Freedom is great. I've heard this type of story 1000 times. Man moves to Thailand invest money into house/business and woman agrees to support him. 

12 hours ago, swissie said:

So very sorry to hear about this, you, as a  serious contributor in an other ASEAN sub forum.

As I gather, you escaped this "ordeal" financially "intact".  As opposed to thousands of other Farangs that have left their heart and money in Thailand or the Phippines.

The fact, that you are still "financially intact" offers you the opportunity to "open new doors and new avenues" for you. Fortunately.

 

 

Thank you Swissie, I lost about 200,000 USD all in all over 6 years. All because this woman managed to fire up this fantasy of the soul known as love, and you lose most cognitive function when you're in that state. 

 

But yes, I can still function and  was luckier than many other men who in similar situations were completely ruined. Also because of the decency of my ex-wife.

The loss of that magnificent woman and my children weighs far heavier than the 200,000 USD of course. But you live and learn.

Cannot say that I've ever been tempted to give a woman all my money due to being 'in love'/in a relationship. 

Even when in that state, money did not ever enter the equation. Keep a hold of your assets. You are the captain of the ship.