As the country has no home help, or social services network my misses spends a lot of her time with elderly and sick people.

They pay her for her time, different to the west which pays them through government funding.

 

But I'm noticing more and more elderly that just can't cope on their own.

Hospitals require patients to have their own helpers, many elderly aren't mobile enough to go shopping alone, or can't cope with officialdom, or are just housebound and on their own all the time.

 

The close family social network that used to help them seems to be breaking, just as it's done in the west and I wonder where it will all end?

My misses doesn't have enough time to help them all,

this morning taking a 63yo retired Thai lady to the market, (met her in hospital when visiting 80yo lady)

this afternoon will be with a 70yo lady that's lonely, (lives at the end of our road)

tomorrow 8hrs in hospital with an 80yo lady

 

What's happening to the world?

Why does nobody help the elderly any more?

Are we really all this selfish?

 

This is a problem many of us are facing, some sooner than others.

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Why does nobody help the elderly any more?

It's not just the elderly, young single mothers are left to fend for themselves after their partners have abandoned them. 

So many here look down on these young mothers having to work in the sex industry, most would much rather be in their village, living with their loved ones 

 

No welfare or support. 

 

Shame on Thailand 

30 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

As the country has no home help, or social services network my misses spends a lot of her time with elderly and sick people.

They pay her for her time, different to the west which pays them through government funding.

 

But I'm noticing more and more elderly that just can't cope on their own.

Hospitals require patients to have their own helpers, many elderly aren't mobile enough to go shopping alone, or can't cope with officialdom, or are just housebound and on their own all the time.

 

The close family social network that used to help them seems to be breaking, just as it's done in the west and I wonder where it will all end?

My misses doesn't have enough time to help them all,

this morning taking a 63yo retired Thai lady to the market, (met her in hospital when visiting 80yo lady)

this afternoon will be with a 70yo lady that's lonely, (lives at the end of our road)

tomorrow 8hrs in hospital with an 80yo lady

 

What's happening to the world?

Why does nobody help the elderly any more?

Are we really all this selfish?

 

This is a problem many of us are facing, some sooner than others.

I cared for my late mother. My brother scammed her. The world is full of scum!

45 minutes ago, SAFETY FIRST said:

It's not just the elderly, young single mothers are left to fend for themselves after their partners have abandoned them. 

So many here look down on these young mothers having to work in the sex industry, most would much rather be in their village, living with their loved ones 

 

No welfare or support. 

 

Shame on Thailand 

Shame on Thailand

 

Are the elderly in other countries well looked after with all the welfare or support available? Don't they ever feel lonely or miss their children's love and company?

 

Would the elderly peoples loneliness be solved with welfare? Yes, it helps, but will it be solved?

 

Young single mothers, its a different story...

No inheritance, no love (not even fake love).

 

See it more and more.....

 

😞

24 minutes ago, ravip said:

Young single mothers, its a different story...

I was replying to the OP question. 

 

It's important you read my comment before replying. 

I've attached it below for your convenience. 

 

 

1 hour ago, SAFETY FIRST said:

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

Why does nobody help the elderly any more?

It's not just the elderly, young single mothers are left to fend for themselves after their partners have abandoned them. 

So many here look down on these young mothers having to work in the sex industry, most would much rather be in their village, living with their loved ones 

 

No welfare or support. 

 

Shame on Thailand

 

Yes, selfish and odd priorities.  People would rather feed and take in stray dogs, then help another human being in need.  

1 hour ago, SAFETY FIRST said:

I was replying to the OP question. 

 

It's important you read my comment before replying. 

I've attached it below for your convenience. 

No, you were completely off topic.

Old people have no choices, single moms have only themselves to blame, and they have the ability to work.

Being a mom isn't an illness, it's a personal choice.

An off topic baiting post has been removed 

The western "disease" of individualism  - the Thatcher/Reagan pursuit of self-interest, which shattered the family-centric way of life was exported to the world. While well-to-do western nations had social welfare systems, Thailand, etc. hasn't caught up yet and given the amount of altruistic actions, the government don't see it as an issue. The OP's wife is not untypical. 

16 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

Being a mom isn't an illness, it's a personal choice.

 

Unless raped by their stepfather, uncle or random neighbour

1 hour ago, ravip said:

Shame on Thailand

 

Are the elderly in other countries well looked after with all the welfare or support available? Don't they ever feel lonely or miss their children's love and company?

