How much monthly salary should you pay for rescuing a bar girl?

[bignok]

7 minutes ago, zyphodb said:

Because he lives under a bridge...

Really? I answered his question in detail. He dodged all my questions.

 

My experience is 1 to 20 year relationships.

 

Whats yours?

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

What?  I'm simply asking you to explain something you have said.

 

According to you, people who have sex with bargirls are sad because they have to wear condoms.  I'm asking if people who wear condoms in a normal relationship are also sad.  Which, by the logic of your argument, they are.  This then points to how ridiculous the things you have said are.

I never wore condoms with bar girls!

Why do they have to wear condoms?

[NextG]

4 minutes ago, Hummin said:

You see it from a western point, if you see it from a Thai perspective, I have learned that the women is in charge of the household and expenses. 

No… and I’d thank you to not insist on telling me from which viewpoint my perspective might be. Have you more experience with Thailand than myself? You haven’t the slightest idea, yet you make these pronouncements. 
It’s different for foreigners, simply because you are not in line to inherit anything. 
For example, a Thai husband might move into property inherited by the woman, since it was often women who would inherit land etc. His sinsod to ‘compensate’ for marrying into property and subsequent inheritance. So in effect, she would be running her own household. 
But that does not speak to her competence. 

[Lacessit]

23 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

As with any employment contract, you (the employer) make an offer, and she (the employee) can take it or leave it. Up to her!

 

Mine keeps asking for a raise, but I point out the product is now well past its 'sell by date', she is free to leave/seek another employer at any time.

You are such a romantic.

[NextG]

6 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Most wives/gfs will also leave if you stop giving them money.

Sad… that you actually believe that. 

[BarraMarra]

If you decide to take a girl out of the bar then your best is to remove them from the bar quickly i'm talking a week. Once they leave the Village there in the big city where a western loo is available not a hole behind the house. Within a month or two the dowdy clothes are gone and replaced with shorts and small tops. Once there older experienced bar girl's friends have begun to train them in the life of a working girl you probably missed the bus. In short, if they don't have a state-of-the-art Samsung or Apple I-pad or new bike you have a chance 

[Woof999]

How much monthly salary should you pay for rescuing a bar girl?

 

Around 1500 baht, but I'd only rescue them for an hour.

[zyphodb]

9 minutes ago, bignok said:

Really? I answered his question in detail. He dodged all my questions.

 

My experience is 1 to 20 year relationships.

 

Whats yours?

Doesn't matter, I just have an odd ability to recognize a wind up merchant when I see one... 

[xtrnuno41]

Well see the movie on youtube, that movie is 10 years old already and there are some other video"s over there.

But in this one, the woman has 3 sponsors, doing 80000 baht/month (10 YEARS ago).

 

[BarraMarra]

The Condom question? If you want to visit the STD clinic carry on going bareback. See easy to answer.

[Hummin]

15 minutes ago, NextG said:

No… and I’d thank you to not insist on telling me from which viewpoint my perspective might be. Have you more experience with Thailand than myself? You haven’t the slightest idea, yet you make these pronouncements. 
It’s different for foreigners, simply because you are not in line to inherit anything. 
For example, a Thai husband might move into property inherited by the woman, since it was often women who would inherit land etc. His sinsod to ‘compensate’ for marrying into property and subsequent inheritance. So in effect, she would be running her own household. 
But that does not speak to her competence. 

I think you misunderstand, Im in controll of my assets, my money, but what I transfer to Thailand for monthly budget, is in control of my wife. And my experience is, most thai wifes, is in control of the household. 

 

Not every Thai woman is cabable to the same, and not my intention to try to convince you either, but from what I have learned during my two decades of travelling and living in Thailand, it is the same for most of the thai functional families I know. My wife do not need to ask for money to go shopping or pay expenses, and if she is going to buy something for her self, she always ask, and I tell her if Im going to buy something for myself, but I really do not need to, but Im still do so she knows. 

 

Gives her responsibility, confidence  and also trust. 

 

 

[NextG]

51 minutes ago, Hummin said:

A decent thai woman is in controll of the household and the monthly expenses, and if she is taking care of you, you take care of her and her needs, and that can be different from one to another depending on her lifesituation. If she is your wife and she is a housewife, shouldnt you make sure she have everything she needs including pocket money and money for her self without making her an employe? 

