4 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

All I can tell you is that chaste love from afar can provide a huge hit of dopamine, anytime one lays eyes on her.

I am committed to being single, a lifestyle which I have adhered to for many years, simply because I find it suits me and is far less stressful.

 

Celibacy is a blessing, and love is pain, when one loves too much.

 

I dearly hope that I will be able to enjoy my chaste and platonic relationship with my beloved for many years to come, maybe even unto my grave, or my prefered method of cremation.

 

Perhaps, by then, she might keep my ashes in a locket.

The future, as we know, is so difficult to predict.

Please do not give-in to any requests for money by this woman, whatever you do.

Off topic post removed.

3 minutes ago, DBath said:

Please do not give-in to any requests for money by this woman, whatever you do.

Believe me:  This woman is NOTHING like that.  Please believe me, because she is just not this way.

 

(As I have stated above:  There is nothing wrong with wishing for more money, or a nicer house, or some other physical luxury. All of us wish to better our circumstances.  Still, this woman is a cut above the rest.)

I think that some times life and fate can be cruel, in that we meet "the right one" at totally the wrong time.

 

Find another who is single. 

Now that I am at a stage where the end of my life is more clearly in view, maybe only 20 years ahead, if I am extremely lucky, I realize that the pursuit of Love and Happiness is not something that one should be pursuing.

 

Happiness, like Love, is a state which can never be achieved through active pursuit.

 

Happiness arrives only through hard work, and Love is something one cannot find on Tinder.

 

The more we pursue happiness, the more happiness eludes us.

The more we get freaked out by not finding love, the less likely we are to fall in love with the proper stranger.

 

It's always best to not worry about happiness and love, if you truly wish to find either.

 

Concerning LOVE, I must refer, once more, to the decent discussion of Stephen Covey's book, 7 Habits, regarding the different forms of love, including selfless love, which is the purest kind of love.

 

In conclusion:

 

Like the fountain of youth, my friends, you will never find happiness by pursuing it.

And, like happiness, you will never find true love by pursuing it, either.

 

In most cases, both you and I are destined to live our lives in a state of the pursuit of what is, in the end, fundamentally unattainable.

 

True Love and Happiness is something only for the gods, and not for mere mortals, such as we.

I know this to be true.

 

So Solly, Friends.

 

Note: The closest that you can come to finding True Love, is to love someone from AFAR.  Once you get too close, your feelings of pristine LOVE turns to MUSH.  This is why I have wisely chosen to be celibate for over 20 years, and loving it. 

 

 

 

 

One of the messages of this topic might be this:

 

One cannot consume a banana split, with whipped cream and a cherry on top, and also have it.

 

Once you have consumed it, then it is no longer so enticing and alluring, and it ceases to exist.

 

Therefore, love from afar is superior to consummated love.

 

Celibacy, likewise, has many advantages.  For example, when one is celibate, then all women become far more interesting.

 

I could go on, and on, and on, concerning the many advantages of celibacy.

 

Probably, what is needed here is a whole new topic discussing the many advantages of celibacy.

 

However, at the moment, I am consumed with love.

 

They say forbidden fruit taste sweeter, precious and so rare, its heaven when find it, and hell when its not there.

 

13 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Correct.

And, this is important.

I am not with her.

Key point.

In addition, it is not morally right that I should ever be with her.

This does not preclude my feelings of love, chaste love, for my darling and beautiful, and so kind friend who is much more than a friend to me, in my own mind.

There is nothing wrong with a platonic relationship, but soon as you try to get to intimate, if she loves her husband, you will get the order of the boot.

5 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

However, at the moment, I am consumed with love.

 

No, you are consumed by a chemical reaction in your body that makes you desire this woman. If you go somewhere else you will likely find that soon as you don't see her anymore the madness desire will end. I don't know the reason such emotions happen to us men, but it could be pheromones, or a memory from childhood, or some psychological event, but IMO as soon as the stimulus vanishes, so does the emotion.

 

I once was consumed by desire for a woman that I couldn't avoid, and for whom I had zero chance of a relationship with. Just being so close and not able to progress made me more depressed that ever before or since, but soon as she left and went far away, the desire ended and I stopped being depressed. When I met her many years later I felt no desire for her at all, and I realised that all my "love" for her had been a waste of emotion, that only stopped me enjoying my life for 4 months.

5 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

The closest that you can come to finding True Love, is to love someone from AFAR. 

I agree, but the problem in the real world is that if we were to ask the object of our desire if we could worship them from afar, they'd probably call us a creep and threaten to call the cops if we ever so much as look at them again.

Not asking them, but casting longing looks will likely end up with the same result.

5 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Celibacy, likewise, has many advantages.  For example, when one is celibate, then all women become far more interesting.

It also has many disadvantages as was discovered with the problems of the Catholic Church.

 

Celibacy may suit some, but I venture that they are few.

9 hours ago, Nojohndoe said:

So your declared emotional state remains singularly personal as in romantic adulation from afar with no reciprocal confirmation?

I have been in more than one relationship that fits that description.

3 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I have been in more than one relationship that fits that description.

Uh-huh.....I bet you have.

????

8 hours ago, Gottfrid said:

Fantastic! Just wonder how you can judge all the characters of this woman, as you are not living with her?

Anyway, I wish you luck on your road to make your life truly miserable.

You do know there is a lot of women out there, that are not married, right?

Remembering the OP is not in his youth, in my experience women of a certain age are not married  because

a/ they are too horrible/ unpleasant/ angry to catch a man

b/ they are divorced and usually have children that they will always love more than a mere male partner

c/ they are widowed, and will always love their dead husband more than any man that follows.

d/ reasons that I can't think of right now, but makes men wary of them.

