Married Men: Do you enjoy 'a bit on the side?'

[Boomer6969]

Well to be frank, just a little bit. In two mariages with a total duration of 40 years, only twice did I "fall in love" and "consumed" it. But I had probably 500 lunch time "flying <deleted>s, some of which quite gratifying... and still going, without any regrets nor guilt. ????

[Somchai Jackson]

1 hour ago, WineOh said:

What are your thoughts?

Thai wives and girlfriends who are being taken care of financially seen to have a different view about "men's needs."  I'm not talking about the bargirl types that foreigners get in relationships with.  Those gals are competitive and that insecure competitiveness never dies although if she finds you flirting with another women you may die.

Middle and upper class Thai women who are financially secure allow their men to meet "men's needs" which explains the culture of karaoke, curtain hotels, giks, and mia nois.  Also Thai men who work outside of the country or away from their villages or khets.  Their women understand their "men's needs." 
I know, all us guys from the US and farang countries are called Sex-Pats.  We don't make up a fraction of the sex trade and sexual trysts that happen between Thai men who are married and other women.  If you're taking care of your Thai GF or wife or whoever in style then she knows better than to open her mouth about sex on the side that isn't with her.  That's a fast way to find herself poor.  Then suddenly she becomes a mia noi to make ends meet. 

And if you're a foreign guy who doesn't understand this little piece of Thai culture then you are a fool.  More than likely your GF or wife or whoever is taking your money and banging someone else on the side. 

Edited January 23, 2021 by Somchai Jackson

[Antonymous]

24 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

The big question is will she remember that when you do the boys will be boys part and she finds out...

Or for that matter, when you do the boys.

[Peterw42]

I'm not out playing up and dont really intend to, but as others have said, its almost expected of you in Thailand. Thai girls seem to grow up thinking its normal for a guy to play  up, have a mia noi. 

I think the belief that westerners are less likely to be unfaithful is one of the reasons some Thai girls  seek out westerners.

 

I have also seen some mates get caught out having a bit on the side but the odd thing is they dont get in trouble, the wife seeks out the girl they have been seeing, to tear strips off her. 

[Tanoshi]

1 hour ago, WineOh said:

all of them were well educated with good jobs and good social circles. 

That's the only reason their wives permit their indiscretions.

[OneMoreFarang]

I think the problem with many wives is that they don't understand the thinking of their husbands.

 

If a guy is married and he goes out to a bar and spends an hour or two with one of those girls what is really the problem?

As far as I know most guys just want sex. Let's have fun. And maybe a week later lets have fun again with the same girl or maybe with another girl. As soon as the sex gets boring or she starts to tell you her family problems then it's time to say bye bye. Guys often don't remember the name of the girl an hour later. Maybe they forgot it already or they never asked her.

 

But when the wife finds out her first question is likely: What is her name?

The answer is obviously: Who cares, I just f$#$ her. I don't want to marry her.

But it seem that is the difficult part for many women to understand that the guy just wants to have fun. It is something totally different than the relation with the wife or the long term gf. The only problem is: How to explain that to her? And because most guys don't know how they could possibly explain that a little sex on the side doesn't matter they don't even try to explain it. They just do it. And if the wife asks: Me? Sure not, I would never do such things. ???? 

[FritsSikkink]

51 minutes ago, WineOh said:

My wife has no intention of sleeping around.

But she has also hinted to me in the past that she would be OK if I did...

She has never actually come out and said sleep around, but she has said things like 'boys will be boys' and 'men always do anyway' etc.

See how she reacts when you actually do it. Up to you, doesn't mean Up to you.

[Antonymous]

I absolutely never even think about having a bit on the side since I got married. Ridiculous immoral notion.

 

On a related topic. Does your wife read TV and know your avatar? Mine does.

[WineOh]

40 minutes ago, CraigInBangkok said:

if you need to go out for "bits on the side" you obviously married the wrong woman

I strongly disagree with this.

I married my wife for her brain first and foremost.

She is a smart woman.

 

However, walking down the street I am constantly checking other birds out.

all the time.

 

Heterosexual men are hardwire biologically to have sex with as many different women as possible.

It is hardwired into their DNA to promote procreation and ensure the survival of the human race.

 

It is social morals that stop many men from unzipping their shorts. 

[CraigInBangkok]

2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I think the problem with many wives is that they don't understand the thinking of their husbands.

