Making friends with Thai men.

[1FinickyOne]

1 hour ago, Orinoco said:

I find it very hard to believe that there are any expats, that have poo,  that doesn't smell just a little bit.

That's why bathrooms have windows and ceiling fans... 

[BangkokReady]

4 hours ago, Orinoco said:

The hatred is strong with this one. 

 

 

What I found interesting, was that this user began by agreeing with the post he was replying to (about Thai men being genetic supermen with psychic abilities), and saying anyone who doesn't like Thai men must have mental issues, but then moved onto this mini tirade against everyone found living in a city.  Presumably most foreigners in Thailand are living in cities.

 

There's a real feeling of "don't make a broad generalisation about Thai men based on years of living in Thailand, the three Thai men I hang out with are all super smart and friendly".  That or they seem to be focussing on well educated, upper middle class Thais with good English who holiday abroad, which is not really average.  I wonder if these people actually understand how generalisations work.

[CharlieH]

Inflamatory comment removed.

[jak2002003]

Reading OPs posts they seem passive aggressive and sneaky racist digs.

 

I have 2 Farang friends and many more Thai friends....the majority men.  There is no problem.  They are human like the rear of us!

 

And it's not about them being educated or well off either. Most of my  friends are from your average rural village.  Also not about age, I have young and very old Thai friends.  In fact the older ones are the nicest and most gently kind ones. 

 

OP of you want Thai male friends then find some you have common interests with.  For example, I am interested in farming and animals.  So many of my Thai friends I met along those lines, like buying chickens of someone, or getting some help harvest my fruit orchards.  I also like socialising and drinking sometimes, so others I ment at my local bars.  Others I never at village parties or through neighbours.  Once you know a few you get to know their friends too. 

 

Mixing with neighbours and going to local temple or village events is also good to meet people. 

 

And OP, seems a bit homophobic to say you don't want to be friends with gay Thai men.  Gay men and lady boys mix together with straight men here more easily than back home and there is no issue with it....they just add to the variety of the social circle .  

 

 

[OneMoreFarang]

1 hour ago, stoner said:

the strict 444 requirements

What that?

[zyphodb]

17 hours ago, Hummin said:

Basically it difficult to make friends at all no matter where they are coming from. I do have a wide range of people I know and meet frequently based on interest and also social gatherings be it dinner, party, sports events, but I only have one male friend in Thailand who is foreigner.
 

We also frequently travel and dine with a thai couple we kind of enjoy hanging out with, but friends in the term friends? Maybe different meaning to people, I do not know. 

It's the difference between friends and acquaintances, hundreds to thousands of the latter, over the years but probably less than a dozen actual friends...

 

[Orinoco]

30 minutes ago, jak2002003 said:

And OP, seems a bit homophobic to say you don't want to be friends with gay Thai men.  Gay men and lady boys mix together with straight men here more easily than back home and there is no issue with it....they just add to the variety of the social circle .  

Shame you wanted to play the homosexual card, there was no need for that, if people don't want to hang around with gay people that's fine.

I don't think any less of people for that. but you do. 

 

 

 

[stoner]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

What that?

4 minutes. 4 inches. 4000.

 

[NativeBob]

9 hours ago, Gecko123 said:

The profile of the Thai male basher:

 

1. Can't speak Thai (98%)

2. Red-light district oriented (75%)

3. Racist (99%)

4. Socially isolated (89%)

5. Substance abuser (70%)

6. Working class employment and educational background (99%)

7. Suffering from age-related health problems (90%)

 

 

8. P0rn addicts (89%)
9. Angry torrent downloader - rather like to watch than act (72%)

10. Using weird nickname (68%)

11. Thinnest skin - might ignite on simple fact "farang ding dong" (93%)

[jak2002003]

8 hours ago, Orinoco said:

Shame you wanted to play the homosexual card, there was no need for that, if people don't want to hang around with gay people that's fine.

I don't think any less of people for that. but you do. 

 

 

 

Yes I do think that is wrong. He says he wanted to make Thai  friends.  What do their sexual preferences have to do with him?  

 

If op or you were with a group of men and getting to know the group to be friends with, and one was gay, then you would tell him you did not want to be his friend....and the reason was that he was gay? 

 

You think that is not homophobic?