 

Would the elderly peoples loneliness be solved with welfare? Yes, it helps, but will it be solved?

 

Young single mothers, its a different story...

There are thousands of homeless people in western countries, who's going to be looking after them when they get old?

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

The close family social network that used to help them seems to be breaking, just as it's done in the west and I wonder where it will all end?

 Development brings erosion of old social structures, no matter the society, although,  we do like to ring our hands and pretend its a western, not an eastern problem. Japan, China  & Korea have versions of it too.

Nearly 25 years ago now, in 01. Hi So wedding in Bangkok, of the P-Maems daughter. In preparation for the wedding, did the normal monk thing to make merit. As from CM, she also took her friends to feed the elderly in a poor peoples home in Chiang Mai (bless her). This is the government run poor people place. Absolutely horrific, and blew the minds of her private school Chula types friends who had no idea  poverty and abandonment like this, existed in Thailand.   

This problem has only grown larger since.

10 minutes ago, LomSak27 said:

 Development brings erosion of old social structures, no matter the society, although,  we do like to ring our hands and pretend its a western, not an eastern problem. Japan, China  & Korea have versions of it too.

Nearly 25 years ago now, in 01. Hi So wedding in Bangkok, of the P-Maems daughter.. In preparation for the wedding, did the normal monk thing, and as from CM . She took her friends to feed the elderly in a poor peoples home in Chiang Mai (bless her). This is the government run poor people place. Absolutely horrific, and blew the minds of her private school Chula types friends who had no idea  poverty and abandonment like this, existed in Thailand.   

This problem has only grown larger since.

I may be noticing it more because I'm 70 now, and my wife working for them, but in the past I didn't see it.

Oddly, the old folk I encounter don't seem that short of money, they just have little access to support from other people when they most need it.

@SAFETY FIRST @BritManToo

Please guys.  Stop the bickering.  Those posts have been hidden. 
Take a deep breath and deescalate. Agree to disagree instead of ramping up the bickering.  So, please stop.  Now.  Keep the thread on topic.  From a social standpoint, this topic is very relevant to our times and is something worthy of open discussion. 

This thread seems like an exaggeration to me. 

Most people in Thailand have at least one child. I don't think most children just abandon their parents.

 

There's an elderly woman around me. Her husband died. She does have a daughter. 

 

She also has a cat to keep her company. And she also feeds stray cats that come on the property. 

 

Foreigners too, apparently in the OP thread title? Most foreign old guys seem to have enough money for a caretaker if they're not married. Or just pop into one of a million bars and a lovely lady will rub your temples for a couple of beers. Thailand is a good place to not be lonely for foreigners.

 

Strange post @save the frogs Are you ok? Should the one child give up their lives to move upcountry with their parents? What happens to their income then?

4 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

This thread seems like an exaggeration to me. 

Most people in Thailand have at least one child. I don't think most children just abandon their parents.

 

There's an elderly woman around me. Her husband died. She does have a daughter. 

 

She also has a cat to keep her company. And she also feeds stray cats that come on the property. 

 

Foreigners too, apparently in the OP thread title? Most foreign old guys seem to have enough money for a caretaker if they're not married. Or just pop into one of a million bars and a lovely lady will rub your temples for a couple of beers. Thailand is a good place to not be lonely for foreigners.

 

I don't see it as an exaggeration.  My wife and I have seen it without our own extended family as well as in our village.  There are plenty of cases where the elderly have grown children, but the children choose not the care for the parent or provide support.  It does happen.

10 hours ago, JakeC said:

Strange post @save the frogs Are you ok? Should the one child give up their lives to move upcountry with their parents? What happens to their income then?

 

If the parents cant go out for groceries, the girl can move them to Pattaya.

 

This old lady around me never goes out .... you can have everything delivered in this day and age. 

 

21 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

Foreigners too, apparently in the OP thread title? Most foreign old guys seem to have enough money for a caretaker if they're not married. Or just pop into one of a million bars and a lovely lady will rub your temples for a couple of beers. Thailand is a good place to not be lonely for foreigners.

A few years back my misses helped an elderly foreigner in Mae Rim.

Fell off his scooter while parking in his driveway, broke his hip.

She got the police accident report for him, negotiated the price of his hospital bill to be reduced and paid direct by his government minimum m/c insurance, then arraigned for convalescence in a private care home until he was well enough to return to his home country.