 

What works for you might not be the same for others, and not speaking about bar girls but generally. 

 

My wife have access to everything I transfer, but not what I have oversea, and that works for us. If she could not controll it or I did not trust her, I would not married her after 6 years of relationship and been living together for more than 5 years. 

 

 

As you stated, every situation is different. You cannot state ‘a decent Thai woman’. That is really nonsense. Tradition can even differ from region to region. What works is what works. I am used to controlling household finance myself. If in Thailand and married to a Thai woman then of course I would need to satisfy myself as to her competence. 
It’s great that your situation is working for you, but do not presume to dictate to others how it must be. 

[NextG]

2 minutes ago, Hummin said:

I think you misunderstand, Im in controll of my assets, my money, but what I transfer to Thailand for monthly budget, is in control of my wife. And my experience is, most thai wifes, is in control of the household. 

 

Not every Thai woman is cabable to the same, and not my intention to try to convince you either, but from what I have learned during my two decades of travelling and living in Thailand, it is the same for most of the thai functional families I know. My wife do not need to ask for money to go shopping or pay expenses, and if she is going to buy something for her self, she always ask, and I tell her if Im going to buy something for myself, but I really do not need to, but Im still do so she knows. 

 

Gives her responsibility, confidence  and also trust. 

 

 

Indeed and that works for you. But what about the women who have a full time job? Not a ‘decent Thai woman’? 
Your statements are obviously in regard to your situation and only yours. 

[Hummin]

5 minutes ago, NextG said:

As you stated, every situation is different. You cannot state ‘a decent Thai woman’. That is really nonsense. Tradition can even differ from region to region. What works is what works. I am used to controlling household finance myself. If in Thailand and married to a Thai woman then of course I would need to satisfy myself as to her competence. 
It’s great that your situation is working for you, but do not presume to dictate to others how it must be. 

I think you have to reread my first post! No presuming or dictating anything, and no absolute truth in what I wrote.

 

1 hour ago, Hummin said:

A decent thai woman is in controll of the household and the monthly expenses, and if she is taking care of you, you take care of her and her needs, and that can be different from one to another depending on her lifesituation. If she is your wife and she is a housewife, shouldnt you make sure she have everything she needs including pocket money and money for her self without making her an employe? 

 

What works for you might not be the same for others, and not speaking about bar girls but generally. 

 

My wife have access to everything I transfer, but not what I have oversea, and that works for us. If she could not controll it or I did not trust her, I would not married her after 6 years of relationship and been living together for more than 5 years. 

 

 

As said I have got to know quite a few thai marriages, also thai married to foreigners, and same for her parents. I do not state everyone should do the same, especially if your wife is not reliable to handle the houshold economics. We are talking about montly budget, not savings or any other assets you own. My economic in Thailand is limited to what I transfer. 

[Seamaster]

My wife has a casual corporate job, not a bg.

 

I asked her what she'd need as pocket money when she's forced stop work at 55-60 (or earlier if I want to leave BKK).

 

She said 10k pocket money (BKK)

 

Of course, I'm covering all our total spending (ALL). Note...her future and retirement are built into the marriage (and her current saving). Imagine bg would need more.

 

Don't buy bs about her losing job / money going with you. She can be back in the bar the next week after you're done with her.

 

If she's really hot - maybe 30-40k. If she's a looker half that. If she's middle aged, past prime 15k.

 

She might tell you she can make X in the bar but that's rough work.

 

Figure out what she pulls in monthly.

 

Don't cheap her out. If she's not happy then she's gone.

 

**She's a bar girl and might get lazy about cooking, cleaning, ironing.

 

Make clear what extra is out if your pocket. Anything else is on her.

 

Be prepared for buffalo and her own health issues $$$ to pop up

 

[BritManToo]

18 minutes ago, NextG said:

I think that I have a lot more experience of ‘normal’ relationships than you have. Not even a single one of my relationships have been based on money. Even ones that could have been, were not. 
Whereas it sounds as if ALL of your relationships carried a financial aspect, which had clouded your judgement. 

So she pays 50% of everything in your relationships, 50% of restaurant bills, utils, housing, food?