 

When the op starts up conversations with some Thai guys, will he have to ask their sexuality first as a condition if he wants to be friends with them?  What about if some are bisexual?  

 

Why is this even an issue for the OP, unless he does not like gay people simply because they are gay....which is being homophobic!  

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited October 29, 2022 by jak2002003

[PremiumLane]

8 hours ago, Orinoco said:

Shame you wanted to play the homosexual card, there was no need for that, if people don't want to hang around with gay people that's fine.

I don't think any less of people for that. but you do. 

 

 

 

The "homosexual card" hahaha what in the hell is that? I swear a lot of you old guys on here just make stuff up to get uppity about and think you are being persecuted. 

Edited October 29, 2022 by PremiumLane

[Orinoco]

1 hour ago, jak2002003 said:

Yes I do think that is wrong. He says he wanted to make Thai  friends.  What do their sexual preferences have to do with him?  

If op or you were with a group of men and getting to know the group to be friends with, and one was gay, then you would tell him you did not want to be his friend....and the reason was that he was gay? 

You think that is not homophobic?

When the op starts up conversations with some Thai guys, will he have to ask their sexuality first as a condition if he wants to be friends with them?  What about if some are bisexual?  

Why is this even an issue for the OP, unless he does not like gay people simply because they are gay....which is being homophobic!  

 

If someone choses not to have gay friends that ok by me,

and it's up to him, not you or anyone else.

stop being a snowflake and stop making out he is homophobic.

his not.

prejudice is a two way street. not one way.

You called op a racist and a homophobe in one post.

you sound just like the out of control lefty trouble maker type, we all know so well  today.

 

 

Edited October 29, 2022 by Orinoco

[Orinoco]

1 hour ago, PremiumLane said:

The "homosexual card" hahaha what in the hell is that? I swear a lot of you old guys on here just make stuff up to get uppity about and think you are being persecuted. 

I meant to say homophobic, and yes he/she  did play that card. 

But hey,  that's the way some people like there mop flopped, up to them.

I don't feel persecuted in anyway, why would I ?

I can still smack someone if needed. 

 

 

[Elkski]

Interesting thread.  Some very well written replies.   I have really been in a position to know the ability to make friends in Thailand.  I was just the tourist money tree or guy with Thai gal or  some single mom no one wanted.  If things were reversed. In my home I would not like it. We come from a land where we can make 2 weeks thai pay in a good day. 

My main comment is I found it hard to make real friends over 50 or was it just the last 10-15 years in this new society.    

We have all been categorized. 

Religion

education

Tattooed or not

Trumper or not

Democrat or Republican not just a free thinker

Fat or fit

Color of skin

Even color and straightness of teeth

We don't respect wealth nowadays because so many just inherit it or crypto or lucked into it.  

 

Many of my hobbies are not done socially. 

I could join a couples mountain bike club but that's not as convenient as going where and when and at our own pace and finding a private spot sometimes. I was going to a fun 10$ poker game weekly before covid and marriage. I do miss it but don't consider those guys friends.  I have neighbors I can ask or they ask for help sometimes.  

I just believe once we hit 3o you don't make real friends. 

 

 

 

 

 

[2009]

I am not particularly interested in relationships with Thais.

 

The women are trouble.

 

And the men, well, we have nothing in common besides drinking beer.

 

But they don't even know how to drink beer properly.

 

They try to pour it so there is no head on their beer at all; they don't like that. Then they put ice in it.

 

Whereas, I like a thick head of froth on my beer (because I am a real man).

 

I could never really connect with any Thai male relatives or colleagues even after years. A little maybe, but not more than when I meet a random farang in a bar and just have a few drinks n a few laughs.

 

I find them shady, even in their dealings with their own family and friends.

 

You won't find loyalty or honesty in this country. Well, maybe if you get a dog.

 

There are perhaps a few exceptions though.

 

 

[In the jungle]

Young man, there's no need to feel down.

