How do you deal with connotations and assumptions you're a sex tourist?

[Mekmong MICK]

6 minutes ago, Mekmong MICK said:

Reckon I'll go out and wear my nike shirt from the night markets, footy shorts, money belt and thongs this weekend when I hit the bars and try to blend in like a local more

Looking sharp Mekmong MICK

 

 

[proton]

5 hours ago, brewsterbudgen said:

You couldn't be more wrong!  It's far more nuanced than that.  

The law is the law, 'nuanced' and it being ignored does not change one line of it, should be handed out to all sex tourists on arrival!

 

Section 9. Any person who procures, seduces or takes away any person for the prostitution of such person, even with her or his consent and irrespective of whether the various acts which constitute an offence are committed within or outside the Kingdom, shall be liable to imprisonment for a term of one to ten years and to a fine of twenty thousand to two hundred thousand Baht.

[khunPer]

On 6/27/2024 at 4:46 AM, Mekmong MICK said:

Hi

 

Long tan lurker first time poster.

 

I recently sold up my dent repair business and relocated to Hua Hin. I was hoping to meet a nice Thai girl between 18 - 20 but I find it difficult with all the disapproving stares I get from farang passers-by. How do you deal with the attention from Westerners scolding at you? 

"...assumptions you're a sex tourist?"

First of all – from my experience and view – it's a question of age difference; you didn't state your own age in the opening post. Secondly it's about behaviour from both the young lady and you. And for the third, where you find the girl; if she originates from a bar or  the nightlife and is well known by other foreigners, it's hard to avoid the assumptions.

 

If your are around middle age – you said that you sold your business, so you're probably not early or mid twenties – and you are walking hand in hand with a teen-girl, then the "assumptions you're a sex tourist" would easily be regarded so by many Westerners. If the young girl is sexy dressed – which many a young girl's fashion can be – the base for that kind of assumptions is even stronger.

 

I replied in another of your threads where you asked about "how to start a conversation", and some of what I mentioned there, also applies here. A nice Thai lady don't hold hand with someone of opposite sex, it's bar-girls that does that, so holding hand can be a clear indication of sex tourism; any physical contact will be so. Don't forget that Thais gives a wai, they don't shake hands. It on the other hand it's accepted to walk hand in hand with someone of the same sex – mainly seen among young people – so if you two teen boys or young men holding hand, it's not an indication of being gay, but rather being good friends; the same for two girls.

 

I remember my first time as single in Thailand; and I admit that I hoped to meet a girl, not especially for a long romantic relation, but I was open. One of the first days at a tourist beach destination I saw a middle aged man walking hand in hand with a young girl – at least so she looked very young, many Thai ladies looks younger than they are – in a (very) short skirt. I was outraged – i.e., he must be an assumed sex tourists. But at the same time I actually wished it was me walking hand in hand with that young girl; I was actually looking for a little holiday-romance after being single for some years. I think it's a reaction from our Western Christian home countries culture and media-stories about sex tourism.

 

If you meet a girl you like from somewhere in the nightlife – dating a nice girl often takes long time, and it might be difficult to just meet one and invite her out for a date if you don't mingle in the right cirkles, like around a university if your target is teenagers – and her dress is too young fashion-style with sexy look, you can offer to buy her some more grown-up style; but not too hi-so, then she might be assumed to be a VIP-class professional. If you make her act like a more mature lady – if you also yourself have a decent dress code – you eliminate some, if not many, "assumptions you're a sex tourist". And furthermore don't walk hand in hand, but like you already have a long lasting relationship behind the two of you.

 

I was lucky first time as single in Thailand to meet a young lady – she said she was 22, but it showed up that she was 19 – but she was good in learning me about behaviour, so she didn't looked like an easy bird from the nightlife; even that she was a so-called freelancer. On the other hand, it is not so difficult in a tourist area; you're not alone, there are plenty of sex tourists, so just don't care about what others might think, mainly care about that you are having a good time together with a young lady.

 

However, be aware that 18-20 years old girls might not be looking for the same lifelong romantic relationship as you, they are rather looking for a solid extended-family provider, or just some quick funds, even the girl is not a pro from the nightlife.

 

My first Thai girlfriend didn't last, but she was an excellent gold digger, which I luckily was prepared for, and also aware of that a middle aged man might merely be on sugar dad-level together with a teen. It's not impossible – history shows so – but rather rare that a teen falls in love with a middle aged or elder man. My friends advised me to rather look for someone little older, which I later did and found in Hua Hin – so there a chances where you're staying, based on my experience – early twenties worked pretty well. And I even avoided too many others looking at me – or us – as "a sex tourist", now I already had learned a little about right behaviour. But most long-stay foreigners would still know, what it's all about: A man is a provider; and if he cannot provide, a girl don't needs him.

