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You know you are in Pattaya when.....

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Having camped out in this sin hole for the part 12+ years I've noticed a trend in folks who hang out here...

1. Pony tails....on the guys....scratch my head on this one...one of the stupidest things going and mostly on guys who have little or no hair to begin with..?

2. No shirts....should be a law against this...no one wants to look a some fat, sweaty slob.

3. White socks on the Yanks and most likely with flip flops

4. Tattoos.....on all parts of the body....and not pretty by a long shot.

5. Captain hats on all the Russians?

6. The old farts walking around with their mouths hanging open

7. Every expat is an expert on everything and anything...

8. Alcohol gives one infinite patience for stupidity...?

9. I'm on my way down and I don't care who I step on....?

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80 year old grandpas just hanging in the gogos, then bragging about bedding 19 year old village girls who they just paid a fortune to.

What about all those ex special forces and ex CIA guys, why do so many end up in Pattaya? rolleyes.gif

jacky 54 you took the words out of my mouth.

Beat me to it, if my phone hadnt rung i would have posted exactly the same.

That was the sixties (Vietnam)

You wont find many US Citizens there now

Only when 'Cobra Gold' is on

Then watch your girlfriends eyes light up- hehe

You know you are in Pattaya when condoms float past you in the sea, and worse!

What about all those bitter, long in the tooth sexpats that think anyone that looks/acts a little different to them are lower class?

You know, the ones that are so miserable with their lot, that they need to belittle others.

When I pay 3 times the price for a beer and have to listen to all those ex special forces in a bar.

Have a nice day.

  • You can't decide what national food to have, because there's too much choice
  • You can't decide which good dentist to choose, because there's too much choice
  • You can't decide which supermarket to go to for your favourite food from back home, because there's too much choice.
  • You can't decide which very nice restaurant to go to, because there's too much choice.

And best of all, you don't have to dodge past foreigners lecturing you on what is and is not the real Thailand.

When you hear the fat ugly, tattooed facial hair guys getting called "hansome man".

When you get arrested for playing bridge?

When you get arrested for playing bridge?

Do the Thai deck of cards really have 120 cards in them? And do they cost 5000 baht down on Soi 9 ?

First time i went there was on a tour of 15 people in 1994. After a brief look round 13 of them went to the travel agents and booked to go somewhere else for the next 10 days. I was one that stayed thinking i's give it a go, I always wished i had gone somewhere else, it was a ghastly hell hole then and still is. I know i'm in Pattaya when i'd rather be anywhere else.

You approach that drop-dead-gorgeous woman on Walking Street...and discover she is packing a pee-shooter...1zgarz5.gif

What about all those ex special forces and ex CIA guys, why do so many end up in Pattaya? rolleyes.gif

yea I noticed that also ... maybe a new hub of of fart liars ?

When you notice the good looking girl you picked up when drunk has a bigger d**k than you !!

OP is not far off the mark, is he?

- Exception: Farangs playing Polo in the afternoon and Bridge after sunset.smile.png

Cheers.

You know you are in Pattaya when.....

A guy you don't know wearing a dress hits you on the head with a high

heel shoe and demands money,,

You say, ouch, i don't have any money,

he gives you a kiss and leaves ?

  • You can't decide what national food to have, because there's too much choice
  • You can't decide which good dentist to choose, because there's too much choice
  • You can't decide which supermarket to go to for your favourite food from back home, because there's too much choice.
  • You can't decide which very nice restaurant to go to, because there's too much choice.

And best of all, you don't have to dodge past foreigners lecturing you on what is and is not the real Thailand.

Too much choice? I find absolutely nothing at all wrong with having a lot of choices. Too much choice, never.

When you have to stop at the ATM to shop & pay for ear muffs......And the muff part hits your forehead......

Which you proudly (sadly) notch as a conquest......

"Good Guys go to Heaven - Bad Guys go to Pattaya" singlets worn by guys that look like they wears suits when they are not on holidays, or have grand kids back home.

Farrrrr out!!!

you see the Welcome To Pattaya sign.

All of the above, which is why l love it so much!

"Good Guys go to Heaven - Bad Guys go to Pattaya" singlets worn by guys that look like they wears suits when they are not on holidays, or have grand kids back home.

Farrrrr out!!!

On the back of these singlets and T-shirts it says 'Push here when leaning over balcony rail'......

I really ponder at guys who live out in the boonies or in the traffic hell of the capital, Pattaya actually has all you may need.

And one can chose not to or do so.

80 year old grandpas just hanging in the gogos, then bragging about bedding 19 year old village girls who they just paid a fortune to.

Another person who knows how everyone else should live so they conform to his ideas. You should have your own police to monitor people as they do in Saudi Arabia. Make sure we toe the line.

I really don't care that you spend your time counting the hairs in your navel. Rock on!

  • Author

Forgot one and was reminded of it early this morning on Pattayaklang.....guys taking a piss on the footpath.....:-(

  • Author

What about all those bitter, long in the tooth sexpats that think anyone that looks/acts a little different to them are lower class?

You know, the ones that are so miserable with their lot, that they need to belittle others.

And why not.....lol...:-)

Ha! When i had the bar,we used to get all the special forces,special op's,SAS,MI5,6.The best one were"if i tell you,i'll have to kill you,and 'i cant tell you,ive signed the official secrets act"these were probably postmen,dustmen,post room guy's,insurance men,you all know the type.But i suppose reinventment is exciting.I just hope that any of these people never had to prove it.

KKD

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