 

LaLisa nursing home in Mae Rim, around 25kbht a month, if you're in CM and a bit stuck, they'll take care of you, beautiful grounds, lots of nursing staff, swimming pool ...... but Thai orientated, you may not like the food provided.

11 hours ago, connda said:

It does happen.

 

The OP asks "what's happening to the world" as though it's an epidemic. 

 

Is it an epidemic or a rather rare exception though?

 

Thais are family oriented. I doubt many children are so cruel as to completely abandon their parents. 

 

8 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

A few years back my misses helped an elderly foreigner in Mae Rim.

Fell off his scooter while parking in his driveway, broke his hip.

She got the police accident report for him, negotiated the price of his hospital bill to be reduced and paid direct by his government minimum m/c insurance, then arraigned for convalescence in a private care home until he was well enough to return to his home country.

Your wife sounds like she has a real big heart, very caring. You got lucky!

8 minutes ago, Trippy said:

Your wife sounds like she has a real big heart, very caring. You got lucky!

She quite likes working with old folk ....... I'm one of them!

Just now, BritManToo said:

She quite likes working with old folk ....... I'm one of them!

We tend to do the same thing.  My wife will visit older folk and we'll occasionally will help them out with necessities or small gifts of money.  A little bit goes a long way.

I suppose we can all ask what sacrifices we made our parents and then decide what we should expect. It's a bit boring to quote song lyrics but I like this Pulp song:

 

Help the aged
One time they were just like you
Drinking, smoking cigs and sniffing glue
Help the aged
Don't just put them in a home
Can't have much fun when they're all on their own
Give a hand, if you can
Try and help them to unwind
Give them hope and give them comfort
'Cause they're running out of time

In the meantime we try
Try to forget that nothing lasts forever
No big deal, so give us all a feel
Funny how it all falls away
When did you first realize?
It's time you took an older lover, baby
Teach you stuff, although he's looking rough
Funny how it all falls away

Help the aged
'Cause one day you'll be older too
You might need someone who can pull you through
And if you look very hard
Behind those lines upon their face
You may see where you are headed
And it's such a lonely place, oh

4 hours ago, BritManToo said:

 

As the country has no home help, or social services network my misses spends a lot of her time with elderly and sick people.

They pay her for her time, different to the west which pays them through government funding.

 

But I'm noticing more and more elderly that just can't cope on their own.

Hospitals require patients to have their own helpers, many elderly aren't mobile enough to go shopping alone, or can't cope with officialdom, or are just housebound and on their own all the time.

 

The close family social network that used to help them seems to be breaking, just as it's done in the west and I wonder where it will all end?

My misses doesn't have enough time to help them all,

this morning taking a 63yo retired Thai lady to the market, (met her in hospital when visiting 80yo lady)

this afternoon will be with a 70yo lady that's lonely, (lives at the end of our road)

tomorrow 8hrs in hospital with an 80yo lady

 

What's happening to the world?

Why does nobody help the elderly any more?

Are we really all this selfish?

 

This is a problem many of us are facing, some sooner than others.

You're seeing the slow shift in culture here where the collective family isn't staying  together, children are going after their careers, and not returning to the family home to help with elderly parents. As you mentioned there isn't the support structures in place across the country like in the west. It makes for a very challenging situation on the elderly and the ones that do step up and try to help. Good on your wife for doing what she can, we need more like her.

Sometimes I feel this is due to the fast pace in life today... add the 'don't care' attitude of the younger generation (as usual, there are exceptions even today)  to that, makes the perfect recipe for this.

 

In the past, the children looked after the parents until they passed away - not necessarily financially, but being with them, taking them to hospital when required etc. Some even took them on holiday trips - I know very well because I have seen it and also I have done it!

 

But today, I see the children wants their parents to look after their children whilst they are away, take the grand-children to school etc. All this is good, if they too reciprocate these actions when necessary - but most find it very difficult to find time for their aged parents when they need some help - they are very busy!

 

Sad, but it is a reality!

4 hours ago, BritManToo said:

What's happening to the world?

 

The end of the world is nigh.

 

 

Also, obviously, she is a he.

 

How much does she earn per month helping the elderly? 

My gf cares for her mother with dementia and brought up her daughter alone. The daughter is as selfish as any western woman. Can't see my gf being looked after in old age.

 

I think this applies to many out here.