 

If a guy is married and he goes out to a bar and spends an hour or two with one of those girls what is really the problem?

As far as I know most guys just want sex. Let's have fun. And maybe a week later lets have fun again with the same girl or maybe with another girl. As soon as the sex gets boring or she starts to tell you her family problems then it's time to say bye bye. Guys often don't remember the name of the girl an hour later. Maybe they forgot it already or they never asked her.

 

But when the wife finds out her first question is likely: What is her name?

The answer is obviously: Who cares, I just f$#$ her. I don't want to marry her.

But it seem that is the difficult part for many women to understand that the guy just wants to have fun. It is something totally different than the relation with the wife or the long term gf. The only problem is: How to explain that to her? And because most guys don't know how they could possibly explain that a little sex on the side doesn't matter they don't even try to explain it. They just do it. And if the wife asks: Me? Sure not, I would never do such things. ???? 

I see things differently ... I don't see the point of just blowing your load in a faceless hole. I did loads of that when I was younger and its just an empty feeling, as soon as it over just trying to get them out the door. Been with my wife 18 years and for me sex never got boring plus its so much better with an emotional connection. 

[Odysseus123]

1 minute ago, Antonymous said:

On a related topic. Does your wife read TV and know your avatar? Mine does.

Oh my god!

[WineOh]

40 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

MODS, I think you should close this rather pathetic and uninteresting  post. 

The point of this thread is to shed light on the fact that we seem to live in a sexually tolerant country.

The thai wives have no hang ups about their fellas cheating on them every other day...

Why not take a seat at the buffet yourself? 

 

Fill your boots I say ! ???? 

Edited January 23, 2021 by WineOh

[CraigInBangkok]

7 minutes ago, WineOh said:

Heterosexual men are hardwire biologically to have sex with as many different women as possible.

It is hardwired into their DNA to promote procreation and ensure the survival of the human race.

 

It is social morals that stop many men from unzipping their shorts. 

You can tell yourself whatever you like .. its not like that for me. Maybe you didnt get much action when you were a lad and now think you are Benjamin Button.

Anyway, its upto you what you do and you will view it your way and I will view it mine. It takes all sorts after all

Edited January 23, 2021 by CraigInBangkok

[HashBrownHarry]

38 minutes ago, RichardColeman said:

I've been with my current wife nearly 6 years.

I've had so much sex with other women in my head its unreal. 

NO, I have not and would not cheat on my wife.

That said, I've had some good times with schoolgirls and maids in my 6 years to my wife ????

 

My mind, if you need to have sex with another person whilst married - and you're not both swingers - then you married the wrong person. 

School girls......yikes.

[1FinickyOne]

56 minutes ago, Pilotman said:

MODS, I think you should close this rather pathetic and uninteresting  post. 

overstepping here a bit? 

 

Does this upset you? asked Sigmund... 

Edited January 23, 2021 by 1FinickyOne

[eeworldwide]

It's all fun and games until it's not.

 

Why destroy what you've built?

 

Makes no sense.

[1FinickyOne]

21 minutes ago, WineOh said:

Heterosexual men are hardwire biologically

Bill Maher said something like - - women like to go shopping for shoes. Its not that they don't have shoes, they like new shoes... 

 

you can fill in the rest of it

[Peterw42]

32 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I think the problem with many wives is that they don't understand the thinking of their husbands.

 

If a guy is married and he goes out to a bar and spends an hour or two with one of those girls what is really the problem?

As far as I know most guys just want sex. Let's have fun. And maybe a week later lets have fun again with the same girl or maybe with another girl. As soon as the sex gets boring or she starts to tell you her family problems then it's time to say bye bye. Guys often don't remember the name of the girl an hour later. Maybe they forgot it already or they never asked her.

 

But when the wife finds out her first question is likely: What is her name?

The answer is obviously: Who cares, I just f$#$ her. I don't want to marry her.

But it seem that is the difficult part for many women to understand that the guy just wants to have fun. It is something totally different than the relation with the wife or the long term gf. The only problem is: How to explain that to her? And because most guys don't know how they could possibly explain that a little sex on the side doesn't matter they don't even try to explain it. They just do it. And if the wife asks: Me? Sure not, I would never do such things. ???? 

I found a food analogy works well to explain it to wife.

