Wife is dead set on moving to London

[cyril sneer]

After watching the queens funeral and Googling London salaries she is more ‘sure’ than ever before.

 

I’ve tried explaining the high cost of living and the horrors of house sharing but it doesn’t work. She insists getting a work permit won’t be an issue after following another Thai girl on TikTok.

 

How else can I convince her? Maybe a documentary on reality…

[proton]

Show her how COLD it is there most of the year!

[bob smith]

start making her fish and chips for dinner every night and tell her this is what you've got to look forward to. she will soon change her tune..

[Gottfrid]

Why do you need to convince her. If you are made for each other, both of you will understand, make decisions and stick together. If she want London and will not change. You want Thailand and will not change. Then it´s final. 

[CharlieH]

Try just saying, NO ! it aint happening.

[thaibeachlovers]

As in the post above, just say NO.

If you give in you'll regret it, IMO.

I wouldn't want to live there even having done so for 10 years.

 

You could try saying that she would have to pay at least half of all the bills and explain how little money she'll have after bills and tax.

I was going to take my wife to my western country till she said she would not pay anything for rent or bills. I'd have to pay all and everything she earned was hers.

Needless to say that was the end of that idea.

[BritManToo]

Buy her a ticket and offer to drop her off at the airport!

[Bert got kinky]

 

Has she ever been to the UK?

Take her on a mid autumn fortnight to Bradford and let her figure it out herself.

 

[Dmaxdan]

37 minutes ago, bob smith said:

start making her fish and chips for dinner every night and tell her this is what you've got to look forward to. she will soon change her tune..

My wife really enjoyed fish and chips when she visited the UK. Normally after a visit to the local pub.

At the end of the day it's just another version of fried fish, something that Thai people eat all the time.

 

[roo860]

When my wife visited UK a few years ago, we had a few days in London, staying Drury Lane area. Her highlight of the trip apart from seeing HM the Queen was China Town, she loaded up with vegetables etc, and said let's get back to our home in Cheshire.

[spidermike007]

Has she spent time there? My wife wanted to move. Took here to the US for 2 months. It was so over priced, most people were so sad, stressed out, and bitter, so serious and lacking in joy, she could not wait to get back here. Me too. Very happy to be here. 

 

Just say no. I left. I don't want to go back. If you can't wrap your mind around that, we are not compatible. We are finished. Let's get divorced. Go to London on your own. If you can. Bye bye. See ya. 

[scubascuba3]

Have you got enough income for her to be allowed in?

[roo860]

17 minutes ago, Dmaxdan said:

My wife really enjoyed fish and chips when she visited the UK. Normally after a visit to the local pub.

At the end of the day it's just another version of fried fish, something that Thai people eat all the time.

 

Still one of my wife's favourites, here in Thailand. 

[cyril sneer]

33 minutes ago, Bert got kinky said:

 

Has she ever been to the UK?

Take her on a mid autumn fortnight to Bradford and let her figure it out herself.

 

Live quite south but this is my plan, let her visit for 2 weeks and go around every <deleted>hole there is 

 

Edit> We both currently live in Thailand with decent income and accommodation

 

Tried explaining that we’d be working in supermarkets and wouldn’t save a penny.

 

Im sure she’d change her mind if visited, if not she can stay there and I’ll stay here 

[stoner]

1 hour ago, cyril sneer said:

How else can I convince her?

have a lawyer serve her with divorce papers....she should get the hint then. 

[nikmar]

Sit her down in front of the computer and get her to read The Sun and the Daily Mail.  

[2baht]

2 hours ago, cyril sneer said:

How else can I convince her? Maybe a documentary on reality…

Tell her there is no somtam in London!

[phetphet]

Ah! The old listening to another Thai girl on social media. They paint a picture that the roads are paved with gold

 

Maybe show her some photos of the Mall, Hyde Park Corner and other local landmarks when gridlocked in the  rush hour.

 

I had to explain to the GF that London only ever looks empty like that at very special occasions, such as a State Funeral and that normally it is packed with traffic, and suffers polluted air the  same as BKK.

 

[Kwasaki]

Let her go alone to the English embassy that will be enough to put her off. ????

 

Or just take her on holiday there that is hard enough to apply for,  maybe she will see for herself things are not as easy as it probably is for the Thai rich girl on tic tok.

[Peterw42]

2 hours ago, cyril sneer said:

After watching the queens funeral and Googling London salaries she is more ‘sure’ than ever before.

Google is your best friend, just get her to google London rents, London electricity bills, London weather etc.

[BritManToo]

43 minutes ago, cyril sneer said:

Tried explaining that we’d be working in supermarkets and wouldn’t save a penny.

Would point out she can find a wealthier guy once you take her to the UK.

You'd the only one working in a supermarket, and living in a bedsit alone.

[GinBoy2]

Now I can't really comment on some of the practicalities of getting your lady to the UK, but.....

 

I'm an American Anglophile I've loved your country since I first visited back in the 80's, actually before that when I lived my teenage nerd life listening to the BBC WS on shortwave.