.......... I think not.

[Hummin]

8 minutes ago, NextG said:

Indeed and that works for you. But what about the women who have a full time job? Not a ‘decent Thai woman’? 
Your statements are obviously in regard to your situation and only yours. 

My wife have a full time work, taking care of the farm together with me, and where did I say a wife with full time job is not a decent woman? She can stil be in charge of the household? Right. 

 

I think we just complicate the matter of who is in charge of the monthly budget, and spending time on not so important issues here ????

 

 

[metisdead]

Inflammatory posts contravening our Community Standards have been removed.

[Neeranam]

Undesirable man saves bar girl from having sex with undesirable men every day. 

She only has to have sex now with an undesirable man once a week. 

[BritManToo]

20 minutes ago, BarraMarra said:

The Condom question? If you want to visit the STD clinic carry on going bareback. See easy to answer.

They're not as common as your fear tells you.

And most are easily cured.

[bignok]

27 minutes ago, zyphodb said:

Doesn't matter, I just have an odd ability to recognize a wind up merchant when I see one... 

For telling the truth? Gee. 

[Seamaster]

1 hour ago, NextG said:

Would you be happy using condoms throughout a long term relationship?

Every foreign man in Thailand should have vasectomy

 

Yes, not married? Condom. But can ask her for check. She most certainly has Chlamydia, they all do

[Neeranam]

2 minutes ago, Seamaster said:

My wife has a casual corporate job, not a bg.

 

I asked her what she'd need as pocket money when she's forced stop work at 55-60 (or earlier if I want to leave BKK).

Why on Earth would you give your wife pocket money?

How long have you been married?

 

I've been married for 23 years and what is mine is hers. 

[proton]

Mrs cousin was getting 100k a month, a condo in Sathorn, house up country and a BMW as well as all the trimmings like Rolex and Gucci bags etc, not a bg. Got married a few weeks ago, she looked as miserable as sin ????

[Seamaster]

1 minute ago, Neeranam said:

Why on Earth would you give your wife pocket money?

How long have you been married?

 

I've been married for 23 years and what is mine is hers. 

Married half that time. Together 14 yrs.

 

I do all the local shopping for condo, food. We don't eat together MF due to our schedules.

 

If I gave her all the money I'd be asking for it back anyway bc I do the shopping.

 

My / our finances are and will remain separate. She has no reason to have her hands in all my finances

 

Probably when I start my pension I will just give it to her.

 

I trust her implicitly. She's held 1M baht for me for months and returned it.

[Ralf001]

12 minutes ago, Seamaster said:

 

 

Don't cheap her out. If she's not happy then she's gone.

 

 

 

She's nothing more than an unskilled labourer.

Pay min wage and cover houshold expenses.

Living rent/food/electric/water free and creaming min wage on top... how can she not like.

[Ralf001]

10 minutes ago, Seamaster said:

Every foreign man in Thailand should have vasectomy

 

 

Why ?

[KhunLA]

46 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Most wives/gfs will also leave if you stop giving them money.

But your gf/wife, didn't agree to be with you, only after a salary was agreed upon.  You have actual mutual interest in being together, not simply paid to be there.  That's an employee, nothing wrong with that, just find that not as fulfilling, as no emotional attachment.  Doesn't interest me at all.

 

If something was to happen to me, and we spent all our money on a health issue (I'd never let happen), I'm pretty sure, she'd stick around and take care of me, and if not able to financially, then surely her family would assist.  

 

A shared relationship not built on salary.  

[Neeranam]

3 minutes ago, Seamaster said:

My / our finances are and will remain separate. She has no reason to have her hands in all my finances

I can understand if she was a bar girl but you say she has a corporate job. 

Marriage means different things to different people, I guess. 

[Seamaster]

8 minutes ago, proton said:

Mrs cousin was getting 100k a month, a condo in Sathorn, house up country and a BMW as well as all the trimmings like Rolex and Gucci bags etc, not a bg. Got married a few weeks ago, she looked as miserable as sin ????

If I had this sort of money I would have hooked up with Japanese, Chinese or Ukrainian. Especially, up country woman.

 

Just for giggles cut her off and see how fast the locks change on domiciles and the BMW disappears. Ah, true love.