We need to have food or we die, if there is a regular interesting home cooked meal at home we are usually happy.

But sometimes we may get a snack when outside, and think nothing of it.

 

Edited January 23, 2021 by Peterw42

[Kelsall]

Single man: "When you married guys are out fooling around, we single guys come over and <deleted> your wives."

 

Married man:  "Thanks."

[OneMoreFarang]

22 minutes ago, CraigInBangkok said:

I see things differently ... I don't see the point of just blowing your load in a faceless hole. I did loads of that when I was younger and its just an empty feeling, as soon as it over just trying to get them out the door. Been with my wife 18 years and for me sex never got boring plus its so much better with an emotional connection. 

Personally I think it's different.

 

Let's compare it to food. I love the way my gf cooks and I eat it almost everyday.

But I also like the taste of food which was prepared by other chefs. It makes life more exiting to have something different from time to time. And then the food back home still tastes good.

[1FinickyOne]

25 minutes ago, CraigInBangkok said:

I don't see the point of just blowing your load in a faceless hole. I did loads of that when I was younger and its just an empty feeling,

First, find one w/a face... w/masks these days you can still get a 50% idea... 

 

"Sex w/o love is an empty experience. But as empty experiences go, it is one of the better."  Woody Allen

[Somchai Jackson]

28 minutes ago, Antonymous said:

I absolutely never even think about having a bit on the side since I got married. Ridiculous immoral notion.

 

On a related topic. Does your wife read TV and know your avatar? Mine does.

Which is why, Antonymous says, quote, "I absolutely never even think about having a bit on the side since I got married. Ridiculous immoral notion." 

[OneMoreFarang]

25 minutes ago, WineOh said:

The thai wives have no hang ups about their fellas cheating on them every other day...

Do they cheat? In which way? Do these guys love their mia nois? Do the Thai wives miss the sex with their old husbands? Or are they happy when he jumps around on another woman because then she doesn't have to do that job.

[Somchai Jackson]

30 minutes ago, WineOh said:

Heterosexual men are hardwire biologically to have sex with as many different women as possible.

It is hardwired into their DNA to promote procreation and ensure the survival of the human race.

Thai women who involve themselves with farang men are hardwired biologically to have sex with as many different farang men as possible.
It is hardwired into their DNA to promote a solid income stream and ensure the survival of their bank accounts.

[CraigInBangkok]

1 minute ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Personally I think it's different.

 

Let's compare it to food. I love the way my gf cooks and I eat it almost everyday.

But I also like the taste of food which was prepared by other chefs. It makes life more exiting to have something different from time to time. And then the food back home still tastes good.

Yeah I get the analogy but I don't have any emotional connection with my wifes food.

Anyway, I get we are built differently and have different things we value, so its all good !

[ravip]

all of them were well educated with good jobs and good social circles. 

Would that type of people openly admit about their sexual exploits?

 

What are your thoughts?

Difficult to 'generalise' such behaviour.

[JAS21]

1 minute ago, WineOh said:

The point of this thread is to shed light on the fact that we seem to live in a sexually tolerant country.

The thai wives have no hang ups about their fellas cheating on them every other day...

Why not take a seat at the buffet yourself? 

 

Fill your boots I say ! ???? 

That is not exactly the view that MrsJ holds...
 

[OneMoreFarang]

25 minutes ago, CraigInBangkok said:

32 minutes ago, WineOh said:

Heterosexual men are hardwire biologically to have sex with as many different women as possible.

It is hardwired into their DNA to promote procreation and ensure the survival of the human race.

 

It is social morals that stop many men from unzipping their shorts. 

You can tell yourself whatever you like .. its not like that for me. Maybe you didnt get much action when you were a lad and now think you are Benjamin Button.

Anyway, its upto you what you do and you will view it your way and I will view it mine. It takes all sorts after all

It is hardwired. All men are programmed to have sex with many women to spread their genes.

But in most cultures that is not socially accepted. And obviously all those religious leaders tell men what they shouldn't do.

But deep down men want to have sex with many women - and in Thailand they often have the opportunities.

 

[OneMoreFarang]

14 minutes ago, eeworldwide said:

It's all fun and games until it's not.

 

Why destroy what you've built?

 

Makes no sense.

Since when does human behavior make sense?

[colinneil]

Bit on the side hells bells i dont get any at home, let alone a bit on the side.