The wife and I sleep in separate rooms. Anyone else in this situation?

[charliechoc]

Ever since our little one was born I've been sleeping in the spare bedroom. My wifes mother was around a lot helping with the baby and they were all sleeping in the marital bedroom. Now my boy is 6 and they are co-sleeping still. Thankfully the inlaws havent come to stay for ages due to the covid situation. Last year I set up a kids room but he has never migrated across.

 

I think it was Maggie Thatcher who said 'those who sleep apart grow apart'. I tend to agree with this. Im not feeling the love anymore. Recently I told both of them things have to change but of course they haven't.

 

I think in a western country it would deemed to be rather odd for a 6 yr old to be still sleeping in mummies bed. But maybe in Thailand its normal.

 

Anyone else have  experiences with this?

[tonray]

5 minutes ago, charliechoc said:

I think it was Maggie Thatcher who said 'those who sleep apart grow apart'. I tend to agree with this. Im not feeling the love anymore. Recently I told both of them things have to change but of course they haven't.

You told both wife and Margaret Thatcher ?

 

The GF did quarantine herself to the spare room when early on in the pandemic some of her store staff were COvid positive....but still being in the same house and eating meals together it didn't make much sense. 

[Dmaxdan]

Our 6 year old grandson lives permanently with us and sleeps in our bedroom.

It's my understanding that this pretty normal here and to be fair it doesn't really bother me.

 

[bkk6060]

Welcome to the depressing and senseless purgatory of a thing called marriage.

[lanng khao]

3 minutes ago, Dmaxdan said:

Our 6 year old grandson lives permanently with us and sleeps in our bedroom.

It's my understanding that this pretty normal here and to be fair it doesn't really bother me.

 

No even if your partaking in a touch of the horizontal hokey cokey and he's got his phone out to show his mates in school..

[seajae]

you need to put your foot down now, when I married my wife, she had been sleeping with her daughter for 12 years, it caused huge fights with the daughter trying to get her out of the bed and into her own room, it did happen though as I refused to sleep in the same bed as her although the daughter wouldnt speak to me for almost 2 years, just grunted. He is old enough to be in his own bed, the sooner you can get him into it  the better or you will end up with an even bigger fight the longer you wait with ramifications that can last a long time. Thing is the only one that can do it is you, if you are the sole source of the family income then they have to do as you say or  you need to stop giving them money, that will change what happens very quickly,  The threat of losing all their financial support or you leaving should cause them to wake up, really have to wonder why you didnt put your foot down much sooner

[chalawaan]

I get sent to the doghouse (spare room) on occasion, it never lasts... Sometimes, if I've been particularly wicked, she clears out our built-ins, and dumps it all in the spare room. I won't worry until she chucks it out in the Soi.

[ChipButty]

It seems normal in Thailand kids share the same bed 

I think it's how you bring them up,

My own daughter never slept in our bed same now with my grand daughter she has her own room

[BangkokReady]

24 minutes ago, charliechoc said:

I think in a western country it would deemed to be rather odd for a 6 yr old to be still sleeping in mummies bed. But maybe in Thailand its normal.

it seems to be.  Some people live in one room.  Some live in a weird huge shed with roofless rooms within it.  I think separate rooms can be somewhat of a luxury in Thailand.

[tonray]

2 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

it seems to be.  Some people live in one room.  Some live in a weird huge shed with roofless rooms within it.  I think separate rooms can be somewhat of a luxury in Thailand.

It's normal all over SE Asia and the Phillipines for sure

[thaibeachlovers]

10 minutes ago, chalawaan said:

I get sent to the doghouse (spare room) on occasion, it never lasts... Sometimes, if I've been particularly wicked, she clears out our built-ins, and dumps it all in the spare room. I won't worry until she chucks it out in the Soi.

On my last trip while still married, my wife complained so much I sent her to the spare room. However, it was obviously over and we got divorced.

[thaibeachlovers]

9 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

it seems to be.  Some people live in one room.  Some live in a weird huge shed with roofless rooms within it.  I think separate rooms can be somewhat of a luxury in Thailand.

That's why bolsters were invented IMO.

I've always wondered how more children were conceived if the previous ones were sleeping in the same bed though. They must do it very quietly.

[BritManToo]

38 minutes ago, charliechoc said:

I think in a western country it would deemed to be rather odd for a 6 yr old to be still sleeping in mummies bed. But maybe in Thailand its normal.

Absolutely normal,

My wedding night consisted of me, my new wife, her mother, and her 10 year old daughter all sleeping on a dirty mattress in a corrugated iron hut (the family home).

As she was chatting to her mom, she turned to me and said, "It's our wedding night, are you gonna bang me or not?" I thought about it for a second or two, then replied, "I'm a little tired after the day, and the long bus journey, can we wait until tomorrow morning?"

 

As for your particular case, we would need to see a photo of your wife before giving any relevant advice.

[rumak]

8 minutes ago, chalawaan said:

I get sent to the doghouse (spare room) on occasion, it never lasts... Sometimes, if I've been particularly wicked, she clears out our built-ins, and dumps it all in the spare room. I won't worry until she chucks it out in the Soi.

oh, i can(almost) always tell what country a poster comes from when i read a post like this.

After all,  this is a common scenario on American television.   The woman telling the "bad man" what to

do.

 

i don't play that game.

[worgeordie]

The family next door had their son sleeping in the same bed

as them till he was 16 Years old  !

regards Worgeordie

[Seeall]

28 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Welcome to the depressing and senseless purgatory of a thing called marriage.