[2009]

14 hours ago, Gecko123 said:

The profile of the Thai male basher:

 

1. Can't speak Thai (98%)

2. Red-light district oriented (75%)

3. Racist (99%)

4. Socially isolated (89%)

5. Substance abuser (70%)

6. Working class employment and educational background (99%)

7. Suffering from age-related health problems (90%)

 

Essentially we're talking about guys who are bitter because the bar scene is no longer a viable or attractive lifestyle either due to age-related loss of libido or lack of interest from bar girls. Financial pressures also make maintaining this lifestyle increasingly difficult, and limit options, including repatriation, to adjust to these changing realities. If it wasn't for these constraints, the percentage of Thai-bashers who were red-light district oriented would be much higher.

 

They turn to booze and other substances to try to cope but this only isolates them further, intensifying the cycle of bitterness. By telling themselves that Thai men are unworthy and inadequate providers, Thai male bashers also seek to rationalize and justify the monger lifestyle which they know is exploitative and soul-destroying. I consider this group of people, who are sadly over-represented on this forum, to be the absolute dregs of the ex-pat community.

 

 

Sounds like you know this intimately.

[Don Chance]

Thailand and Thai's are not multicultural. They are mostly right wing, nationalists, religious fundamentalists. Statues is very important and in a capitalist country like Thailand, money means statues. This is why they will resent foreigners.

If you want to be friends with any capitalists give them money, sex, drugs or statues. When it runs out they will be gone. If you don't give them these things they may try and take it from you. Capitalism always creates inequality, unfairness, resentment and jealousy. It puts people at each others throats!

[Mac Mickmanus]

14 minutes ago, Don Chance said:

Thailand and Thai's are not multicultural. They are mostly right wing, nationalists, religious fundamentalists. Statues is very important and in a capitalist country like Thailand, money means statues. This is why they will resent foreigners.

If you want to be friends with any capitalists give them money, sex, drugs or statues. When it runs out they will be gone. If you don't give them these things they may try and take it from you. Capitalism always creates inequality, unfairness, resentment and jealousy. It puts people at each others throats!

What makes you stay in a Capitalist Right Wing Country that suffers from inequality , unfairness and resentment ?

   Why not live elsewhere ?

[Sparktrader]

59 minutes ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

What makes you stay in a Capitalist Right Wing Country that suffers from inequality , unfairness and resentment ?

   Why not live elsewhere ?

Cause commie countries are worse!

Move poverty, less freedom

[Scott]

Off-topic, troll and homophobic posts and replies reported and removed.  Continue and face a suspension.  

 

[Gecko123]

20 hours ago, jak2002003 said:

Reading OPs posts they seem passive aggressive and sneaky racist digs.

 

I have 2 Farang friends and many more Thai friends....the majority men.  There is no problem.  They are human like the rear of us!

 

And it's not about them being educated or well off either. Most of my  friends are from your average rural village.  Also not about age, I have young and very old Thai friends.  In fact the older ones are the nicest and most gently kind ones. 

 

OP of you want Thai male friends then find some you have common interests with.  For example, I am interested in farming and animals.  So many of my Thai friends I met along those lines, like buying chickens of someone, or getting some help harvest my fruit orchards.  I also like socialising and drinking sometimes, so others I ment at my local bars.  Others I never at village parties or through neighbours.  Once you know a few you get to know their friends too. 

 

Mixing with neighbours and going to local temple or village events is also good to meet people. 

 

And OP, seems a bit homophobic to say you don't want to be friends with gay Thai men.  Gay men and lady boys mix together with straight men here more easily than back home and there is no issue with it....they just add to the variety of the social circle .  

 

 

It was heartening to read your post. Figuring out how to make social inroads in a village isn't easy or something that happens overnight and I can tell you have put in a great deal of thought and effort. Wishing you continued success on your journey.

[JensenZ]

On 10/28/2022 at 3:21 PM, Sparktrader said:

I went to NK made friends with a Thai. Just talk normal. 30 years no friends must be you.

I've been here for 17 years and have no male Thai friends. It most definitely IS me, because I don't want or need any. What surprises me is that people want friends so badly they make it an obsession. True friends are nearly impossible to find and you're kidding yourself if you think differently.  Perhaps the OP just wants buddies to hang out with, but they will never be friends, only acquaintances, and the same goes for any foreign "friends" you think you might have.

Edited October 29, 2022 by JensenZ

[Sparktrader]

5 minutes ago, JensenZ said:

I've been here for 17 years and have no male Thai friends. It most definitely IS me, because I don't want or need any. What surprises me is that people want friends so badly they make it an obsession. True friends are nearly impossible to find and you're kidding yourself if you think differently.  Perhaps the OP just wants buddies to hang out with, but they will never be friends, only acquaintances, and the same goes for any foreign "friends" you think you might have.