3 minutes ago, zzaa09 said:

Uh-huh.....I bet you have.

 

Another anonymous poster hiding behind snide comments instead of saying what they think.

I'll take that as a personal insult.

8 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

Nope.

 

Rape, murder, pedophilia, all perfectly "natural", but clearly not OK.  Next?

Monogamy is IMO not a natural state of humanity. Ya think that caveman Og declared his love for the object of his desire and swore to live only with her for the rest of their short lives?

IMO "marriage" as we define it would have been silly given that Og probably died before he was 30.

 

Humans have only been "civilized" for a very short part of our existence.

9 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

Rape, murder, pedophilia, all perfectly "natural", but clearly not OK.  Next?

Perhaps not, but getting divorced and trying again ( despite in many cases declaring endless love till death do them part ) appears to be the norm now. Seems to me that marriage is just a temporary hiatus in the bonk fest for over 50% that try marriage, ergo humans are largely NOT monogamous, though they could be described as living in a series of monogamous relationships.

8 hours ago, jvs said:

Op,you really need a trip to soi 6,what you think is love is just a certain itch.

It can be taken care of over there,no need to see a doctor.(maybe later)

 

LOL. The OP is NOT talking about sex, and a short time on Soi 6 is not going to cure what ails him. Try reading the OP again.

8 hours ago, nkg said:

 

Excellent, I must confess I have rarely met a Thai lady with any real appreciation of innuendo. You could amaze her with some British bawdy comedy.

 

Maybe she would enjoy some classic saucy postcards, or a "Carry On" film for 2? ????

 

 

Alas, saucy postcards are just another casualty of the great PC crusade against anything that makes us laugh. They will not be satisfied till we all live lives of beige.

8 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

The Thai language is second-to-few in expressing abstruse innuendo, as everybody knows.

The Thai sense of humor can be as complex and interesting as is one's intelligence in order to create and understand these complexities.

 

English, however, is still, probably, the most complex and interesting of languages, mainly because English is a conglomeration of so many languages.

 

Thai is not a simple language, and the more complex the language, then the more interesting for the users of the language.

 

Let's not be snobs when judging any language, but just learn the language, and learn to enjoy the language.

 

Perhaps so, but I have no love for the Thai tv humour that usually involves some overblown katoey. I had a Thai GF that was literally rolling about laughing at some Thai tv comedy show that left me stone cold.

I doubt that Thais really understand western ( British ) humour either.

7 hours ago, DBath said:

You should really be more careful with your username and password. May I suggest you change them both ASAP!! She appears to have gotten ahold of them both...

 

Seriously, you have some of the most whacky posts I've ever laid my eyes on.

Whacky is good. Certainly beats a lot of what passes for humour in this PC, woke nightmare I keep waking up to.

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Monogamy is IMO not a natural state of humanity.

That's exactly the point I was replying to.  Natural isn't always best for society.

1 minute ago, BangkokReady said:

That's exactly the point I was replying to.  Natural isn't always best for society.

I misunderstood. Apologies.

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Perhaps so, but I have no love for the Thai tv humour that usually involves some overblown katoey. I had a Thai GF that was literally rolling about laughing at some Thai tv comedy show that left me stone cold.

I doubt that Thais really understand western ( British ) humour either.

Agreed ! I too have often wondered what so funny, the only tell tale sign for me was the whistle and cymball clash to indicate it.

Even translation of text in social media is often wierd and makes no sense at all, yet there are laughing emojis everywhere. I Just dont get it.

2 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Agreed ! I too have often wondered what so funny, the only tell tale sign for me was the whistle and cymball clash to indicate it.

Even translation of text in social media is often wierd and makes no sense at all, yet there are laughing emojis everywhere. I Just dont get it.

I have come to the conclusion Thai humor is based on "slapstick", visually and in some sense verbally.

Charlie Chaplin and Mr Bean go down well.

I remember reading somewhere that sex for women is mostly "above the neck", that is to say, more emotional than physical.Whereas men its all "below the waist" as its mostly just physical not emorional.

So it would be easier to withdraw from the physical than the emotional and there are many arent given the choice as age robs them of the physical.

10 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

You know, it's interesting that you mention this idea of changing one's persona, upon a whim.

What's in a name, and what's in a persona?

 

Seeking acclaim or response on a great forum should not be our goal.

 

My only concern is to impart wisdom, which I often do in many ways, principally for the improvement of the wellbeing of readers.

 

As I stated many times, recently, during this horror show of the virus, what was once humorous is no longer funny.

One thing I have learned is just how important friends can be, and also just how much I care about the recent hardships of others.

 

No matter how many times one changes one's persona, fundamentally, nothing changes and most remains the same.

Curiously tangential !

I am not sure so many would have ever considered the virus itself humorous but I must concede a great amount of the "official" responses to it have produced what could be considered sick humor !

 

 

On 9/11/2021 at 3:05 AM, GammaGlobulin said:

And so, what is the accepted practice when one falls in love with a married woman in Thailand?

Not just Thailand - anywhere... FORGET IT!!!

 

Most likely, you only love her so much [and no other] because you can't have her... forbidden fruit and all that. She will always look perfect at a distance. The reality of your love cannot be tested until she cuts some really awful farts under the sheets at night and you have to go sleep on the couch, then tells you her farts don't smell as bad as yours do... 

 

You don't seem to mention or care about her marital situation. 

7 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Happiness arrives only through hard work, and Love is something one cannot find on Tinder.

 

The more we pursue happiness, the more happiness eludes us.

That is a contradiction.. happiness comes to each of us differently as we each define it differently,,, if it only comes due to hard work, which is not true, then pursuing it