[soi3eddie]

I just tell them that I am NOT a tourist...

 

 

[Freddy42OZ]

On 6/27/2024 at 2:19 PM, susanlea said:

How do you survive without a head?

 

Haha very good.

[tomazbodner]

On 6/27/2024 at 10:05 AM, Mekmong MICK said:

I would consider myself attractive and I am successful; I own a Ford Raptor

Bob, is that you?

[Neeranam]

On 6/27/2024 at 1:43 PM, Freddy42OZ said:

 

 

Very simple.  I only date Western women.   

Not only is it easier to have a decent conversation with them because there is no language barrier, but they are always going to be at least middle class versus a lot of Thai girls that come from very poor families.  Western women will also have many interests and knowledge of world events, they are more adventurous when it comes to food and experiences, whereas most Thai girls have zero clue about what's happening outside Thailand and many of them won't eat in restaurants if the food isn't Thai. 

Ask the next Thai girl you meet who Julian Assange is and what has happened to him in the last few days.   I doubt many will have a clue.

 

Its obvious the type of Thai girl you hang out with. 

They're are many I know who know what's happening around the world. 

I don't really know Julian Assange is. 

I doubt you know who some famous Thais are, you probably can't even read the Thai newspapers 

 

[fredwiggy]

On 6/28/2024 at 9:41 AM, MalcolmB said:

1. Who did you come with? Your wife or girlfriend or as a single man?
2. Where did you go?
3. How did you meet this country girl? 

Myself, Bueng Kan, worked in hotel I stayed at

[MalcolmB]

1 hour ago, fredwiggy said:

Myself, Bueng Kan, worked in hotel I stayed at

How did that work out?

[daveAustin]

Most westerners would assume farang men with Thai ladies are sex tourists, and Thais sadly also tend to think that way... reason many 'normal' Thai girls don't want to be seen with a farang because of the stigma. But, if this is not a wind up, why would you give a flying one what anyone may be thinking, esp salty western females? F them. Life's too short. Just do your thing and carry on.

[Celsius]

3 hours ago, daveAustin said:

reason many 'normal' Thai girls don't want to be seen with a farang because of the stigma.

 

What stigma?

[ElwoodP]

Off topic and bickering posts removed.

[n00dle]

On 6/29/2024 at 1:06 AM, khunPer said:

A nice Thai lady don't hold hand with someone of opposite sex, it's bar-girls that does that, so holding hand can be a clear indication of sex tourism; any physical contact will be so.

What dated twaddle. nice thai lady doesn't hold hands in public with an inappropriate partner.  

if she is happy and you are well-matched, she will make it very clear to others that you are together 

[richard_smith237]

2 minutes ago, n00dle said:

On 6/28/2024 at 9:06 PM, khunPer said:

A nice Thai lady don't hold hand with someone of opposite sex, it's bar-girls that does that, so holding hand can be a clear indication of sex tourism; any physical contact will be so.

What dated twaddle. nice thai lady doesn't hold hands in public with an inappropriate partner.  

if she is happy and you are well-matched, she will make it very clear to others that you are together 

 

Agree that this is dated twaddle.. 

 

For anyone who's remotely imitated to to Thailand (and all Thai's) its immediately obvious whether our partner is a BG / Ex BG etc or even an occupational farang hunter... 

 

I've never held hands with my wife while walking around malls etc... but neither do my friends with their Western Wives in the UK, or my family in the UK etc...   

 

 

[Keep Right]

On 6/27/2024 at 8:16 AM, Mekmong MICK said:

Hi

 

Long tan lurker first time poster.

 

I recently sold up my dent repair business and relocated to Hua Hin. I was hoping to meet a nice Thai girl between 18 - 20 but I find it difficult with all the disapproving stares I get from farang passers-by. How do you deal with the attention from Westerners scolding at you? 

 

 

You bought a Rolex watch from selling your dent repair business?

[Pattaya57]

On 6/28/2024 at 11:35 AM, Mekmong MICK said:

Looking sharp Mekmong MICK

Ha ha, that's exactly as I picture you at 52 and 116 kg, except I thought you might have better dress sense 😀

[Prubangboy]

I have been harshly judged my whole life. Whatever.

 

On the upside, my many judgers forget my very existence whenever I leave the room. They just find a new target.