I have one old mate 27 years true friend. Most others mild friends.

 

 

[metisdead]

A post commenting on moderation has been reported and removed.

[HighPriority]

11 hours ago, 2009 said:

I am not particularly interested in relationships with Thais.

 

The women are trouble.

 

And the men, well, we have nothing in common besides drinking beer.

 

But they don't even know how to drink beer properly.

 

They try to pour it so there is no head on their beer at all; they don't like that. Then they put ice in it.

 

Whereas, I like a thick head of froth on my beer (because I am a real man).

 

I could never really connect with any Thai male relatives or colleagues even after years. A little maybe, but not more than when I meet a random farang in a bar and just have a few drinks n a few laughs.

 

I find them shady, even in their dealings with their own family and friends.

 

You won't find loyalty or honesty in this country. Well, maybe if you get a dog.

 

There are perhaps a few exceptions though.

 

 

No wonder...

You need to put the ice in FIRST, then pour the beer otherwise the beer splashes out or its hot to drink.

Seriously though its simply a practical culture that reflects a lack of refrigeration, surely a real man comprehends and respects innovation ?

[thaibeachlovers]

On 10/29/2022 at 11:28 AM, Sparktrader said:

Food, women,countryside. 

Same food in Pattaya, or anywhere in LOS, women also every where in LOS ( more available in Pattaya ).

Not having my own transport I didn't see much of the countryside.

[Sparktrader]

12 minutes ago, HighPriority said:

No wonder...

You need to put the ice in FIRST, then pour the beer otherwise the beer splashes out or its hot to drink.

Seriously though its simply a practical culture that reflects a lack of refrigeration, surely a real man comprehends and respects innovation ?

Beer is beer. Pretending otherwise is just a w...

 

Being so hot no ice beer goes warm quick.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 10/29/2022 at 11:38 AM, Gecko123 said:

The profile of the Thai male basher:

 

1. Can't speak Thai (98%)

2. Red-light district oriented (75%)

3. Racist (99%)

4. Socially isolated (89%)

5. Substance abuser (70%)

6. Working class employment and educational background (99%)

7. Suffering from age-related health problems (90%)

 

Essentially we're talking about guys who are bitter because the bar scene is no longer a viable or attractive lifestyle either due to age-related loss of libido or lack of interest from bar girls. Financial pressures also make maintaining this lifestyle increasingly difficult, and limit options, including repatriation, to adjust to these changing realities. If it wasn't for these constraints, the percentage of Thai-bashers who were red-light district oriented would be much higher.

 

They turn to booze and other substances to try to cope but this only isolates them further, intensifying the cycle of bitterness. By telling themselves that Thai men are unworthy and inadequate providers, Thai male bashers also seek to rationalize and justify the monger lifestyle which they know is exploitative and soul-destroying. I consider this group of people, who are sadly over-represented on this forum, to be the absolute dregs of the ex-pat community.

 

 

LOL.

I never had much to do with Thai men even when affluent and enjoying everything Thailand had to offer, so where do I and others like me fit into your narrative of

"guys who are bitter because the bar scene is no longer a viable or attractive lifestyle either due to age-related loss of libido or lack of interest from bar girls. Financial pressures also make maintaining this lifestyle increasingly difficult"?

 

Never considered Thai males as "unworthy and inadequate providers". Just not interested in them as friends.

 

"Thai male bashers also seek to rationalize and justify the monger lifestyle which they know is exploitative and soul-destroying"

In your opinion. You come across as someone that doesn't know much about it to make such blanket statements.

 

" I consider this group of people, who are sadly over-represented on this forum, to be the absolute dregs of the ex-pat community"

Says much about yourself, and it's not positive. Do you even know many mongers well, or is it based on something you read somewhere?

 

 

 

 

[metisdead]

Some posts with derogatory trolling comments toward Thailand locations have been removed as well as the replies:

 

14. You will not post slurs, degrading or overly negative comments directed towards Thailand, Thai people, Thai culture, Thai institutions such as the military, judicial or law enforcement system or specific locations within Thailand.