Well said....  my parents christians always told me marriage is a sacred thing.. I obeyed...  what a total load of <deleted>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

u pay , u work, u suffer...   after 7 years with 2 daugters sleeping sideways, a 40 kg do brought back to AU  (10k AUD and 1 year) and a fat cat all on a double bed... cant work am tired... , sex?  whats that?   finally after 7 years got up went to back room, so funny the dog followed me... we then spent 6 years sleeping on a bed at least with sleep.... then divorceed...  paid 400k AUD.. money well spent... happy here in TH now.... thank god....

[chalawaan]

1 minute ago, rumak said:

oh, i can(almost) always tell what country a poster comes from when i read a post like this.

After all,  this is a common scenario on American television.   The woman telling the "bad man" what to

do.

 

i don't play that game.

Not a US citizen, and believe me, I am on a very long leash, my transgressions are not minor when this occurs!

We both get more good from each other remaining together than apart. Also, even in trigger-happy America, I'm willing to bet far less American men end up murdered or mutilated for their "Badness" than here. But then again, there are the US family courts, so maybe being dead is better in some cases...

[charliechoc]

2 minutes ago, chalawaan said:

Not a US citizen, and believe me, I am on a very long leash, my transgressions are not minor when this occurs!

We both get more good from each other remaining together than apart. Also, even in trigger-happy America, I'm willing to bet far less American men end up murdered or mutilated for their "Badness" than here. But then again, there are the US family courts, so maybe being dead is better in some cases...

Once again I will say 'thankgod Im not american'

[kingstonkid]

GF works in a gov't hospital so she has been sleeping in the spare bedroom.  Something about covid she tells me.

 

The affection was waning so i opened THAI MATCH and let her catch me looking.  Things got better until one of her staff got covid.  Now back to square one.

 

Have told her that I am not going to wait until covid is finished and gone because I do not think it will so she has agreed once I get second shot she moves back into bedroom.

 

As to kids sleeping with parents a lot of my friends tell me that was normal and a lot of people stil do it.

 

Wondering how the younger generation feels about it.

 

[Seeall]

24 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

it seems to be.  Some people live in one room.  Some live in a weird huge shed with roofless rooms within it.  I think separate rooms can be somewhat of a luxury in Thailand.

ok so its not the thai guys fault for having 3 mia nois and 4 giks.... as he feels bad shaggin his wife in front of his 4 kids, her mum and granma.. now I understand thanks...

[MayBeNow]

Very common and normal in Asia and nothing weird about it to them.

My wife slept in bed with her aunt till 18. She did have her own seperate room for years but more sanuk to sleep with auntie. My ex gf brother slept in bed with his mum till the same age, very nice smart guy. He could have had his own bedroom. 

 

First you have to convince your wife, because your son likely will cause some drama if banished from HIS bed. So good luck getting your bed back..

[Rampant Rabbit]

My Wife works  till 12  midnight  most  nights, she gets  up about 9am, I work 6 am  to 4 pm I go to sleep  around 8-30pm............. If she  sleeps  with me she'll  wake  me  up and vice versa, I  built  her a separate  HOUSE so at 7pm I kick her  oput of  mine.

If I dotn have to work Ill stay with her sometimes  but  mostly not. No problem for either of  us................good  of her Brother to stay with her most nights  though so she's not  lonely????

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, kingstonkid said:

Have told her that I am not going to wait until covid is finished and gone because I do not think it will so she has agreed once I get second shot she moves back into bedroom.

As long as you both wear face masks while having sex there shouldn't be a problem.

[Seeall]

38 minutes ago, seajae said:

you need to put your foot down now, when I married my wife, she had been sleeping with her daughter for 12 years, it caused huge fights with the daughter trying to get her out of the bed and into her own room, it did happen though as I refused to sleep in the same bed as her although the daughter wouldnt speak to me for almost 2 years, just grunted. He is old enough to be in his own bed, the sooner you can get him into it  the better or you will end up with an even bigger fight the longer you wait with ramifications that can last a long time. Thing is the only one that can do it is you, if you are the sole source of the family income then they have to do as you say or  you need to stop giving them money, that will change what happens very quickly,  The threat of losing all their financial support or you leaving should cause them to wake up, really have to wonder why you didnt put your foot down much sooner

he/she/he/she ......   nah just jokin man... I hear ya

[RichardColeman]

54 minutes ago, charliechoc said:

I think in a western country it would deemed to be rather odd for a 6 yr old to be still sleeping in mummies bed. But maybe in Thailand its normal.

Our 5 year old sleeps in our bed with us. wife says she will grow out of it usually around puberty !!

 

Not exactly the most romantic thing in the world. Sofa is taking a real beating before bed.

 

 

[jvs]

7 minutes ago, kingstonkid said:

Wondering how the younger generation feels about it.

My wife has an 18 year old daughter,i would ask her but it might get me in trouble!

[Bohemianfish]

Someone in another forum said that their Vietnamese wife slept with the kids.

 

My Thai wife in the USA sleeps separately, and I guess it doesn't bother me. Maybe I'm old and this is temporary and the Covid craziness.

[sungod]

It's quite normal for a Thai wife to sleep  in a separate room from you, usually with the 'brother.'

 

Some men actually feel grateful they are allowed in the same house, but this has mostly to do with making it easier for the foreign husband to pick up all the bills.

[ColeBOzbourne]

12 minutes ago, charliechoc said:

Once again I will say 'thankgod Im not american'

Based on your sentence writing skills, I'm also thankful you're not American.

[david555]

It always surprise me so much that some Married farangs are accepting to be the Thai trained husband's   

And even more they admitting it here .... ????

 

But if a would have a only female housekeeper ..... i would find it normally she has her own separate bedroom ...????