Today I was in the blind massage shop when I heard a farang next curtain cubicle let out a large sounding fart .

It was the funniest thing I heard as my masseur and even his ran out ,I could hear him apologise profusely.

The most funniest thing was the supposedly blind masseur who had been led into my cubicle arm in arm on arrival ,then unusually ran off without assistance once the old guy in the next curtained cubicle farted !!!

Nature

It's never happened getting a massage, but I could tell a whole lot of fart stories that would make your eyes water.   

18 minutes ago, Credo said:

It's never happened getting a massage, but I could tell a whole lot of fart stories that would make your eyes water.   

 

19 minutes ago, Credo said:

It's never happened getting a massage, but I could tell a whole lot of fart stories that would make your eyes water.   

Please do

supposedly blind masseur ????

Blaming the masseuse would have been an option and would have exonerated him from such a pestilential action.

4 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

 

Please do

I was a relatively new employee and the director was a rather uptight, proper Thai lady.  I had a bit of a stomach issue and had gotten into the elevator alone.  The door shut and I let go one of those deadly, silent farts.  The door instantly opened and in stepped the director.  It smelled like someone had crapped in there.????

5 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Nature

Indeed.

Odd that many are offended by it.

1 minute ago, zzaa09 said:

Indeed.

Odd that many are offended by it.

your wife?

projectile diarrhea as I was on my stomach.    Like a fountain from the depths of h....... It was so strong it made a hole in the roof and is being watched by NASA as it circles the moon.   I tipped 10 baht, felt bad.   

What high school do you guys go to?

Always try and force one out when leaving immigration office.

Hey, They say it's the thought that counts. 

 

 

7 hours ago, georgegeorgia said:

a large sounding fart .

It was the funniest thing I heard

Dave Chappelle, George Carlin, Robin Williams, Johnathan Winters, 

 

Meh.... 

 

all the great comedic minds, nothing compared to the sound of gas leaving the body.. 

Sure. Being old it is more difficult to control thus gives me a right to fart.

My wife asked for a "Dutch Oven", how was I to know she wanted one of these ...

 

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0791KZKXY/ref=sbl_dpx_dining-dutch-ovens_B0076NOGPY_0

 

https://www.dictionary.com/browse/dutch-oven#:~:text=In cooking%2C a Dutch oven,a Dutch oven traps heat.

You always get the best customers at Walmart.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOEypM_EOWI

 

I have "Sharted", and more than once....Did I mention I also go "commando" 24/7? Not proud of it, but <deleted> Happens!

Never farted in my life....often suffer from a trouser cough though.

On 7/18/2022 at 1:43 AM, Credo said:

It's never happened getting a massage, but I could tell a whole lot of fart stories that would make your eyes water.   

Please Proceed ????

18 hours ago, Crossy said:

My wife asked for a "Dutch Oven", how was I to know she wanted one of these ...

 

 

 

 

Reminds me of the time I was entertaining a young lady here and just after the deed was done and feeling very proud of my achievement I dropped a silent one....seconds later the young lass dived under the covers wanting to resurrect the pogo stick for round two......

Tooting during a Massage is only to be expected.

 

 

"Break wind. Fart. Toot. Whatever you call it, it happens. To everyone. Gas is a product of digestion, and the average person will pass gas 8–20 times per day. If you’re in a standing or upright sitting position all day and then you lie down on a massage table, gas may move around. The parasympathetic nervous system may also relax sphincter muscles in the gastrointestinal tract, so gas may move a little easier. Again, that’s your body doing exactly what it’s supposed to do.  

 

Your massage therapist won’t be bothered if you pass gas on the massage table. We don’t mind if you snore or sniffle or your belly growls like a bear. We’re happy your body is working well, and we want you to unwind and enjoy your massage"

 

How could it be otherwise?

 

Feel free to toot.

 

Some of us have never had a massage.

What's the attraction?

I wonder. 

Sometimes the sound of sweaty skin coming unstuck from vinyl leather can sound remarkably like a fart.

I just say: "doht quong Pom, mai men". (my fart not stink)