 

Maybe you should let her experience life there, at least for a while.

 

Nothing is forever, maybe she'll hate it, maybe love it.

 

But if you say a absolute NO, it might become that mythical magical 'farang land' and she'll resent you for not letting her experience it

[Farmerslife]

It is the loneliness and the cultural differences that will wear her down eventually. Couple that with the constant grey skies and drizzle of autumn and the cold of winter. 

 The bad news from your point of view is all this takes time to have an effect and you don't want to spend months/years for this to take its toll on her.

Perhaps a visit to some godforsaken sink estate could circumvent the the whole process for you.

[Kwasaki]

5 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

Now I can't really comment on some of the practicalities of getting your lady to the UK, but.....

 

I'm an American Anglophile I've loved your country since I first visited back in the 80's, actually before that when I lived my teenage nerd life listening to the BBC WS on shortwave.

 

Maybe you should let her experience life there, at least for a while.

 

Nothing is forever, maybe she'll hate it, maybe love it.

 

But if you say a absolute NO, it might become that mythical magical 'farang land' and she'll resent you for not letting her experience it

For Americans easy to go London England but as I said with assistance from her English husband/partner as a Thai let her try to get there that be a a mountain to climb just for starters. 

[Bert got kinky]

 

Tell her to register on Asean Now Forum.

We'll put her right on the matter.

 

[sandyf]

1 hour ago, cyril sneer said:

Im sure she’d change her mind if visited, if not she can stay there and I’ll stay here 

It is the only way out, very difficult to try and explain.

When I first met my wife in 2005 she had traveled a bit but only in Asia and had the idea that the UK was the best country in the world.

Many years later and after several visits it is a different view altogether, ok for a holiday in the summer months but not to live.

Still finds it difficult to accept some of the things she has seen, like more people sleeping on the streets of Sheffield than you ever see here. The most recent was in May, having to travel on a train full of drunk football supporters.

Just says "how can that happen in your country."

[MJCM]

1 hour ago, Bert got kinky said:

 

Has she ever been to the UK?

Take her on a mid autumn fortnight to Bradford and let her figure it out herself.

 

Wife of a friend went to visit her sister in the UK in December / January a couple of years back

 

Before they went they had this discussion

 

She - "Ooooh I wish to see snow"

He - It's b....dy cold you know in December.

She - I dont care

He - Oke

 

So they went

 

End of December started snowing, she was looking out of the window and it was "ooh ah suay beautiful etc etc etc"

 

She - "I wanna go outside"

He - "Put on thick clothes"

She - "Why??"

He - "Its cold!"

 

So she put on some thinnish winter coat and they went outside

 

She been playing in the snow for 10+ min orso and then the moaning started

"Ooh I am so cold lets go inside, why is snow so cold etc etc "

 

oke so they went inside and then she uttered the following phrase

 

"Oke now I have seen Snow, let's go back to Thailand"

[thonglorjimmy]

@cyril sneerAt the end of the day it's something you and your wife have got to sit down and seriously discuss together and decide what's right for you both, it's no good relocating if one of you is going to be miserable, the same applies to staying here.

Fellow members of this forum have their own opinions, but many of them will muddy the waters.
My wife and I seriously discussed relocating some years ago, the trigger point was when I had a heart attack and she was worried about affordable healthare options, we went as far as staying in the UK for a while and my wife took her English test whilst there, in the end we didn't proceed, but we may possibly do so in the future.
What does the UK have to offer that Thailand doesn't, the NHS is far from perfect but it is there and available free of charge. Immigration rules are the consistent around the UK, none of this 90 day reporting lark and wondering what requirements an individual Immigration Officer will dream up next year, the rules are the same in Brighton, London, Leeds and Glasgow.
Yes, property is very expensive to buy or rent, power costs are through the roof, and there's things like Council Tax to factor in, I believe food prices are very much on parr with here, especially Western Foods, and yes Somtam is available, or at least the makings, wine is consderably cheaper.
You'll need to factor in the high cost of an initial application, well over £3,000 for the visa application and the NHS surcharge, this needs to be paid again after 30 months. There's the final Immigration fee after five years, but no NHS Surcharge, after which your wife would be on the way for a British Passport, some believe that is worth its weight in gold.
Despite the naysayers on here, many to return to the UK, many of whom believe they've made the right decision.
The biggest problem, as I see it, is Liz Truss.
Good luck with your family discussions.  
  

[OneMoreFarang]

3 hours ago, cyril sneer said:

After watching the queens funeral and Googling London salaries she is more ‘sure’ than ever before.

 

I’ve tried explaining the high cost of living and the horrors of house sharing but it doesn’t work. She insists getting a work permit won’t be an issue after following another Thai girl on TikTok.

 

How else can I convince her? Maybe a documentary on reality…

I don't understand your problem. If she wants to move to London let her move.

And you get a gf and enjoy life in Thailand.

Win/win!

[RafPinto]

2 hours ago, bob smith said:

start making her fish and chips for dinner every night and tell her this is what you've got to look forward to. she will soon change her tune..

That's equal to the Thai "som tum".